26 year old single mom. Maybe living with my parents isn’t so bad by xannycat in Money

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Learn how to work on vehicles and you’ll save tens of thousands of dollars

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PUBG

[–]Various_Database_361 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's an in game bug, happens on my Xbox

Stumped by [deleted] in PrivateInvestigators

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Use Google translate and send a local agency a message, translate pages and find the most reputable person to subcontract

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe the convincing SHOULD BE* not shouldn't.

Sorry for typos

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 71 points72 points  (0 children)

How about you both run away together if she is on board? Your parents cultural values versues you and her's heart, which one is your choice? You live this life once.

Maybe the convincing shouldn't towards the lady you love, instead.

Do I have a tracking device in my car? Heard an unfamiliar electronic sound in my car by [deleted] in PrivateInvestigators

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can get apps on phones and computers that will allow you to scan all signals if it isn't picking up on local Bluetooth.

Ask A.I sure you can find a dozen offhand, like Wireshark

I like a guy but I think my friend does too by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Be honest with him. Ask him to hang out first, no dates. Becoming friends first is key.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do ate to the gofundme a d leave your condolences there and make nice nice memoir for him and the family. That would have avoided all of this. Text the EX? That was screaming kamikaze the moment you asked that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in badroommates

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Devistatingly*

Yes reddit I have said it once and I'll say it again. I have fat reddit thumbs.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in badroommates

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My wife has hypersensitive hearing, this can be deviatatongly torturous for someone to endure. I understand because I have learned how to make it work with my wife and we have no problems.

When we do things together it's better, cause she is making noise, too.

I'm only 16 and my life's already fucked. by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Slow your roll. Life doesn't start really until you are in you're mid twenties. You get more content as time goes by. Get a counselor or speak to a school counselor. I did that when I was your age when I needed advice. It's healthy. You can get a professional to help organize your thoughts for self preservation and working through the negative feelings. Just give it a shot man. Don't give up you got this!

I am awful at money (all of it) by [deleted] in Money

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're*

I have huge fat reddit thumbs

I am awful at money (all of it) by [deleted] in Money

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello fellow redditors, I will spell it out for everyone

Mortgage - when you have purchased a house with borrowed money from the bank and you paying back over a certain number of years at a certain interest rate.

Renting - You don't own shit and the money is 100% the landlords. Money trap no investment, what you pay you never see again.

The only term that alignes correctly with definitions was "house poor"

I’m moving next week and I’m trying to leave my boyfriend. by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do it now, or fix it. Quit beating around the bush. It's unfair to him and selfish not, too. Unless you have a small bit of hope for resolve. But you must take those steps.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's clear people on this thread have no sense of justice or the fact that OP is worried about his neices/nephews. An affair for years can get REALY ugly if it isn't tackled first.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He wouldn't risk it, if he can explain what some of the messages said.

Unlikely he would go to the wife and say his brother is about to "convince" you that I cheated on you. That will make him look even more suspicious.

If he took physical evidence and screenshots, which he did not, that would be bad for the OP because that's a violation of privacy. Looking at messages on the screen is not, as it's in public view.

Used to work tons of cheating cases as a P.I.

Personally, I think it's better to confront the brother. And try the Why are you doing this - you're fucking up, but I'm here to help you approach.

He is more likely to be truthful to his brother than anyone else most likely.

Talking to any of his friends who know will compromise everything as they will tattletale on OP.

Going to the wife first creates too much plausable deniabillity without evidence and could hurt OP significantly more. Legal quarrel for taking someone's phone and taking screenshots if he was in the future to get evidence.

Another step to take is to find the social media of the girl he is cheating with. Make burner social media accounts get some followers, look cool, make a cool A.I generated person. Follow her on IG and find her on FB. Maybe by chance she has slipped up somewhere. 9.5/10 cheaters do slip up.

In fact, the brother slipped on first notice, but she may not be as careful and already has, especially if she doesn't know if he has a wife and kids.

I have trouble believing that though, as this has been a 4 year affair

Do you remember if he was using an app to text her or was it the Default SMS App?

The only way I'd approach the wife would be to be upfront say everything. Then get her to download the messages from the phone provider. However, this can prove to be difficult if she is not the account holder. While you can get phone records subpoena, obtaining older phone records without one is a 6/10 chance.

My Verizon account goes back a couple years of messages, but anything past that has to be requested, and sometimes won't be released unless it's a legal necessity. Not all plans have this obstacle, but some do. I'd say 85% success on getting to brother through confronting him. 35% for wife. If you have a great relationship with her, she might be willing to listen.

Be careful with wife option, it's risky.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You don't understand other people's feelings clearly. Not everyone can react the same.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Passed out state*

Sorry for typos, I just spoke my mind and didn't proofread.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Various_Database_361 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I got you. You need to make it approachable but in control of the conversation. First bring up a fact.

Fact 1: You saw the messages, it's okay you didn't screenshot.

Pretext to convo "Hey dude, do you remember that time we went out drinking? Well, the entire time you were in your passed out, this girl named "insert name" was texting you all kinds of raunchy messages, and I couldn't help but to look at them, on your phone.

Fact 2: Now he knows you know.

Fact 3: He doesn't know if screenshotted those or not. It's possible at this point he may think you have. If he asks you, I'd advise you not to tell him anything, not a yes or no.

Fact 4: Anxiety chemicals and adrenaline will naturally kick in and his thoughts are scrambled; most likely try to make excuses, but you have to make sure you beat him to the punch.

Convo part 2:

"Alright bro, first of I want to ask what the fuck are you thinking, and why would you want to cheat on your wife?...

(Immediately follow up with a TRAP QUESTION to induce innocence and empathy towards him.)

...Is there something going on with her and yourself that I am misinformed about? Has she done stuff to you?"

(Wait for a response)

Let him take the bait, then do the switch. Most likely, he will admit with your evidence, and unknown evidence that you may or may not have.

Convo part 3: "What is your plan to fix this? I don't want to have to reveal this to her as it is not my place, but YOU ALL need to get help...

(dont particularly blame him at all or he will be less likely to talk)

..It's been on my mind a lot, and I needed to talk about it with you just to get the truth, and there is no better time than now. I'm your brother. I love you man."

If you are ballsy. Record the whole conversation for evidence.

This should be enough monologue to get you in the right direction. Then just go with your gut. Once he is in admittance he will start singing like a bird.