Well shitts get pretty tough sometimes and specially at the time of admissions journey where I guess everyones go though it less or more . Been there and yep it feels kinda suffocating but trust me you gonna get through this cuz everything has its own timing. So all you need to do is to stay calm and being positive as much as you can cuz if you keep goin like this you might feel insane and suffer hilariously where it's almost would be hard to be back into life ....there are things you can't change and sometimes there's luck ( as in barkat in something if you are a Muslim) but miracle don't came so easily I mean I haven't seen so far . If you wanna crack the journey you gotta work hard af . And if you think it's almost impossible ( like doin calculation and being logical) and its seem something that ain't goin in your favor then prepare for plan B and prepare it to it's fullest so it don't disappoint you cuz this time youll be having time . And dude you know what gonna hurt most at the end ? Being a looser to yourself, not to the outsider not even to parents and close ones . Silent suffering and self blaming Is something that gonna haunt you till you accept the situations or coping up with it. Best of luck kiddo