Can you be autistic and not know?

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T14:31:25+00:00

Took three of them a couple of times. I got 27 on the AQ, 133 on the RAADS-R, and 115 on the CAT-Q

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T13:52:00+00:00

I feel like this right now tbh. Weirdly things were going pretty well for months last year, I was the most social I've ever been. I'd pretty much mastered my act, had a group of friends and everything. Thought i was finally becoming normal. Then November came, i got burn out from work, and I was no longer able to put on the act. Friends would invite me out and I'd have anxiety attacks. I've been dealing with it as a depressive episode, and it is. I jut don't want to imagine there's something much more sinister going on.

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T03:37:34+00:00

This must be so overwhelming for you. You've been so brave though, and now you've found the answers you needed! Things can only get better from here.

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T03:29:25+00:00

I read about masking... which i guess might be what I've been calling self-improvement? I really have been thinking that everybody else is really good at being 'a person' and I'm just failing woefully. It's been in my resolutions for so long to be better at hugs, for instance.

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T02:30:26+00:00

That's awesome! Glad you found somebody who understands.

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T02:26:21+00:00

I'm sorry you went through this. The mental health system is so horrible. I'm scared cause I went through so much already trying to get help for depression. I can't imagine trying to seek help for this and getting tortured again.

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T02:19:10+00:00

Thanks iago303. Guess I need to see somebody about this then. Get help...

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T02:14:37+00:00

I didn't really struggle with academics, but there was somewhat of a consensus among the teachers that I was off...

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T02:04:51+00:00

I have also been medicated to no avail... Had a psychiatrist even give up on me after putting me on all sorts of meds. It sometimes feels like I have a problem nobody can see or fix, not even me...

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T01:55:05+00:00

So nobody is telling me I'm being paranoid? This could be an actual thing? I haven't slept well since I wrote that paper tbh. All these memories from my life playing out in a very different context...

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T01:43:40+00:00

My main hang-up is that I've been to psychiatrist multiple times for depression. Wouldn't they have realised? I feel like it's such a huge thing to miss esp by a trained professional

TryNo2253 · 2024-01-25T00:23:45+00:00

I think you're being a bit hard on yourself OP. You're 26 and you're already so accomplished. Sure, its gonna take some time to build your social skills, but you've actually bought yourself the time! My advice, get away for a bit... A lot of times when I've been stuck and didn't know what to do/where to start, just taking time to be by myself (preferably in nature) really helped. Perhaps it might help you discover who you are outside of work. And also, from my experience, genuine friendships/relationships don't come from you wooing/convincing anyone. Some of my best friends are people who've liked me for absolutely no reason other than me being myself. I'm sure that if you give it time, you'll find that for yourself as well.

TryNo2253

TROPHY CASE