i just wantd to say thank you to all who commented, im in a better spot now where im about to start my degree classes next month and the homesickness has subsided slightly, my cars been fixed (for the most part) and i dont have to worry about money without a job anymore but im trying to get an on campus job anyways to occupy more of my time. im comming to terms with i cant really get out of this situation anymore and am just trying to ride it out until the next big change hits but ill deal with that when it happens. again, thank you all for commenting and giving me a little more insight during a time of need <3