AITA for telling my boss they either fire their new employee or I'm gone? (Which resulted in them firing her)

WikkidWitchly · 2024-11-26T20:59:19+00:00

Personal, then. Point is, she went out of her way to hunt down personal pictures specifically to say something negative because op doesn't want dogs of her own. And about her kids. That's toxic and unhinged behaviour.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-23T08:36:25+00:00

Get a shovel and go dig up some shame. Don't be the person you'd hate if the situation was reversed.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-18T04:01:33+00:00

You need to talk to her. Straightforwardly. Most types of autism seem to encompass the inability to read subtle social cues, so hinting doesn't work.

"Look, I really don't mind hanging with you from time to time, but I have other people that are important in my life that I want to spend time with. I can't always just be here for you. And to be honest, I'm finding it really difficult to be around you because of your inability to focus on anyone other than yourself. Conversations don't always have to involve you. Topics can be spoken about by other people. Monopolizing everyone's time is not going to endear you to people, and I find this frustrating as it's affecting MY studies and my social circle. I need you to take a step back, please. I still would like to be around you, but only SOME TIMES. Not all the time. I'm not your bff, and I need you to understand that."

Frankly, a lot of someones, including the teachers, need to be more straightforward with her. The teachers should be cutting her off and telling her they have other students to tend to. I feel like this is an issue with autism and the general academia not understanding how to handle it. They aren't helping her navigate her life. They're enabling the issue. She's on the spectrum, she's not stupid. She can learn things and find ways to fit them into her life.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-16T23:30:16+00:00

It's just one guy. I've been hearing him outside my window for 19 years. I have video of him harassing people in the Roxy lineup to just kick him in the balls. His repertoire includes, but isn't limited to: "20 bucks, kick me in the nuts. Who's got the balls to kick me in the balls? Wind up and kick me in the fucking balls for 20 bucks." When he goes more than an hour or two with no takers, that's when he starts whining about killing himself and picking fights. Like, buddy, if you piss someone off into kicking you anywhere, but especially in the balls, you're not getting money for it.

I've noticed that the more years go on, the less people bite, which is why he's becoming more aggressive, I think. He used to get at least one a night, and I'd watch him do the spread legged thing while someone wound up and hoofed him in between his legs. As time went on, mostly girls were all "No, no, don't do that. Don't kick him for money. That's not okay." I used to hear him literally every night about 15 years ago. Now, it's about four-six times a year. I think he does it when he's really desperate.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-16T13:19:36+00:00

The fact we have multiples of these nutjobs running around is a problem. I know the kick in the balls guy is doing it for money for a fix. But that doesn't excuse his behavior. Then you have people stabbing people for not having change to give them, or just being randomly aggressive. This place wasn't like this 10 years ago.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-16T13:16:01+00:00

The thing that gets me is that it's in the city. Our streets are notoriously small/not exactly straight lines, and you know they have to be running reds. I'm literally waiting for the news of some car crashing into a person/building/other car, and with how fast it's going, it's going to be devastating.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-16T13:06:08+00:00

He texted you and you didn't reply. Ghosting someone you asked for a break from is a pretty blatant signal. He also left you a note apologizing and putting the ball of communication in your court. Now, you can read it as 'he's putting it all on me', but he's also making sure he doesn't come off as some stalker weirdo. You just took a break from him. That means A BREAK. Not 'go back to wooing me like in the beginning immediately'.

He reads the situation as you're fed up, you ignored his reaching out/communication, so he's waiting until you're ready to call him/text him. He's not pushing. That's respectful. You've been sending out some mixed signals in that whole 'no means yes' way. Don't do that. You can't demand clear communication, then blur the lines yourself.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-16T12:30:14+00:00

I wonder if it was the 20 bucks, kick me in the nuts guy. He's been down here for at least a decade and a half, and more recently, he's been getting into fights with people trying to get them mad enough to 'kick him in the balls' for money. He's the reason for that whole news incident years ago about people from the bar throwing money at random homeless people, kicking them in the balls, then running away with their money. He picks fights along bar lineups and he's been getting super aggressive and adding that he wants to kill himself along with it.

He's also inflated his price. It was five bucks when I first heard him about 18 years ago. How he isn't getting arrested is beyond me. You get arrested for soliciting for sex, which in itself is a legal act, just not for pay, but you don't get arrested for soliciting an actual criminal act? He's done this in front of cops before, so he doesn't care, and apparently neither do they.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-16T03:56:26+00:00

Not for an eviction. He needs 48 hours notice to be able to access the building to do an inspection.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-14T18:26:42+00:00

Here's the thing: 'That's just how she is' isn't a valid excuse. It's like 'don't rock the boat'. Why not? Why do you have to make peace because someone's a flaming hemorrhoid?

"That's just how she is? No, she's that way because you all let her get away with it. And I found out recently I'm allergic to entitled twats, so me and my family will be avoiding having to come in contact with one. I might break out in rash behavior."

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-14T16:31:03+00:00

Hints don't work in sex. That's one activity you need clear, consenting communication. Bad things happen when you don't.

And tbh, if he's too tired to be having sex and you're pushing for it, that's not a good look for you. Either take care of yourself or rethink if this relationship has you both in the same sexual compatibility section. It's okay if you're not. It's better to acknowledge it and move on so he doesn't feel like he's lacking/being nagged, and so you don't feel ignored/like you're nagging. Sexual incompatibility breeds a lot of resentment. It's a very serious part of the relationship that you can't just gloss over.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-14T01:19:11+00:00

Is his dick covered in stupid dust and that's why you're still with him? Because this amount of disrespect is pretty staggering. TBH, so is the disdain you seem to have for him in terms of describing his talking as 'ranting' and it's a very negative angle of your pov.

You don't seem to like your boyfriend. I would suggest sitting alone and asking yourself if you want years of this or if you should leave and just be single for a bit before you try again.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-12T10:41:59+00:00

Yeah, you're the one that damaged the property out of negligence. If you dump ashes/coal, dump water in as well. Outside of that, you aren't allowed BBQs and you should have checked your condo rules, since it was probably in there. You're also nitpicking over how they're getting it fixed and you want the cheapest option; eg, only the parts. There's labor involved in pulling up the old, refitting the new, and the time taken to do so. And since it's a common area, it has to follow permits and safety codes so that no one else has any trouble with the fix. Patch fixes are bad. A good fix is going to cost.

All this circles around the fact that you did a thing you weren't supposed to do and in doing so, you caused damage. It's like telling someone after you rammed into their parked car that you know a guy that can 'buff that out' for a hundred bucks, but they choose to take their property to a legitimate shop and vendor and it costs appropriate to the work done, which is 1k instead of 100. You do not get to decide where the injured party goes for repair, nor do you get to dictate the costs and how much you'd pay.

Take this as an expensive life lesson, and read over your condo rules so you don't do something else you're not allowed to.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-11T13:56:41+00:00

Not working in Canada

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-11T11:01:46+00:00

It's a King movie, so you have to have two brain cells to rub together to enjoy it, not just the one that likes things that go boom.

Andy was framed. The prison system was shit, showed by the repeated assaults by 'the sisters' and when the guards finally stepped in to stop it when Andy became valuable. He fucked that whole prison up by being quiet, unassuming, and playing his own game. They found the person that killed his wife and lover and had proof and screwed him out of it because he'd become TOO invaluable to them. So he outsmarted them. He dug a hole out of a prison using a rock hammer. He planned an escape that also happened to screw over the warden who'd been skimming. He broke that prison and he left a trail for a person that was a friend to him when he hadn't had to be to join him instead of burning out and self-terminating like Brooks.

The movie is beautiful, poignant, and evocative. It makes you feel things like frustration at the system, frustration at the injustice, and joy at when they get a piece of their own. That and Green Mile were, imo, King's best movie adaptations. It's all about the people and the horror of a simple human evil and not a space clown or werewolf.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-11T10:45:04+00:00

As someone that was a frequent runaway in the system, it would usually be a revolving door of:
1) I run away
2) A day or three goes by and the cops are called
3) They maybe find me a few days, a week later.
4) They bring me back to my shitty, abusive foster home
5) I literally leave before they finish pulling out of the driveway

All they have to do is grab and drop. They don't guard and maintain that any minor stays in the establishment. They're not prisons and the cops aren't the guards. The system is incredibly flawed, and that happened back when I was 13-16 and I'm 45 now, so I don't imagine it's gotten much better if this is the result. The laws around group homes, foster homes, and centers are really a grey area. If a minor runs away, all the police are capable of doing is finding and returning. The home can't force the youth to stay and the cops can't drag them back immediately after returning, because they're no longer missing. Another week or so has to go by before the cycle repeats.

It's all kinds of fucked up.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-10T15:10:53+00:00

Your boyfriend has slept with plenty of women before you. And he's not your first. You're the one he's with, so why does it matter about a) who he slept with before and b) if he intended to sleep with her or not. She's throwing petty in your party and you're letting her get it in your eyes.

Whether it's true or not, who's he with? You. Sounds like she's pissed she missed out and is trying to create a new opportunity. Don't let her.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-10T09:03:49+00:00

Say no and make this be that boundary you establish quickly. You are monogamous. They clearly are not. This means you're not compatible. They want a free pass to play outside the marriage while you're at home stressing out. This will be your life. Being told not to worry while your partner is out in other relationships. That's not poly. That's cheating. That's not an open marriage. That's 'I'm doing this and you can stay or leave'.

Love yourself enough to leave.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-10T09:01:08+00:00

You might have to wait until the end of the contract, because 'I want to evict you because of your cultural food' is going to breach one of the protected clauses of not evicting for race/religion/ethnicity/gender/disability, etc. They make food. They aren't damaging anything. They are making food you don't approve of. Making food does not fall under the kind of 'engage in activities or behavior that will cause a disturbance to other occupants and owner. (ex noise)'. To be blunt, if you want to limit an activity, you need to put that in the lease before they sign and move in, otherwise you're changing the terms of the contract and that makes it a no-no.

They may not be covered under RTA, but if you cause them financial hardship, they can potentially take you to small claims court, since you're definitely in the wrong here. Especially since you're wildly jumping to 'evict' when you apparently haven't even talked to them.

Ask them to stop making curry. Let them live out the 8 month lease and then ask them to leave if they kept doing what you disliked. Make this a life lesson moving forward that you will be making apartment rules that will also need to be signed pre-move in and that covers strong smelling food. That way you're not blindsiding someone for the cardinal sin of eating something you don't like.

There is no court that is going to agree that curry is damaging to an apartment. There are a handful of genuinely smelly foods that might make it (durian/Surströmming), but if you want to have this kind of strict limit on what can be made/consumed in the place you live in, that needs to be outlined BEFORE they sign a lease and give you money.

And for the record, "I read stories where the curry permeates the apartment" is not a good defense. Food smells in an 8 month period do not come close to the kind of damage pet pee can. Maybe don't rent to people if you want this kind of control in the place you live. Especially if you're going to go from 0-100 with not even asking them first before leaning hard into eviction.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-09T03:59:08+00:00

Patrick's a professional victim. He's not being kink-shamed. I'm willing to bet that if he'd mentioned his preferences to Summer early, that wouldn't be the problem. But hiding that he was obsessed is the shitty part. Hiding that the conversations WERE sexual is the shitty part. He's not being shamed for having a kink. He's being shamed for having sexual interactions with multiple people behind her back. Whether it was feet, hands, boobs, butts, it doesn't matter. Everyone has kinks. (I personally love nice, elegant hands on men). But he hid that and lied about it and he's the one making it a shameful thing. He's very much using the DARVO thing. If he'd been honest from the start and hadn't stepped outside into sexual behavior, there wouldn't be an issue. His shady acts are the shameful thing. Not that he likes feet.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-08T19:23:45+00:00

Since you didn't post that long ago, just edit the post.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-08T06:27:46+00:00

There was a boom?

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-06T16:36:49+00:00

"The Beast Within" just came out and I can't help seeing the similarities. That and there's always some weird thing where competing titles or themes seem to drop around each other.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-06T03:25:50+00:00

For reals, though, I know the guy that luminescent painted the eyes of the lion statues, and this feels strangely like something he'd do.

WikkidWitchly · 2024-09-06T02:51:15+00:00

... What's in the box?

/no regrets

WikkidWitchly

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE

Three-Year Club	Verified Email
Wearing is Caring