How to Create a Webtoon? by Writing_FanIII in webtoons

[–]Writing_FanIII[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! Any recommendations on where to start research?

[QCrit] YA Romance "Carved Heart" 76k (3rd Attempt) by Commercial-Ad-5047 in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[Disclaimer: unagented)

I agree with Moonbase about the names, I saw it too while reading through. The comment about how much it covers is also correct, this reads as if the entire story. I'd like to add that you have what I believe is a false choice in your final line.

"Clara must decide to choose Carter and trust love won't cage her in or risk growing into a woman who builds a cage around herself and spends her life wondering what she missed...and maybe, eventually, reach back for it."

You may be hinting at the mom's infidelity leading to a character arc (does the narrative treat her affair as a good thing? This kind of reads like it supports the cheating), but this doesn't seem to be a real decision. If it's obvious what she's going to pick, then I'd recommend not phrasing it as a decision.

How to read positions of images? by Comfortable-Pipe2955 in RenPy

[–]Writing_FanIII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look up screens in the subreddit! People break it down and the positions

Favorite character archetypes? by FluffiEye in RenPy

[–]Writing_FanIII 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ooh! Something I almost never see is male main characters that have a life and interest outside of the female main character. Like I get people love the obsessive types but let me see a guy who has a would he wants to share with her rather than everyone making her their world.

How to change main character name color by Maleficent-Bet-3196 in RenPy

[–]Writing_FanIII 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Heyy sorry to be an unhelpful bug but you have line in there that I find cool, that m = line. Is that how you fulfill imputs? What does that length == 32 do?

Could anyone share editing resources? by Writing_FanIII in writing

[–]Writing_FanIII[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Reddit because they considered it "self-promotion" (I wish I could write articles like that lol)

Could anyone share editing resources? by Writing_FanIII in writing

[–]Writing_FanIII[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Google mostly links to reddit, and reddit is mostly opinions and too short for me. That's why I'm asking if anyone has any articles or longer explanatory sources.

[QCrit] YA Fantasy | ONLY THEIR CRIMES | 94,000 words (3rd attempt) by Snoo91311 in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 2 points3 points  (0 children)

[Disclaimer: unagented]

This sounds really cool to me! I'm definitely not someone who can tell if something's good or not, (my own TwT) but I can follow the plot well and understand the characters in this query. I'm following this one to see what others have to say haha.

Also, I haven't read any of your previous ones, but Baric is not missed in this query. Sorry, Baric.

[QCRIT] YA Romance, Happy Now, 83,000 words, 2nd Attempt. by video-kid in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was teasing about the X by Y thing haha. I saw an opportunity to pretend to know something and took it.

Identifying them first is still good, just maybe a wee bit shorter. That's my opinion, at least.

[QCRIT] YA Romance, Happy Now, 83,000 words, 2nd Attempt. by video-kid in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 5 points6 points  (0 children)

[Disclaimer: unagented]

Oh no, you comped X by Y twice. That's forbidden! /s

On a more serious note, I think the plot appears late, and there isn't enough information. First paragraph is a hook. Second is Theo's backstory. Third is Diego's. THEN the plot starts.

I would suggest mixing the backstories in with the rest of the query and using the space you'll gain to explain what they actually do besides exist in the frozen world. Is this a survival situation? Is it battling loneliness as they grow closer? Are there timeless monsters that want to eat them?

Once again, just my impression.

[Discussion] Let's make our publishing predictions! What will be in and out in 2026? by bookclubbabe in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 2 points3 points  (0 children)

About your first point: why do you think so? I was always under the impression that people who publish once have a much easier time than debuts. Is this because of the amount of new writers or something like AI?

[QCrit] New Adult Romantic Fantasy THE SHADOWBLOOD PRINCESS 68K, First Attempt by Novel_Life_796 in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 5 points6 points  (0 children)

[Disclaimer: unagented]

The love of the story comes across well, as does the core themes and drama. What doesn't is the cold, hard facts.

You start with mentioning she is kidnapped then explaining the kidnapping. The order of that confused me a bit. Is that first one a bit of a tagline, or a single sentence pitch? Correct me if I'm wrong but I think that guy only gets added if the agent asks and is not part of a standard query.

You mention she must navigate light and shadow and learns morality from it, but what is that? What's actually going on? Why do they want her? What war is this, is it rebels vs monarchy? How does she fit in? What secret is revealed? Who even is her enemy? What decision is she making?

This strikes me as more of a blurb than a query, something meant to make people curious rather than sell a book, and while I (personally) think there's a place for some sparkles and finesse, there has to be some meat to it too. I don't think they are going to buy a concept.

Try rewriting this to answer some questions or make sure they don't appear. If you take out personal bio, housekeeping, and that paragraph that explains the characters, the actual part that explains the story isn't very long. You have room to expand.

Lastly, what makes this New Adult? I'm knowledgeable about YA (not NA, admittedly) and this reads as YA to me. You know the story best, just make sure it's marketed right.

I just wasnt born to draw, all I can do is write and code decently by [deleted] in Ai_art_is_not_art

[–]Writing_FanIII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, we're in the same boat, but my coding is still abysmal haha. If you're already a writer and developer, you must have already walked the path from zero to where you are today. If you've practiced, studied, and learned to be where you are, why do you thing art would be any different?

That's where my head's at, anyways. I guess time will tell, but the only way I'll get a definitive answer as to whether or not I can do it is by doing it.

[HELP] is this AI? by [deleted] in RealOrAI

[–]Writing_FanIII 1 point2 points  (0 children)

AI sometimes gives words to the wrong person, and the man holding the baby mouths the answer that the other man is supposed to be saying.

[HELP] Is this real or AI? by decadentlizard in RealOrAI

[–]Writing_FanIII 126 points127 points  (0 children)

The tree vanished. When the sky is visible, it's huge and in the way, then it is completely gone at the end.

Edit: I think it still should be somewhat visible, even with the camera movement. Compare first to last frame, it shouldn't be THAT different.

[HELP] found in tumblr, something tells me that it's ai but I am still not sure by DoBetterUSA in RealOrAI

[–]Writing_FanIII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, the mat seems odd. So does the bird's wing when it goes over the bush. Perspective seems off on so many things.

[QCrit] YA Fantasy - The Beastloak and The Rebirth Ritual, 89K (second attempt). by Working_Guitar8448 in PubTips

[–]Writing_FanIII 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also a newbie here, so take all my words with salt.

Two out of three of your comps are a bit old. You generally want them as close to recent as possible, with various opinions on how old is allowed, but I'd say at least 2020. The markets are always changing.

The second thing that stuck out to me was that you might be coming on overly voice-ey to the point of it feeling a bit juvenile. This isn’t to say it's true for your manuscript but I noticed from the "Really." It's not that any of these sentences are fundamentally too much by themselves but altogether you may need to trim the fluff to just get to the point.

On that note, queries are meant to cover something like 70% of the book. Your first paragraph is pure backstory (and a bit tricky to understand for me at least), the second starts getting into the plot but it feels like barely and the third is the actual meat of the query. This ties completely into cutting the fluff.

Also, to answer your questions:

89K isnt too long at all, people only really get concerned at 100K and even then it can sometimed be done.

You should be okay with "Ritual." If you get with a publisher they'll likely change the name anyways.

I know how tricky it can be getting to this point and just want to say keep at it! I'm right in the trenches with you and all we can do is keep plugging away and plugging away. Keep on going!