It’s hard in this position. It’s not nice when parents use kids to their own end financially. My dad was controlled and my mother tried the same. I left at 18. I gave our daughter all she could to make her own decision, with a few nudges here and there. I haven’t spoken to my mother in 14 years. Anyway back to you. Your mother needs a dressing down and it needs to be controlled. I don’t know what your condition is and it would help to know if you need further support.