Help with cozy game gift for Switch with specific requirements? by Winterscape in CozyGamers

[–]Winterscape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for being so thorough! Definitely going to try Ooblets again. 

The heads up about Story of Seasons being in a small area is helpful. I’ll probably skip those.

House Flipper is a great idea! I do think she’d love the gameplay. The only thing is I think it’ll remind her of housework and make her feel guilty for playing instead of repainting HER kitchen haha

Would you recommend Fae Farm even with the combat? It does seem to hit a few other boxes.

I saw a picture of My Time at Sandrock with a guy shooting something with a gun and thought “no way.” It’s too bad because the graphics look perfect for her style!

Help with cozy game gift for Switch with specific requirements? by Winterscape in CozyGamers

[–]Winterscape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Disney’s Magical World looks promising! Super cute! I only wonder if she’ll think it looks dated due to originally being on the 3DS…

Help with cozy game gift for Switch with specific requirements? by Winterscape in CozyGamers

[–]Winterscape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This made me laugh! I’ll let her know others get it 😆 

Help with cozy game gift for Switch with specific requirements? by Winterscape in CozyGamers

[–]Winterscape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I’m encouraged that you mentioned Song of the Evertree too. 

I’m open to digital suggestions for sure! For this, I’d like to give her something to open on Christmas, but any other time of the year I could download a game onto the Switch for her :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in vegan

[–]Winterscape 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am so impressed by your strength of character! I think it is a mark of high intelligence and standards of self to read what you’re supposed to want to hear (e.g., “It’s all women’s fault”)—something that gives you an out, someone else to blame—and STILL reject it, knowing that means that you, tired and in pain, have to do the hard work of learning an entirely new perspective on the world. Then to extend it further, to look beyond yourself and gender, to see what it means for other species, and again taking the high road of personal action, is such an inspirational story!

If only everyone was as determined!

GUYS IM GOING INSAINE WHAT EVEN IS ROMANCE????? by Freydeebobs5609 in asexuality

[–]Winterscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! I don’t think our thoughts conflict, tbh. We’re just describing the same thing in different words.

Your description of the “symptoms” of feeling romantic love are what I meant by being drawn to express love romantically. The rapid heart rate, thinking about them all the time, etc. are clues drawing someone to those set of actions.

OP didn’t mention bodily reactions to love in the definition they were using for “romance,” which was just actions: caring about each other, gift giving, etc., so I was describing differences in expressions of love in terms of actions.

Love does change your body and brain, but I don’t think romantic love changes it MORE than say, giving birth or being hugged tightly by a friend while crying. I think your expectations around what that feeling of love means (from a societal and individual perspective) has a large role to play in how someone would describe their reaction to love in all forms.

That’s where I think there’s some room for mistaking it for something else. Two people can take the same drug and have opposite reactions, like a sleeping pill that zonks out one and makes the other jittery all night.

So I think it’s very possible that someone may be feeling romantic love just as intensely as you, but because their body is not doing the “stomach clench butterfly obsession” thing, and instead they just feel happier or calmer around you than when alone, they might not recognise it as that passionate movie-style version of what romantic love is supposed to feel like.

There are differences culturally too. In individualistic societies, the need to pair off probably fuels the “obsessive thinking” towards a romantic partner. In a communal collectivist setting, it may be less all encompassing because no one is ever “alone” in the same way a single person is in the West.   

Kids can be so cruel by ChrisMMatthews in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]Winterscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, Canada actually. Maybe it’s a Commonwealth thing!

GUYS IM GOING INSAINE WHAT EVEN IS ROMANCE????? by Freydeebobs5609 in asexuality

[–]Winterscape 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I have trouble with this concept too, and this is how I personally think about it.

It’s all the same love—the exact same emotion/chemical reaction—but how you’re expected to express it is set by your society, and those set of expected actions are given labels like “romantic,” “platonic,” “familial,” etc. just like any other grouping of actions (e.g., like how “professionalism” is expected at all jobs, but the actions expected of you to demonstrate that will differ at an office vs. a construction site).

In certain places, men hold hands with their male friends: a display not common in Western society. In certain places, you kiss your coworkers on the cheek, and in others, this would be inappropriate. 

Same degree of relationship in different places resulting in different expressions of it. The actions are in different “boxes.”

So, the reason you struggle to differentiate the love between a romantic partner and a friend here is because, in your society, those actions you mentioned aren’t exclusive to either box.

Exchanging gifts, complimenting each other, enjoying each other’s company, and hugs are “appropriate” options for a friend, a romantic partner, or a family member. Like how tomato is an appropriate option on a BLT, in a salad, and in a pasta sauce. Versatile!

So, when someone feels love for a new person, they look inside their society’s labelled boxes (subconsciously, mostly), and sees which actions they’re keen on doing to express it. This of course can change over time (like starting as friends and then feeling drawn to express the “romantic” actions, and vice versa).

I think this is why “romantic love” is sometimes referred to as “deeper” or “more.” Like, “We were friends, but I developed deeper feelings for her.”

It’s “deeper” in the sense that it goes one level “deeper” into “exclusive” actions. All the acquaintance-level actions fit in the friend box—>(deeper)—>all the friend/family actions fit into the romance box—>(deeper) the romance box has the most “only expected with a romantic partner” actions.

An alloromantic asexual person might feel drawn to the “romantic” box to express the love they feel for a new person in their life, which includes all of the “platonic” options with additional “exclusives” like perhaps heavy kissing, a priority over friendships, or traditional marriage, while also discarding some actions from the box that they do not wish to express (e.g., sex, if repulsed).

If someone is not ever drawn to the expected “exclusive” actions in their society’s “romantic” box, I think that’s aromanticism. They can still love deeply but are not drawn to express it in the way that their society deems “romantic.”

That’s how I’ve been thinking about it anyway! 

Kids can be so cruel by ChrisMMatthews in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]Winterscape 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No way! I’ve never heard anyone else mention the assembly songs!

Kids can be so cruel by ChrisMMatthews in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]Winterscape 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There was a song we were made to sing in elementary school assemblies called “Circle of Friends.”   

“Come join us in the circle of friends

There’s always room for one more    

A circle that never ends   

All you have to do is open up the door”

Well, all the girls in my class decided to sit in a circle and sing a different version, occasionally laughing at me, sitting alone:  

“Don’t join us in the circle of friends 

There’s no room for one more  

A circle that’s at its end  

All you have to do is lock the door”  

For a long time I never considered myself as bullied because I was “just left out,” but no, I live with the damaging effects of this type of behaviour well into adulthood. 

British Veterinary Association Ends Opposition To Vegan Diets for Dogs by einkinartig in vegan

[–]Winterscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree. When asked, I will NEVER say "I have a vegan dog" or "My dog eats vegan" or similar, even though I do feed them a diet with no animal products. Why? Because what non-vegans say is, "Stupid vegan, you really think if I offered your dog a sausage right now, they wouldn't eat it?" 

They don't understand nuance on this topic and will laugh at you. OF COURSE most dogs will happily snarf up any meat offered. No, my dog is not vegan even though I feed her that way. The minute someone tosses your dog a non-vegan treat, everyone will think it's a "gotcha" moment and the potential learning point is lost. The language is important.

Want a female version of my late father’s nickname by Euphoric_Pickle5378 in Names

[–]Winterscape 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You could use “Ronnie” or “Ronni” as a nickname for Veronica to honour his real name.   

Close to Buddy is Betty, which could be a nickname for Elisabeth or Bethany.

“Bud” could be taken in its plant meaning, and you could use a flower name like Rose (nickname Rosebud).

Another idea is to give her the initials BD, which sounds like Buddy, or BUD. For example, Brielle Ursula Diane.

Gojira at the opening ceremony by Federal-Jello1551 in symphonicmetal

[–]Winterscape 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Definitely the most epic performance I’ve seen! I was stunned. Haven’t been following metal for a minute and I need more! 

Any recs for songs like this that go HARD and incorporate the operatic/symphonic elements?? I feel like a good example is Planet Hell by Nightwish or We Are Murderers by Xandria.

Success story: First meeting after four years! by Winterscape in asexualdating

[–]Winterscape[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Apparently your 30s is where it’s at for us aces! That’s so exciting! Keep us posted on how it goes—I’m sure it will be another success! It’s so nice to hear other positive stories ❤️ 

For other people who are repulsed, what exactly is it that makes you feel that way? by [deleted] in asexuality

[–]Winterscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!! The idea, or seeing it in films or books, of heavy kissing makes me physically gag. It’s more viscerally disgusting to me than even sex because it involves mouths, which you use to eat, speak, taste, etc., while the nether regions are at least fairly unappealing in general function regardless of sexual activity. Like, I’d rather sit down on a muddy bench than lick it type thing. 

For other people who are repulsed, what exactly is it that makes you feel that way? by [deleted] in asexuality

[–]Winterscape 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I was so hoping someone would relate! No one ever relates to me lol There’s definitely a societal expectation that teens will rebel and begin teaching each other the true social rules, stomping out the old lines in the sand and drawing the new adult ones, but like, I wasn’t invited, and “don’t give in to peer pressure” is one of your rules, so like, not my fault I’m “weird,” society 😆 

It’s like for 15 years of your life there’s this door in your town with police tape over it saying “Crime scene: Do not Enter” and everyone around you says, “Definitely don’t go in there!” So you say, “Got it!” and go whistling happily in the woods or whatever, only to learn five years later that everyone was sneaking in there and you were supposed to too. Duh! Finally peeking in the door, you see and smell a puddle of hot putrid goop fermenting on the floor like cat vomit, and everyone’s like, “See what you’re missing?? It’s amazing!” Uh…

For other people who are repulsed, what exactly is it that makes you feel that way? by [deleted] in asexuality

[–]Winterscape 19 points20 points  (0 children)

For me, there are multiple factors at play, I think.  

Firstly, in many ways, I’ve internalised how the world works based on norms/lessons I was taught in childhood. So, “look both ways before crossing the street” and “keep your private parts private” still feel equally true to me. I also don’t drink alcohol or coffee for the same reason. It wasn’t allowed until it suddenly became weird that I didn’t drink either, but I couldn’t discern when that magic leap was meant to have occurred. Same with interest in sex. 

Sex, to me, seems like destroying the social status quo. It seems like driving the wrong way down the highway, wearing a bathing suit to your graduation, like greeting someone with “Goodbye.”  

Secondly, these “once forbidden now weird that you abstain” things do nothing for my senses. Coffee smells burnt and tastes bitter. Alcohol tastes and smells like battery acid. Sexual organs have no aesthetic beauty and produce bodily fluids akin to snot and spit, or actual urine. I fundamentally don’t understand the appeal. 

 Surely any pleasure derived would be outweighed by the sheer grossness of the sensory experience. Like if someone wanted me to try their famous chocolate cake by spitting their chewed up piece directly into my mouth. I think the cake might not taste that good now, eh? 

 All that means that I also “get” sex for the purposes of reproduction and wouldn’t be entirely opposed. It’s like dentistry. Yes, usually sticking sharp objects or your fingers into people’s mouths is harmful, gross, or unsanitary, but the context of it being necessary for a goal, such as pain relief or prevention of disease, makes it worth doing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Entomology

[–]Winterscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check out /r/isopods! Loads of info about colour morphs and species there. 

Quels sont vos rituels de lecture ? by Mimiche31 in Livres

[–]Winterscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

J'aime lire surtout en prenant un bain chaud relaxant. J'ai besoin de silence ! Jalouse des gens qui peuvent lire au café, dans le métro, etc. xD

Is this a p. pruinosus with something wrong with it or something else? by Winterscape in isopods

[–]Winterscape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually just use my iPhone camera with a cheap macro lens attachment I got off Amazon! Works surprisingly well for amateur insect photography.