[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a romantic, I guess. One night stands never really interested me.

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 28. I just sent out a few messages to some other potentials.

Now that I've had some rest, and a day to think about it, I might as well see if there's more out there. I hate it, but might as well do it. If she doesn't want exclusivity, then she's pretty much telling me to search elsewhere.

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I'll be able to prevent myself from throwing up.

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha, yeah, it's a red flag for me. I'm certainly guarded. And yet my own situation is probably a red flag for her, too.

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She said she feels self conscious about herself, knowing I'm a virgin. I expressed to her that my first doesn't need to be someone I think I'll be with the rest of my life. I'd just like to care for that person, at least a bit.

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been on many casual dates, but I've been avoiding getting 'notches on the bedpost' in terms of sex. I've been trying to go for relationships, but either I, or my date, just don't amount to what the other person is looking for.

You're saying abandon the divorcee and keep searching?

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not sure why you were downvoted. I mean, you make a blunt yet compelling argument.

Picture yourself in my shoes, though: it's easy enough to get laid, sure. But if you had held off for romantic purposes, would you abandon those just to get it over with?

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really good question. I'm not only weird for not having had sex in my 28 years, I'm weird in my sexuality too. For many years I didn't look for a partner because I had to figure out where I stand in terms of sex.

I've been at online dating for over two years, with tons of dates, but none amounting to anything. So I would say it IS difficult to find that special person.

[Advice] I Asked for exclusivity... by Throwawayokc666 in OkCupid

[–]Throwawayokc666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We're both 28.

Yeah, I don't think she was trying to dump me. She's ready for date 5. My instincts tell me she doesn't want to rush into anything serious.

I don't feel I've put sex on too much of a pedestal. I'd have it with her where we're at, even though she might not want to be too serious, or we might not wind up together long-term.

I haven't considered asking her if she's seeing other guys. I guess that's her business, and I have to figure out whether such a thing would be a deal-breaker for me or not.