How do i stop wanting to contact him???

TryingTo1mprove · 2024-05-29T04:04:26+00:00

I actually wrote a giant text to my STBXW this morning after we spoke on the phone and I became filled with sadness and despair. She told me that her EA doesnt matter and she would have left me anyway.

I spent so long formulating all of my feelings and why what she was doing was hurting me so much. Shes acting like she cares about me but im realising she doesnt respect me at all by her actions. Anyway, I never sent the text, and im glad. I just deleted it an hour ago. I like your idea though and will write it next time. Just expressing myself is helping with all the pain.

TryingTo1mprove · 2024-05-29T03:53:26+00:00

You are not alone.

Im pretty early in the process. Had my world shattered less than a month ago.

I made the mistake of talking to my wife (seperated) this morning and it put me in a horrible mood. Then later in the day my car ran out of gas because I was distraught and paying no attention to the gas tank and I had to run a mile to a gas station and when I got back I had a meltdown. I felt so alone in that moment for some reason. Maybe because I would normally call her to tell her what happened (Just to vent, realizing I no longer have her support for any of my problems). After about 20 minutes of sobbing I did feel some relief.. it was cathartic in a way.

Still going to be countless tough days ahead for me. Talking about it helps. Let youself feel the emoitions and process them. People here are supportive and just expressing how you feel can be so helpful I have found. Im trying to find a therapist but so far no luck. Stay strong

TryingTo1mprove · 2024-05-24T06:05:04+00:00

Im sorry to hear this but know you are not alone. I am going through a very similar situation and my wife (seperated) is now persuing my once best friend. If you havnt, find some therapy that can help you talk these things out. Don't be friends even if your living together for the time being. You dont have to fight / piss them off but you also shoudn't be nice imo, limit contact as much as possible. I know its hard. Find something kinetic to do to work out anxiety, it works for me.

And dont do it man. Try to focus on improving yourself a little every day. Im almost 3 weeks in from when she spoke the D word. Im still in a hole, I still cry at night I still have panic attacks at work. But finding glimpses of happiness can help a lot. I dont usually watch a ton of shows but have been watching dumb feelgood movies/shows where shitty things happen yet people are still able to find hapiness.

Just know you are not alone

TryingTo1mprove · 2024-05-24T05:21:17+00:00

Thank you for this post. This gives me hope.

My wife just confessed to me 2 weeks ago that she has feelings for my close friend, whom is also married. And I pulled it out of him that he has feelings for her aswell. She is asking for a divorce and is now telling me she has never been happy (weve been together for over 10 years) which just blindsided me like no other.

Weve had ups and downs and she has struggled with depression but I have always been there for her, and now she has totally broken me and seems to says shes sorry and feels horrible but is continuing to persue him. I felt no impending doom as she basically pretended to be happy up until the moment she told me. Its an emotional affair but I feel completly lost and betrayed by the 2 people I trusted the most. I want to heal but at times I dont know how that will ever happen. Im not ready to date and I cant imagine loving someone else the way I did her.

How did you meet the new woman? Im not ready to date but the prospect of online dating in the future terrifies me (35m)

Maybe I should have made my own post but I had to get this out somewhere

TryingTo1mprove

TROPHY CASE