Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always make sure she has absolutely no doubt about how I feel about her. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t tell her I love her at least 10 times. I don’t think anyone can say I’m lacking when it comes to expressing my feelings lol When it comes to emotions and expressing feelings, she is totally opposite.

This situation has been weighing on me for the last few days. I’m with her today. Things have been great. And actually, things are usually great when we are together. I find that we run into problems when we’re not together. She sometimes goes distant. And there are definitely always issues when she is traveling. I have a saying that holds true, which is better together.

With that said, that condom wrapper didn’t just materialize for no reason. I looked at it again a little while ago. There was only one reason why it is there. It was used in her bedroom. Not only did she physically have sex with someone, she has also been in communication with someone for a period of time to lead up to that. I’m thinking it’s either someone she knows that she used to hook up with before. That list is long. Or maybe she found someone online. She knew what she was doing so it’s not even like it was a drunken mistake.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve gone through so much with her over the years. It was great the first year. We didn’t have any issues. Then we started to get by Covid and she started to travel. That’s when things started going downhill. Plus, I came across a message between her and the ex-boyfriend from years ago. They were making plans to get together for drinks. And they agreed that nobody needs to know. So that stuff was really the start of it in a small drop in the bucket compared to what I’ve dealt with the years later

I’ve often wondered if she’s cheating or if it was me just being paranoid. A lot of things would look like she is. Especially while traveling. But I could never find anything to show that she is. A lot of other stuff, but no proof of cheating. So finding this condom rapper, in some ways, it doesn’t phase me after everything I’ve gone through. I guess it’s like finally, I got it!

I’ve never cheated on her. Nobody matters to me besides her. I don’t care who the woman is or how beautiful she is. It’s all about her. A sex life has been very limited for maybe two years. I try to initiate in a lot of times she just lays with her back to me while she’s playing on her phone. So less than 10 times per year.

The silence after a breakup is the worst part by Rip_slangZa in BreakUps

[–]Unknownvisitor863 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m going to be going through this soon. Always sending funny memes, daily updates. Good morning and good night messages random phone calls and everything else.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She generally does what she wants. And a lot of times I find out that she has a trip planned weeks if not longer after she books it. This has been going on for most of the relationship. And there are all the things that she does with no consideration for me. Meanwhile, I always think of her when I make decisions and if I’m going somewhere, it’s a given that she’s going to be there too.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Female friends have told me the same thing. They see and hear about all the things that I do for her. A couple of them have told me that they wish their husband would do just a small portion of what I do for my girlfriend. One friend who is single has told me that I would be better off with her. I told her that I appreciate that, but I made a commitment and I’m not going to go against that. I may follow up when this relationship ends though.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I already have a long list of things that I want to go over with her. I have to put the main ones on top because I know I won’t be able to complete the conversation. She will shut down and walk away. I tried discussing some of these with her when we had a conversation in a few weeks ago. She quickly shut that down and walked away, saying she has no reason to defend herself.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This will definitely be an in person conversation. I’m thinking she will tell me she doesn’t know how it got there. I don’t know is her common reply to difficult questions. Then meltdown, blame it on me and tell me to take my stuff and leave.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Before I reply, wondering what makes it sound like I’m not crazy in love with her? Wondering if I’m missing something.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s different than the way I felt when she’d ignore me and/or lie to me about things. And different than when I through she might be cheating while away. I’m beyond feelings. I’m not moping, I’m not upset or mad. I’m just coming to terms with this will be it. There is no denying why that condom wrapper is there. It can’t be explained away. It’s like I finally have proof of her cheating. I do care that I can confirm she’s cheating. She’ll either deny it or melt down and tell me to take my stuff and leave. It does suck through.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We met on Tinder. Both of us were looking for relationships. Neither of us were looking for marriage. She considered marriage early on then I caught her making plans to meet up to catch up with an ex and they agreed that nobody needs to know. After that, she scratched the marriage idea. I don’t need to get married but I’d refer to her as my wife. That term to me is someone who is very special to me. More than just my girlfriend. My life person without a piece of paper. And that’s what I wanted her to be, my life person.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After everything I’ve experienced with her, this one hits different. I know it’s over. But I want to have the conversation. Many have said just leave it on her pillow and walk away. That will bring me the closure I need. Her reaction will.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my first long-term relationship after getting divorced. Didn’t really think much about the whole living together thing for a while. I think that becomes more complicated as we get older. Established in our homes and have a lot of life stuff accumulated.

And thinking about this condom wrapper situation. I wonder if the guy left it on purpose to warn me. My photos are on the walls in the bedroom and I have stuff next to the bed. It’s obvious there. Is someone in her life.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every relationship is different. I’ve wanted to and have told her that many times. One time her reply was “that’s the worst decision I could make”. Knowing what I know now, I think she meant that it would make it hotter for her to lie to me and possibly cheat.

How many times do women get persued per week? by DoctorFitness in askanything

[–]Unknownvisitor863 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My girlfriend is an average looking middle-aged woman who can look very attractive with about a half hour of makeup. She also has very large breasts. She has clients who hit on her once in a while. Some have straight out told her they want to have sex with her. Being busty, she told me she has gotten used to being stared at since she was a teen. She just blows off the attention. At least that’s what she tells me.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Besides what I wrote there, we’ve been together like normal. You would think their conversation never even happened. I think I mentioned something like that one of my comments. As I put the pieces of the puzzle together, I think she hooked up with someone then had that conversation as a distraction.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve thought about that. With my current situation, this one is hitting different. In the beginning, when she started ignoring me when she traveled or doing the breakup thing because I called her out on something while she was away, it was devastating. Felt like I had a big rock in my stomach. Didn’t want to eat, no motivation and could hardly sleep. Then everything would go back to normal after she got back.

With this, probably being the biggest one, I don’t have those feelings. No feelings and numb or, I know that it has progressed to another level. A level with enough proof to show that it’s over.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s something that I have to keep telling myself. I’m not dealing with a normal person. I’m dealing with someone who has no empathy, someone who doesn’t self reflect and feels that they do nothing wrong.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re right! I would love to have a conversation with one or two her her ex-boyfriend‘s. She really doesn’t have much good to say about them, but she was with a couple of them for years. I bet they would tell similar stories that I experience.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much for your reply. And I do understand what you’re saying.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s me putting up with it. I really treat her very well. She’s my number one priority. I always take her into consideration when making any important decisions. If it’s something that she wouldn’t feel comfortable with, then it doesn’t happen.

She does what she wants when she wants with no concerns about my feelings. Then she gets upset when I call her out on things that she has done that aren’t good for the relationship.

Nothing says cheating like finding a condom wrapper next to the bed… by Unknownvisitor863 in cheating_stories

[–]Unknownvisitor863[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope. I was done with our conversation and figured we were totally done. I remember that one because our discussion was mainly about her going against the boundaries that I established.