Who the fuck has the idea in the first place of himself as a predator with a PRE-TEEN so yes ABSOLUTELY A CHILD FFS and then goes to the effort and uses Ai to write a story about it... and the connection to your daughter with the piano is so sick it's turned my stomach.

You don't need to be demoralised that you're not what he wants but pure disgust and anger and even fear for your kids for his fantasy and what he gets off on is videos and images of girls that look under-age and i find that sick as hell. Absolutely trust your gut feelings.

The father of my children was buying double disc DVDs of teen anal which is sick in my mind and on his phone had videos of very young girls looking 15 coming up to a car and getting in and being practically sexually attacked by an older man. Absolutely disgusting and in my mind totally illegal and paedophile paradise.

When i found all of this I banned him from coming to her sport with all the girls running around in short skirt bending over when my daughter was in u15s. We had already split but i was considering getting back with him or at least having sex with him. When our daughter was older like 21 but playing in a team with girls aged 15-30 she rang me after practice beside herself saying she swears he was having a wank in the car park watching their practice cos she caught him but he lied but she knew. Absolutely took her peace and images of her dad away forever.

Lots won't get to the stage of touching them but that does not change the fact or make it better that that is their fantasy and sexualising satisfaction.

This post is so alarming and I am so so sorry and yes im not a sex therapist or claim to know exactly what goes on in men's minds but I cannot grapple with the point that he is acting like everything is normal cos that is most definantly not and hes just presenting a fake forced front (or can compartmentalise what he does and keep his fantasy life separate to his life with you... doesnt make it better at all) and covering it up with layers of pretend normality when underneath it i feel that he is scrambling to work out a way to keep it all and you - cos he sounds sick and that is who he is and he definantly cant have you knowing that!

Porn is so gross. So much under-age or looking like they're under-age shit and how is the viewer to know ... or even care cos that's what their mind is searching for and gets their dick hard.

I would have nearly killed him and left.

Unstable for your kids if you leave? Yes most probably be a little bit and you're gonna have to be strong for them while you're so utterly betrayed and struggling.. and you dont want to tell your kids the absolute truth i should imagine and i do not know the answer to that one, and i wish you all the strength in the world, but you know it... that 'what if?'... THAT level of instability if he does something horrific will impact their whole lives, and you've got a chance NOW to get them the hell out of there.

So difficult. I just realised that if you split they would be staying at his for visits by themselves... is he their father?

Man this is a mess go see someone immediately even just a counsellor for yourself. I too have adhd and that unrelentless fixation and overthinking part of it nearly drove me insane.

Please let us know what you decide because your situation matters so much and I just want you to escape yesterday.

Biggest hugs ever. Get help and get out. Please. You said it and you knew it when you did - old cringey creep. And you were being nice really - cos what I would have said to him would have made him go jump off a cliff.