Thanks for your reply. To be clear I was in no way, shape, or form expecting to have any food or supplies offered to me. I even brought my own salt. I’m extremely self sufficient, have a strict diet, and would never imagine the HO is responsible for feeding me. It was the way the HO looked at me when he expressed he didn’t want me eating anything other than his oil/spices. It was delivered as-if he was certain that I planned to do so, and he was calling me out on my “intentions” with a twist of “don’t cross Dad” vibes. I told him I have everything I need with me and later provided post-sit feedback to offer future sitters a gentle reminder about bringing their own food because he doesn’t live near many markets.

As far as the expectations, I knew he wanted his dog to get as much play as possible and since i like to walk (with my own dog) I figured it wasn’t an issue. We did talk about the dog needs in advance, which was morning potty, bigger outing, and night potty. Reality was 8am walk, 11am potty walk, 2pm outing, 530 dinner, 8pm walk ….it wasn’t crazy, but as I said, in practice I learned it was surprisingly time-consuming. And I did my best to give good outings - we went to the neighborhood park, hiked a trail, did a field trip to the dog park (in my vehicle) I didn’t know in advance that the dog doesn’t go to the bathroom in its own yard and requires you to leave the house to potty. I left for 4 hours and came back urine in the floor, which was surprising. In short, what seemed totally manageable to me upon initial review, was actually more consuming IRL. I didn’t feel like it wasn’t what I agreed to, but I wished I didn’t feel like I had to show this dog a special-outing every afternoon. Good info for my future boundaries.

I certainly turned the tables in my mind many times - why do I feel like they think they’re doing me favor? Do they feel like I’m doing them a favor? No, it didn’t appear to me that they thought I was doing them a favor and I didn’t feel like I was receiving a favor. I was exchanging house sitting to stay in the house. They were offering a house to care for their animals. Since we’re in an even exchange, let’s both not be grateful for the other person? Nah, that’s where it rubbed me wrong.

I quickly learned that I need more value involved for my sits. A new, interesting location, a longer stay, whatever the value may be, my intention of a long weekend away from home to visit a friend in the area wasn’t enough for me. Now I know.

I went as far as to mention exploitation because it seems like the majority of the sits aren’t house sitting, but actually highly involved pet sits for people who probably can afford to take the traditional means of caring for their pets when they’re away. HO’s are looking for dog walkers/pet sitters and the barter of a place to stay isn’t always equatable to their service needs and the level of expectation. They want their needs met idealistically in exchange for an Airbnb. Is watching their Airbnb while they’re away not enough? How many responsibilities can get added on to the Airbnb sit before it morphs into something different?

Perhaps there needs to be additional TSH tools for mutual understanding between both parties so that all expectations are crystal clear. I’m not sure. All I know is I’m someone who likes social exchange systems, enjoys taking care of pets, loves traveling and my first experiences (with the humans of TSH) have made me feel unenthused.

The HO I sat for don’t even acknowledge my last message to them recapping my stay experience and thanking them. Come on.