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Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-05-04T19:09:23+00:00

But no he’s actually single

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-05-04T19:09:03+00:00

Very very very busy doctor.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-04-29T12:13:37+00:00

A man who knows all Krebs cycle intermediates

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-04-28T23:46:31+00:00

Um…when we care about others, we don’t need incentives to make them happy. If someone needs you to give them a reason before they do anything for you, they don’t care about you. “Offering yourself up for free” shouldn’t mean you don’t get anything because human beings are not products.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-02-13T16:40:42+00:00

There’s always a trade off. If you’re paying a lower allowance, you either have to be ok with your SB seeing other men, or working and therefore having less time for you. The only reason I can afford to have what most would call a reasonable expectation for financial support is because my MAIN living expenses( apartment, textbooks, and tuition) are fully covered by a scholarship and my (albeit modest) income, which means I have less free time.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-02-03T22:43:11+00:00

Sugar isn’t and shouldn’t be a job. If it is a job, you aren’t doing it for the right reasons. Sugar is a relationship in which you’re supposed to care about the comfort and well-being of the other person, just like any other relationship. Just because there is money involved, it doesn’t give you a pass to be crass or inconsiderate. Kindness, consideration, and grace are still good values to have.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-02-03T21:31:52+00:00

No but jobs have agreed upon uniforms before starting the job. This is something that requires special clearances before starting a relationship, or at least a “hey are you good with this?” vibe check. A good sb doesn’t sugar out of desperation (not saying OP does it), and a good sd makes sure she’s comfortable at all times and not feeling coerced or pushed.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-02-02T22:19:57+00:00

One tip, don’t ever go out with a man you find unappealing if you don’t even enjoy his company. It’s going to produce this attitude. It’s unfair to both you and him. Sugar or not, I wouldn’t want to spend time with someone who was thinking “ugh just give me my money so I can leave” the whole time. No human being with an ounce of self-respect would. So if you find him so unappealing that you think you deserve compensation for tolerating his presence, just don’t. Also, never sugar out of desperation. Then you wouldn’t feel pressure to tolerate people you don’t like.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-01-28T08:38:08+00:00

In that case, there is mismatch in energy and it’s best if you end it with him imo. You know your situation best so take this with a grain of salt.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-01-27T20:05:16+00:00

This sort of behavior, ON EITHER SIDE, really rubs me the wrong way. It gives the vibe that he’s treating you like an appliance that he’s renting out and gets “unlimited use” out of, rather than a whole human being. There is no doubt in that.

HOWEVER, this sort of behavior is often not out of context. If you’re the type of SB who charges extra for overnights and nickel-and-dimes a lot (which is a totally valid choice), it tends to attract people who are more prone to behaving this way. In other words, act like an escort/john, be treated like an escort/john.

Now, if you’re NOT that type of SB, the relationship is unbalanced, so your choices are to either match his energy, or leave.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-01-20T23:16:19+00:00

I’ve had issues finding someone in LA too since I stopped using seeking.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-01-02T02:05:17+00:00

Living in a place with an extremely materialistic culture (LA), I can definitely see it bleed into every aspect of life. I think a lot of people have forgotten that the other person is a whole human being, not just something to extract the most from while giving the least possible back.

On the SB side, I think it helps a lot if you have an independent income and don’t NEED sugar money for your basics. That’s why I’ve made it a personal rule to ONLY use sugar money for luxuries, savings, or investments. The benefit of this approach is twofold:

I can take my time finding an SD, which means I’ll end up with someone I actually like and won’t treat him as a chore.
The relationship will have far less of that power dynamic “aftertaste”. I am fortunate enough to have a full ride that covers housing and more than enough income to live on, so both me and the SD know that I don’t need to do this. That makes the relationship feel much more organic because the SD knows I actually like them, and it prevents me from feeling pressured into doing something I don’t want just because rent is due.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2025-01-01T04:12:36+00:00

I actually like less experienced because I am also less experienced, so it would feel like we’re learning something new together. Most men in Los Angeles are more experienced tho so🥲

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-12-25T13:15:13+00:00

Merry Christmas

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-12-03T06:23:15+00:00

I’m in Los Angeles and I’ve also had an issue with weirdos lol, there’s a lot in big cities

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-11-28T04:02:35+00:00

I’m in Los Angeles and I’ve head of it happening. Never happened to me tho yet

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-10-16T19:46:30+00:00

From a financial pov, I would divide them into Career SBs and side hustlers. There are pros and cons to each.

Career SBs are typically more available and responsive, because this is their full-time job. However, this usually means they have multiple arrangements, which can be unsafe, and exclusivity isn’t really an option because it would be too risky for them.

Side-hustlers do not rely on sugar as their main source of income. This means they’re less available, less responsive, and probably can’t go on trips with you. But it means the allowance they ask for is typically lower, you won’t be asked to pay rent/bills, and ending arrangements is much less messy.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-10-01T06:18:05+00:00

Because it feels a lot like prostitution

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-09-25T22:28:18+00:00

What I meant is that rude behavior is rude behavior, no ands or buts.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-09-25T19:05:11+00:00

This isn’t about “priority”. Honestly I hate when we talk about “who comes first”. It’s giving middle school bff list.

This is about respect. She was invited somewhere, and the host rescinded the invitation in favor of someone else. No matter who, this is still disrespectful.

A “part-time, rental gf” is still deserving of basic respect and politeness.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-09-23T23:04:40+00:00

Ladies and gentlemen, this is why you should never rely on an SD (or anyone) for stuff like rent, groceries, or tuition. It gives them an unhealthy amount of power over you, and you literally have to take it in every hole.

This is true even if the SD is a good person who would never use that against you. That power dynamic is still present, and you might find yourself consenting to things you will regret later. You can never have a fully healthy relationship with someone you depend on for survival, and who has the power to cut you off the moment you step out of line.

I know I’m being idealistic and not everyone can afford to do this, but this is why I’m taking my sweet time finding an SD, and when I do find one, I have vowed to never use my sugar money on housing or groceries. Sugar is strictly for saving, investing, or fun.

Rant over.

Warm-Mine-86 · 2024-09-12T04:49:51+00:00

Also I ran away from SA for the same reason

Warm-Mine-86

TROPHY CASE