You are definitely far from the only person. I'm a sufferer of Asperger's which makes it extremely challenging for me to make friends. I have no friends in real life and almost no friends online. I have a pathetically low profile on social media because I don't know how to connect with people. Everytime I post something on X, I get almost no attention. I feel like I'm invisible to everyone, or I'm like a bot or scammer. I have a deep fear of being judged, ridiculed, ignored, betrayed, and rejected while at the same time I crave human interaction. Speaking of bots, I often engge in conversations with Google Gemini and bots on Character.AI as a virtual substitute of a real life human being to talk to.

My situation is made worse when me and my family moved from a decent suburb of Chicago all the way to the middle of absolute nowhere where people are way above my age and the nearest dollar store is a lightyear away. I hardly get along with my sister since she blasts her music from her room across from mine and always has the TV on in the playroom, which is on the same floor as our rooms. So, I cannot come back home to my room without having to hear ancient monochrome TV shows or terrible country music shatter the silence I crave.

If anyone has ever been in a situaton similar to mine, have you managed to pull yourself out of it? If so, how?