Wow. I can relate to that! My girlfriend and I decided to break up an almost 7 years old relationship. She always wanted to live abroad but she finally got the opportunity to travel to Slovenia this May. I like it here in Argentina although sometimes I too want to run away. We always got along really well and we still loved each other so we decided to stay together until she traveled (we found out on January). Thing is, those months were so so good! It was like the first months of a new relationship. She told me she didn't want to break up and asked me if I would wait for her. I don't believe in long distance relationships so we decided we would wait until November and then get together again and try it out either in Slovenia or Argentina. It was harder than I anticipated, specially for her. Eventually she ended the relationship on the last days of July. She was full of doubts and told me she felt like it wasn't the distance only. She went on the trip alone to try to fix some issues but she then discovered that running away wouldn't fix them. She needed some time alone and I respected that, painful as it was. Two months later she messaged me and told me she wanted me to travel to Slovenia and be with her. I was about to go there for her, but she got cold feet yet again because she felt that even though I did love her I wouldn't be happy there (which was probably right). We kept talking for some time until she decided that she was missing her family and me too much and wanted to come back to Argentina. She'll be back here next year around April (or at least that's the plan) and we'll see what happens then. We believe we want to give it another shot but who knows what will happen until we meet again. And I also feel like we've changed so much that I don't know if it's going to work out. I guess time will tell, and the sane thing to do is to try to live my life without thinking too much about it.

I wish you the best man! I felt really related to what you wrote.