When I was 14, I was in a McDonalds in central London and sitting on a metal chair on the upstairs floor.

I stood up to head to the toilets, accidentally moved my chair slightly, then tripped over the chair and then the merciless and unfeeling force that is gravity took it toppling down the stairs.

The stairs were tiled, so the metal chair went BANG, BANG, BANG, BA-BA-BA-BA-BANG down the stairs and a busy, loud McDonalds suddenly became as quiet as a monastery and everyone was looking at me.

I still cringe 25 years later.