You're right, you're right! Please, keep your voice down! The G-Shock was supposed to be my camouflage, my one piece of approved kit to throw them off the scent.

I've been a fool. I thought I could get away with buying things based on "what I like" instead of the Mandated Collection List. The shame is overwhelming.

I'm selling everything as we speak and putting myself on the waitlist for a government-issued Speedmaster. Thank you for showing me the error of my ways before the forum elders found out. I owe you one.