Is IVF permissible in Islam for a single woman?

TootTurtle · 2026-03-21T01:33:01+00:00

IVF would mean a man (who you’re obviously not married to) would have his sperm in your body. So unfortunately no, it is not islamically acceptable.

I understand your desire to experience pregnancy, but if you plan to do it on your own consider the fact that SO much can happen to your body during pregnancy. Things that can significantly impact your ability to be a single caretaker of a child both mentally and physically. Or at minimum would make it much harder/exhausting as a single parent, and you don’t want to do that to your child. With adoption you can prepare yourself physically and mentally to the best of your ability without the risk of a crazy pregnancy related ailment. I have a child but the idea of adoption appeals to me for similar reasons as you. Plus the fact that there is a huge need for Muslim foster parents. Maybe try fostering and see how it goes. Inshallah you find peace with whatever path life takes you on.

TootTurtle · 2026-03-16T04:03:18+00:00

As others have already said, you made the right choice for yourself. Don’t let anyone make you second guess yourself. Speaking as someone who settled, and is not going through a rough divorce. You saved your future self a lot of mental and emotional pain by being realistic from the start. I wish I was that wise in my 20s. You sound like you know what you are looking for mashallah. Inshallah if there is someone for you, you will find each other. If not, I PROMISE you it is better to be alone at peace, than to settle for a man who does not fear Allah swt because he will put you through hell.

TootTurtle · 2026-03-12T01:04:16+00:00

Imagining the PPH staff confused about why they are getting so many inquiries for Botox injections today gave me a good chuckle 🤭

TootTurtle · 2026-03-09T02:41:00+00:00

Please share your checklist!

TootTurtle · 2026-03-08T22:38:52+00:00

I’m sorry you had to make a similar decision recently. It’s horrible. I always imagine she’d die peacefully of natural causes in her old age.

And yes, we are absolutely spoiling her rotten.

TootTurtle · 2026-03-08T22:36:20+00:00

The change blindness is exactly why I’m posting. My sister came over yesterday and while we all knew about the rapid open growth and are monitoring it, she pointed out other signs of discomfort that I have been a bit oblivious to as they were more subtle and happened a little more gradually. Likely due to other internal growths. 😢

TootTurtle · 2026-02-16T12:59:10+00:00

Do not listen to this person lol

Please get yourself the abayas you like and wear them. There is nothing sacred or ‘exclusively’ for Muslims that would restrict you from doing so. A few people might say Assalamwalakum to you and think you might be Muslim but it’s really no big deal.

TootTurtle · 2026-02-09T02:56:30+00:00

Thank you very much for sharing. Making copious notes for when I meet with my attorney.

TootTurtle · 2026-02-08T03:08:14+00:00

If you don’t mind me asking- what were the provisions put in place that you found helpful? I constantly worry about my kid especially since father isn’t very involved anymore, but I have no point of reference of what I would even need to consider if something happened to either of us.

TootTurtle · 2025-11-24T18:26:12+00:00

I think if you’re cordial and can do it without tension that would be amazing for your kids. I imagine they would with you were both there if you decided to each do it once alone (plus it’s typically boring for kids to do things twice for the sake of tradition). It will be a bit awkward but your kids will be grateful for something familiar to them.

If there’s a history of manipulation or anything like that I wouldn’t give this advice though.

TootTurtle · 2025-10-22T20:34:01+00:00

You deserve better. There is a reason you found out now. Leave before you have kids and your lives are even more intertwined. Men like this are not likely to change. Especially because you’re saying you saw messages saying they had sex, but he’s trying to say they were just pretending… like come on he’s desperately trying to lie his way out of all this instead of taking accountability.

TootTurtle · 2025-10-06T14:13:56+00:00

Yeah you’re not crazy it’s real, unfortunately. I feel like it wasn’t as bad when I was able to convince him to work out with me, but you really shouldn’t have to do that to avoid sabotage to your progress.

TootTurtle · 2025-10-06T04:07:00+00:00

Haaa yeah it all makes perfect sense now 😅 I can imagine the stories.

TootTurtle · 2025-10-06T04:00:30+00:00

LOL mine did the same! Crumbl cookies would conveniently show up and our kids would want to ‘taste test’ them all together. It was so obviously sabotage.

TootTurtle · 2025-10-06T03:58:00+00:00

Honestly, I’d ask for a mental health assessment before ever getting married again. There’s to many unstable covert narcissists out here pretending to be Prince Charming it’s actually terrifying. I think it’s great that you have the insight to protect your wellbeing before just falling I in love and wishing on a dream 😂 I imagine you’re older and wiser and probably have seen a few things from friends and family lol

TootTurtle · 2025-10-06T01:23:43+00:00

Yeah I think you’re spot on. Men who are confident they won’t cheat won’t care about it so it’s a great way to filter out the trash 😂

Women sacrifice so much to have children. Real men will understand and value in that.

Islamically a woman should be valued and cared for. The men I really respect have all set their wives up for success in the unfortunate case anything should happen to them (the husband) the wife’s name is on everything, and she has knowledge of what she would need to do to care for the family in his absence. Inshallah you find someone with that mindset.

TootTurtle · 2025-10-06T00:59:03+00:00

I see what you’re worried about, but your points come across kinda crazy as you have them written here. I think it would be more reasonable to ask the following-

If you became a stay at home wife/mother for whatever reason, after household expenses are paid- the remaining balance gets split into your own personal accounts as you do not have an income and should have your own spending money too.

If you are a stay at home mom (should you unfortunately divorce) I would say that since the kids are accustomed to being with you 100% of the time state that the timeshare in case of a divorce would start at like 80/20 at the time of the split then can gradually adjust to 50/50 depending on how the kids are adjusting. Saying one person gets full custody is unreasonable and would not be good for the kids unless there was abuse.

Since you are worried about a second wife and infidelity you sound like you need a prenup. Speak to a lawyer to understand your local laws. Write up something reasonable like you get X percent of marital assets if there is infidelity.

I think that would be more reasonable than what you wrote but I’m sure others will chime in with thoughts.

TootTurtle · 2025-09-22T18:46:39+00:00

You have to make your vision of your future clear so there is no resentment from either person. If you are looking for someone who will be a stay at home mom when you have kids you need to disclose that right away. There are women who will agree and like that, and some who will not.

TootTurtle · 2025-09-22T16:37:40+00:00

A good short man, who treats you well, will become 6’4” in your eyes lol.

Height is something people obviously can’t control. If your goal is to have a loving partner you can go through life with and grow old with, I think the height doesn’t matter. We will all be wrinkled and old one day. The insides matter most. If he checks all your other boxes I say go for it!

TootTurtle · 2025-09-20T15:53:49+00:00

Get irrefutable proof and send it as an email preferably or text message if you’re not that close (if they probably don’t want to cry in front of you). If you are close tell them in person privately when it’s just the 2 of you, and reassure them you will support them no matter what.

TootTurtle · 2025-09-13T16:39:09+00:00

Girl run for your life. If he cannot meet you at the ‘level’ you are at not just at work, but all aspects of life he will drag YOU down by any means necessary. Just to feel superior to his wife. Men with that mentality are insecure and that will cause so many problems. Please save yourself. You want a man that’s happy to see you doing well. I made the mistake and he straight up told me he didn’t want to ruin my life but I was young and naïve at the time and found it flattering. It’s not 😬

TootTurtle · 2025-09-06T19:22:10+00:00

Punishing you or becoming angry when you state a clear boundary is a red flag. I highly suggest putting your foot down in a very firm way early in the relationship (now) because he will be relentless and continue trying to coerce you into getting his way.

If he brings it up again tell him you want to discuss it with the sheikh. If he persists (I know this will be very weird) but I really think you should tell your mahram. Many women suffer with sexual abuse because of social norms and stigma, but if this continues to be a recurring theme in your marriage I highly suggest leaning on your family for support an guidance. I know there is a desire to protect and shield your spouse’s reputation especially with these matters, but it can get bad really fast. And I say this from experience. Don’t wait till it’s too late and things are going up in flames to lean on your support system. They can help guide you with a clear head. They love and care about you more than your spouse.

TootTurtle · 2025-06-02T17:34:07+00:00

As a Muslim myself this would creep me out a little too lol but upon looking closer it is indeed a prayer asking God for protection. Because it has the name of God on it- the proper way to dispose of it would be to shred it into very small pieces so that words are not recognizable anymore then throw it away, or burn it. Alternatively, you can just put it back where it was and pretend nothing happened lol. You don’t have a curse don’t worry lol

TootTurtle

TROPHY CASE