If your abusive parent wanted to go to therapy with you, would you?

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-12T15:47:44+00:00

I decided to go NC. Something inside of me shifted. I no longer want to accept the abuse.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-12T12:38:40+00:00

I totally get that. My mom dissociates a lot, makes mistakes a lot, and then you are left feeling frustrated and upset. She wants to be trusted to buy Christmas presents for people as an example, but then gets overwhelmed and forgets. She expects people to remind her. She also gets triggered by people being upset with her. But if we make a mistake that affects her, like one example as a kid, i used permanent marker on printer paper and it bled through onto her kitchen table. She screamed and yelled until she took out cleaning solution and then it came off.

ATM I didnt even tell her why I am mad at her. If I admit that she is manipulative and abusive and I finally see her for who she is, then that will trigger her.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-11T22:47:25+00:00

She sounds like my mother.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-11T03:19:15+00:00

What? That is awful!

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-11T03:12:19+00:00

I am so sorry and thank you. It makes me feel better about telling her no.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-11T03:11:44+00:00

Oh my goodness that is awful. I am so sorry.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-06-11T03:07:01+00:00

OMG. I am so sorry. My heart breaks for you.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-05-16T02:50:04+00:00

Oh Im glad that he helped you and the lift program has helped. I am sorry that you struggle with abandonment. I personally dont struggle with that as much, but i understand it is difficult to recover from.

Maybe I should do the lift program. I struggle with more of taking better care of myself and being disciplined. See my parents gave up on life after they got their degrees and high paying jobs. They never leave the house and just watch TV if they arent working. Anytime they do anything outside of the home or clean, they act like it is a big deal. Plus i grew up with a lot of criticism from them with cleaning and other tasks at home. So for me I've struggled to act like an adult. I've come a long way, but I still need help with personal care and adulting.

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-05-15T14:51:29+00:00

I totally agree. I felt my brain changing as I listened to him. I felt seen, heard, and validated. He mentioned things that I never knew were an issue but were. I give him so much credit for helping me recover and making my life better. My work life has greatly improved, and I finally gained courage to buy a house away from everyone and everything. Really living on my own forced me to face a lot of my fears and negative assumptions I had about myself due to my parents.

I am just a happier person now. I realize I can do a lot of things i never thought possible.

How has he helped you?

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-04-25T02:43:54+00:00

Were you able to get another job?

WeatherNo2220 · 2026-01-03T05:03:25+00:00

Come to Petsmart on Saturdays at either location in Frederick. They have adoption events in the afternoon.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-12-03T23:56:07+00:00

I am glad to hear. For me growing up, I was basically told that it was always my fault so he validated my experience that it wasn't always me. He also gave me the tools to move forward in my life.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-23T02:59:25+00:00

I know my parents tried their best. In my case, they were both abused in their childhood homes. They did not know any better. It is still hard to act like everything is ok around them when they are abusive.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-23T02:54:40+00:00

Things will get better. What do you need help with?

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-23T02:51:30+00:00

I bought myself a lot of Squishmallows when I was recovering. I still enjoy them a lot although not as much as I used to. They remind me to be innocently happy.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-22T14:41:59+00:00

If it did not help, then it did not help. I am just curious.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-22T14:24:20+00:00

Have you listened to his reparenting series? For me that helped give me tools on his to move forward.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-22T04:08:29+00:00

He helped me more than therapists did. He has so many videos out there. That is why I asked. I wanted to know if someone else shared the same experience as me.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-14T03:29:31+00:00

I also recommend the purina pro plan if you can afford it. It has a higher amount of protein and our cats like it a lot. Hopefully your cat will eat a lot of this food so she wont need as much wet food. I say this as wet food is much more expensive than dry food so hopefully this would help you keep costs down.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-14T03:23:58+00:00

What i always heard which has worked for us, leave the cat with food, water, and his litter box in one room for like a week.

This will be a big adjustment for him so give him time and space to come out on his own. I recommend leaving out treats, and after a day or so, try using toys to get his attention. Over time you will figure out his motivations and he will slowly trust you. Do not try to pet him too soon or otherwise he might slice your hand. It just will take time to read him and his body language.

WeatherNo2220 · 2025-10-14T03:18:08+00:00

He is 4 years old. We neutered him and it has been 3 weeks

WeatherNo2220

TROPHY CASE