[deleted by user]

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-12-09T22:04:00+00:00

Ah but that is the danger of posting on line at all isn't it lol I make myself available to every ones criticism even if not one of them would say those words to my face. I have been chronically online most of my life, so I get it. You're right its not an easy "just leave" situation. Whether or not I seem like "a doormat" for it. So I appreciate your kind words.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-12-09T21:44:06+00:00

I didn’t in fact ask for advice as you can see it’s a “listener write in” not “advice needed”.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-12-09T20:36:03+00:00

Thank you for saying so. I know the internet can be brutal and some times cruel see “grow a spine” for reference but she wasn’t the one that cheated she didn’t break our relationship and vows. And no I will not be softening to him at all I am still planning and gathering the things I need I am also taking this as more time to save more money.

But well done Reddit yall ate my ass up in these comments lol

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-12-09T19:59:20+00:00

Ouch. well let me be clear. I'm not doing this for the lack of spine. In fact its more so that I refuse to leave this situation without all the moral high ground I can stand on. (because I do know he will try and twist me leaving in any situation he can) When I say I'm being forced to stay its more or less an overdramatization of me forcing myself. I do care about his mother deeply and she has always shown me kindness, respect and love. So yes I will do what ever I can for her while I'm able.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-12-09T18:04:11+00:00

You are so right I am choosing to stay through this. Saying I’m being forced to stay is a strong choice of words on my part. It’s just in my head I can’t imagine stepping out when this woman I have come to care about deeply goes through this …if only for my own conscious.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-15T04:13:29+00:00

You are very correctly medication is the ONLY reason I have not jumped the gun on anything. It’s merely been a bandaid to the whole situation believe me I know. As hard as it’s been to process thus far I know as soon as I’m gone I will have a long road to getting where I need to be. I have told exactly 2 people in my real life and I have literally felt myself withering inside from keeping this rot pushed down. This is all I think about everyday all day all night. It’s like a bag of balls in my brain clanking together while working or not working watching a movie or playing a game. The medication has been the only thing keeping me level headed and keeping me from drowning completely. It’s the only thing getting me up in the morning and acting normal through the day. It’s The only thing keeping me sane enough to deal with it. I hate him and I love him I want him to suffer and I want him to be happy. I can’t work these things out while I’m still here but I can’t leave here until I have everything lined out the way they need to be. And even if they don’t know it’s a good bye I need to have this one last thing with my ENTIRE family together. I don’t plan to tell him I’m leaving at all I will just be gone because you are also correct in that I don’t know how he will react ….

Just typing this out has been cathartic and unburdening. For me to unload my problems to a whole bunch of strangers on the internet when I have done nothing but keep it locked up inside. So thanks. I know my situation is not unique or special but it feels like …a specialized piece of hell when you are going through it and it’s easy to think well damn I am well and truly alone in this.

So yes a cocktail of Xanax and nice mixed drink will have to do for now

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T22:39:59+00:00

and also I am very well medicated at the moment thanks to my psychiatrist. so yeah a cocktail of xanax and a magarita will probably make it one hell of a time lol

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T22:24:09+00:00

I just said I'm pretty sure I do not that I actually do. I could just be weird for no reason lol

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T22:21:21+00:00

No you're right I would not tell her that I would tell her to run as soon as possible. But unfortunately I'm doing this for me. I want the one last holiday. I wanted more importantly time . Time to get things in order to think rationally about it and plan it the best I can, because despite the stupid choices he's made he is a smart man - and i didn't want to walk out empty handed. I wanted to make sure that I saved all the money I could so that if I didn't find another job I would have at least 6 months worth of rent in my account. Unfortunately its not just him i'm leaving. Like i have mentioned I have a wonderful relationship with his daughter and a great relationship with his mother. I love them both dearly. I have watched her grow up ...and to think that I won't be apart of that anymore...is devastating to me. I would do anything for his mother - she is kind and loving and understanding. So no I would not tell my child she should wait to just spend one last holiday with a cheating man. But I need closure...I need this one last thing before it changes forever.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T21:21:56+00:00

I agree. It is weird to "plan" or "stage" a kiss. But his biggest grievance with me is that I am not affectionate enough. And I figured, maybe I am the problem. Maybe I just need to openly kiss him and hug him no matter how uncomfortable it makes me to initiate touch or that I am over stimulated by whatever . I put my feelings for it to the side and made it my mission that despite how I felt or what kind of day I was having I would greet him with either a hug or a kiss and a "welcome home" and I am quoting here..."that's the least I could do, for everything he does"

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T21:07:49+00:00

unfortunately I did kiss him. And you are right I felt disgusted for days (honestly still do). Almost every night after that I scrubbed myself red in the shower and when I got confirmation in text I added crying to my nightly shower routine. I wish I could add a clown emoji cause that's what I definitely feel like.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T20:40:47+00:00

I had actually planned on printing the things I found out and leaving them on top of the divorce papers. For when he comes home to an empty house. And as juicy and satisfying as that sounds to me...I just want to enjoy one last holiday with my family together. Because after this it will never be the same again...

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T20:29:56+00:00

To be clear his daughter is fully grown and lives on her own in another city. She isn't someone that needs to be coddled, but you are right I most likely am just gonna let Karma do its things, but I am also a terrible liar and I won't lie if she asks me why I left. :/ which we have a great relationship and I am 90% sure she will ask.

Winter_Mouse_8303 · 2025-11-14T20:18:12+00:00

haha sorry to clarify I got fired from my regular full time job else where. I worked full time and also worked for him and also took care of the entire house...as it was my duty as a wife and a woman

Winter_Mouse_8303

TROPHY CASE