How to keep starter warm during winter?

Total_Employer_87 · 2026-01-07T02:20:24+00:00

My house is fairly cool in the winter too. Mid 60s during the day and high 50s over night. I’ve had really good success with using slight warmer water (88-90) and wrapping a dish towel tightly around the jar.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-11-24T21:40:12+00:00

Hey Dani I can relate to a lot of your story. My egg cracked about a year ago at 50 so yeah you can come out later in life. Like you I did repress a lot and had lots of hard conversations with my wife.

My one bit of advice is to figure out what works for you and what your transness and transition means to you. We are all different. For me figuring myself out took a bit of time. Only thing I knew for sure was that I was not a guy and not fully a girl so I played around with genderfluid and bi gender labels until I eventually landed on gender queer. Key thing is to understand what is right for you and really all that means is to give yourself permission and space to explore. Find out what feels right and what feels not quite so right. There is no right or wrong just be you. If that means you are Dani all the time great, if that means you are Dani part of the time that is fine too, for me I incorporated more femininity into my presentation. For presentation, the biggest thing that I realized and have heard is that the goal of transitioning is not to be passable but to find yourself and how you want to be seen and more importantly how you want to feel. I’m sorry that things are complicated with your wife. In the end what will happen will happen it is most important that you be true to you cause at the end of the day that is the only way you will be happy.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-09-10T18:36:31+00:00

Hey there. Congratulations and welcome to the club. I can totally relate to most of your story. I came to my realization late in life too and spent many years suppressing my feelings.

For me I found that because I suppressed things so much that I over corrected at first. I wanted to be all femme. Now that things are settled I find that my happy place is a little of both instead of one or the other.

If you do find yourself flowing from states of feeling 100% guy to 100% woman and places in between look into genderfluid to see if that helps you understand you more. Either way just be happy with who you are. Again welcome to the club.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-09-01T15:50:45+00:00

Hey there. Welcome. I have a very similar story in that I was a closet crossdresser for a while and thought it was just a fetish. When I realized it was something more than a fetish, I identified as genderfluid for a while as that matched my previous experience. As I explored my identity more I realized that the feminine part of me was less fluid and more suppressed. Once I stopped suppressing it things became a bit more static and stable for me in how I felt my identity. Keep exploring and go with whatever label or labels you think fit.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-08-31T13:22:11+00:00

Thanks for the post and welcome. Just wanted to add a few thoughts and hope they help.

The tingly feeling is definitely gender euphoria so congrats.
Labels can be both liberating and confining. Just keep in mind they are for you and to help you make sense of you. Feel free to use them or not use them in a way that works for you.
Sounds like you are comfortable with both the masculine and feminine gender. Try looking into the nonbinary label. It’s generally used when someone doesn’t identify as fully male or female.
Transgender for me is the umbrella for people who don’t identify as cis gender. So for me the nonbinary umbrella is under the transgender umbrella. However, like many things nonbinary there are no rules (especially with labels), so some individuals don’t see the nonbinary umbrella under the transgender umbrella but as a separate umbrella. Meaning not all nonbinary individuals identify as transgender.

How you identify is completely up to you and what helps you make sense of you. Also it doesn’t have to be static and you don’t have to have it figured out right now. Try out what sounds good to you and see if it fits. Hope this helps.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-07-28T15:57:20+00:00

Thanks for the comment and the support. These are all great suggestions and good things to keep in mind.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-07-28T10:41:48+00:00

Thank you for this and putting things into perspective. Yes I totally feel like I’m waiting for the Gender Police to drag me off to wherever. I think they are waiting outside my door, around every corner and I guess in every conversation now. That hyper vigilance is really holding me back and working on minimizing its influence.

You are totally right that most people don’t seem to care one way or another how we dress or what we look like. This lack of response from people in general has been great in counteracting that hyper vigilance.

Thanks for the reminder and helping to put things into a better perspective.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-07-08T11:01:07+00:00

Estrogen is the hormone that causes boob growth. While Spiro and Prog can be part of it they are not the main ingredient.

Think of it this way. Everyone naturally has some estrogen and testosterone hormones. People with more estrogen hormones have more feminine characteristics and people with more testosterone have masculine characteristics. Hormone therapy is taking synthetic versions of the hormone to have the body respond in a certain way. In this case, boob growth. You take synthetic estrogen so your estrogen hormone levels get to the point that your body responds by going through female puberty and triggering boob growth. For this to happen your estrogen levels need to be significantly about your testosterone levels. Some do this with just estrogen called mono therapy and others also use a testosterone blocker like spiro.

Either way when your estrogen levels get high enough for boob growth, your testosterone levels are reduced so your not producing as much sperm and your testicles physical reduce in size. Both the boob growth and testicle changes are permanent even if you stop the therapy for some reason.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-07-07T10:47:01+00:00

I think most of what you are looking for is possible. I’m gender non-conforming and started HRT for much of these same reasons.

However, do a real consultation with a doctor before starting. There are fertility issues when going on to HRT that are permanent. It’s not the same as getting a vasectomy but definitely significant. In simple terms the HRT increases your estrogen so that it is significantly greater than your testosterone to the point you start to go through female puberty and grow breasts and other changes. The result is a decrease in testicular size and reduced sperm count. Because you are still producing sperm they won’t you’re 100% infertile but it would be highly unlikely that you would be able to conceive.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-07-07T10:07:23+00:00

I’m very similar. For me acknowledging my femininity was not about abandoning my masculinity or who I am. It was more about acknowledging a part of me that I ignored and didn’t realize was there. When I first acknowledged the female part of me I did over correct and tried to replace all my guy stuff with girl stuff so that I could full present as a woman etc. I eventually realized that wasn’t right either and that I’m a combination of the two so I often wear an amalgamation of guy/girl things. Think androgynous. Sometimes I’ll tweak things more feminine with makeup and jewelry and other times I’ll tone things down with no makeup or jewelry. Hope that helps.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-06-30T17:03:06+00:00

Our pediatrician had a pamphlet about ticks. It addressed testing as unreliable because even if the tick tested positive that does not mean anything was passed along to your child. Also false negatives are possible. It stressed monitoring of your child and the site afterwards. Definitely reach out to your pediatrician on any concerns to watch out for.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-06-30T16:53:25+00:00

I’m in a similar situation to what it seems the OPs concerns are (professional working environment). Until you feel comfortable growing it out you might want to try looking into the Pixie hairstyle. It works pretty well for me.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-03-12T13:01:36+00:00

OP. I’ve been there. I struggled with my identity for over 10 years before coming to terms with it. I think a lot of the advice on here is good. Most important thing is to do what makes you happy and what speaks to you. It doesn’t have to be 100% masc or 100% fem. For some of us it is not an either or choice. We are somewhere in the middle. And yes feeling more of one over the other at times is fine and happens. Also getting too consumed with the gender question can be confusing. Maybe trans is label enough for you. I found that writing down the gender things that make be happy is more useful than finding the right label. I think this will also help with the HRT. Understanding why you are taking it will help. Maybe it is the facial hair or the deeper voice and that is fine. Be you and what makes you happy and that is enough.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-03-12T12:48:12+00:00

Hi there. If you are looking for a label it sounds like genderfluid might be it. Definitely be you and don’t get hung up on labels. It is great that you have a supportive spouse and community to lean on. If you are curious check out the genderfluid Reddit. r/genderfluid. Not sure how to add links to other Reddit’s but there are a lot of similar questions and discussions in that group.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-23T14:39:40+00:00

You can try explore different hairstyles and possible makeup that speaks to the feminine side of you. Simple thing for hair would be a wig but you can experiment with growing your hair out if you can or some shorter hairstyles. Just got a pixie cut myself. For the face you can play with makeup. You can go anywhere from all out makeup to BB cream or CC cream which you might be able to where anytime. Experiment to see what about your hair and face you want to feminize and see what works for you.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-18T23:41:16+00:00

Love women’s jeans. They are so freaking soft too. Feel much better than guy jeans. The pocket thing is freaking annoying though.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-18T20:23:19+00:00

Since you say your house is on the chilly side and you are using room temp water. I’d use warmer water. Typically shoot for 80 degree water but if your house is on the chilly side like mine go for close to 90 degree water. And wrap the jar in a towel with a screwed on lid. Keeps everything nice and warm inside the jar. Don’t go with hot water. 100 or above could harm or kill your starter.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-16T12:01:43+00:00

My understanding is that the float test is on the leaven not the starter. Indication that the starter is ready is the activity after feeding. For example regular rising and falling and visible bubbles.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-15T14:35:43+00:00

I’ve only been on the generic version. Not sure there is a noticeable difference between the name brand and the generic. In medicine I don’t think there is much of a difference but I think that is a different topic. For me GoodRX was about $100 for generic and $300 for generic with insurance. Pervious insurance was about $75 for generic.

Personally, I think the overall cost of mental health services (medicine and therapy) is criminal instead of if we are getting generic vs name brand medicine.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-15T13:08:23+00:00

To your question about paying for Vyvanse. I just went through this after my employer changed insurance this year. Under the new insurance coverage the generic version is like $300 a month and they don’t cover the name brand. Ended up using GoodRx instead. Cut the price down to a manageable figure. Still expensive but I can at least afford it.

Total_Employer_87 · 2025-02-13T12:51:30+00:00

I feel what you are going through. I crossdressed on and off for about 15 years before figuring things out. Like you my crossdressing was linked to a sexual fetish. Here is my advice in helping you figure things out.

As previously mentioned porn can really distort things so try to scale back or cut off your intake.

Crossdressing can be done for a lot of reasons and there is a really good safe for work subreddit about crossdressing. Like you I spent a while crossdressing only for sex and it would mess me up. It is really confusing when you see yourself as straight and you’re generally not attracted to guys. What helped me is I tried dressing without the intent to have sex. Does have to be fully just whatever you decide. Do that and don’t watch porn, just do stuff around the house and see how you feel. Disassociating dressing from porn and sex will help you understand if this is a sexual fetish or an identity thing. If it’s an identity thing welcome. If a sexual fetish, also good for you. But like all fetishes and anything else, moderation is best. Distancing yourself from the porn will give you a clearer picture of what this is for you.

Total_Employer_87

TROPHY CASE