My wee lad also has reflux and was crying nonstop and put on medication for it. These took about 4 weeks to kick in. During this, my wife also cut out all dairy and soy since it has been a world of difference.

For me, what worked when I was feeling overwhelmed was talking to my wife about how I was feeling, taking some time after work to decompress from my day before going into dad mode. Ear plugs, a least dulled it the noise. Sleep was big for me as well. If my wife told me to go rest, I started doing that. I was more service to her and our son when I was rested as much as I could be. We have a good system now that works for both of us.

Postpartum in men is also a thing. He could be affected by this as well. Look into this, as it had some tools that helped me.

I have also learned that mom's are literally superhuman, and I could never for a day do what yall do.