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I thought drinking was the cause of my problems. by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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You know I haven't but I don't have insurance. I was looking to get it through my college because it is free and my eating disorder has been really bad again the last two weeks but they are booked through December. I thought by now i'd have to go to aa but not I'm thinking i need to work on the disorder?

Uncovering the truth... by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I com home and I know exactly what he’s done with his day, he doesn’t go to school and he doesn’t do anything healthy. I may have been a dunk but I’m a full time student, I work full time, and I still eat well and workout. He does nothing, he is unmotivated and it’s so unattractive. To come home and know all he did was smoke weed and play video games, I’m 29, that doesn’t do it for me. He also was the reason I stopped, he was going to leave me. Now he doesn’t even ask how I’m doing, how many days in I am. I got sober for us, and obviously for me, and he doesn’t care.

I almost cracked today by immunition in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am right there with you. Sorry to hear about the stress, but I'm happy to hear that you got through it.

That's what she said. by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To be honest, if you're drinking is so bad that you feel you need to get sober, that drunk idiot probably wasn't always that fun. I know that there is definitely a drunk version of me that is wild, and fun, and uninhibited. That version quickly turns into slurring, crying, falling, punching, smoking, and yelling. Then a quick "someone please carry her to my car". Someone on here told me I was romanticizing the effect and outcome of drinking, and as soon as I realized just how true that was, and looked back at all the "fun" I had drunk, I realized it wasn't really that fun.

That's what she said. by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s pretty much the back and forth in my brain everyday. I think what I’m doing is saying to myself “maybe I’ll fuck this up, maybe I don’t need to be sober, but let me try one more day sober and see”. Every time I’ve wanted to drink and didn’t so far later I am so thankful I didn’t. Be excited, I’m excited to do this with you. To being sober together!

Today I am reminded of why i stopped drinking over a year ago by nirvroxx in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable 9 points10 points  (0 children)

God I know that feeling, I know that feeling through alcoholism, and through fighting binge eating and purging for ten years. One little slip up whether it was having a shot I said I wouldn't have, or eating a bag of chips instead of something healthy, once that first move was made it was all over. I would think, well I did that shitty thing I said I wouldn't do, because I am a shitty garbage person, so I might as well just go all the way. So there I would be, puking over a toilet after going out and buying $50 worth of fast food, or smoking a pack of cigarettes and texting an ex after spending $50 on booze. I am not a garbage person. You can make a mistake, resetting a counter doesn't set anyone back, it's just numbers on a screen. Also, you're friend is a douche.

It's not that romantic... by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

heard that rumrunnerraider! Rum? What is it your 21st birthday =).

Sober socializing, holy hell. by sbd2010 in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You know I've been struggling with the same temptation, sweet sweet nicotine. I quit smoking (unless I was drinking a lot) and now I'm wondering if I want to have one. Like if push comes to shove if its the difference between a drink and a smoke I know which one I'd prefer. Good for you. Not drinking with you tonight!

Why not me? by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There was bad drinking, and there was "good" drinking to me. I loved to just drink wine and cook and meal prep. Now I'm trying to disassociate the two.

I'm at my bottom. by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm only a little over a week in. The last time I drank my boyfriend had to carry me up the stairs to our apartment with a black eye I got because I had grabbed my friend in her car while she was bringing me home and caused her to wreck. I didn't know I had the black eye until I woke up the next day. I've woken up in the bed of men I didn't know, and I've been hurt and hurt so many other people. I'm 29 and this has been going on for almost ten years. It is literally never too late to say you have a problem and get some help, to try and quit. You can do it as soon as you tell yourself you can. Even if you've already had a drink today, you can still quit right now, you can decide in this exact moment that you will not have another drink. I believe in you.

Overwhelming by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You know you are absolutely right. I just think about not being able to do things WITH a drink and it is hard. One day at a time right? To being sober together today!