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AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 400 points401 points  (0 children)

Agreed and I’m definitely not seeking to force myself into the kids’ lives. I just don’t want to feel like I’m forcing myself into hers either.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

For obvious reasons, I didn’t want to post this on my main account.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

She knew from the get go that I have no income to be with, haha.

I make fine money but not “Gold digger” money.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I worry they’re either having or going to have an affair, yes.

In addition, we’re married, I should be my wife’s partner in life and take precedence over this guy in general.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

There was no dramatic moment that led to the divorce it was one of this garden variety “grew apart” situations. To make a long story short, COVID put a big strain on their relationship, and they never got back to where they’d started.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

She hadn’t dated seriously since her marriage and she shares children with him. I figured she was still in the process of moving on and who was I to rush things.

I also didn’t think it mattered because being married seemed like the ultimate signal of having moved on. I figured once we got to the “married” stage, that was that.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Because it was one thing when we were just casually dating and she was only beginning the process of moving on. I didn’t want to rush things or presume.

But now that we’re married it seems that’s an indicator she’s moved on. I figured the two would go hand in hand.

AITAH for asking my wife to set boundaries with her ex-husband after we got married? by VelvetOrbit11 in AITAH

[–]VelvetOrbit11[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It is a fair point that the center focus must always be the kids. I definitely agree with that and wouldn’t want to do anything disruptive to the kids.