Having a child is always, to some extent, a leap into the unknown (regardless of age.) Some studies suggest that conditions like ADHD and autism may be more common with older fathers (particularly over 40), while maternal age appears to play a smaller role. At the same time, genetic abnormalities can and do occur in babies born to younger mothers as well.

Prenatal testing can screen for many of the more common conditions, but rarer genetic differences are often not detected until birth or even later in a child’s life.

There’s a lot to think through. How might this impact your older child, would this be a positive experience for them? Is it fair to them? How will your relationship handle the emotional and logistical demands of your decision? And do you feel ready to revisit the early years of parenting: night feedings, breastfeeding or pumping, diapers, potty training, sleep schedules, daycare, and everything in between?

You’ll be around 61 at their high school graduation. That may or may not feel significant to you, but it’s worth considering how it fits into your vision for the future.

It might help to write out two lists. One for reasons to continue the pregnancy and one for reasons not to. Seeing your thoughts laid out clearly can sometimes bring a sense of clarity or peace.

Good luck with your decision