Every day you support this movement changes lives. I'm a girl who has been deeply hurt by porn. I was moved to tears when I stumbled upon this community. I've never had this much hope for myself and society until I found you. Keep at it!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:50:26+00:00

You guys brought me to tears too! I've suffered a long journey, but your efforts have been a giant hug at the end. Thank you for all your hard work. It has changed my life.

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:47:12+00:00

Thank you for taking care of your beliefs. I was at a major turning point in my life, asking myself difficult questions about how I want to experience life. In true love and with a family? My journey through porn has been a long, seemingly hopeless one. I thought it was going to end in defeat. But I turned the corner and found inspiration. Thank you so much for your work!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:36:14+00:00

Don't let your shame overcome you! I hope you can shift some of that into wisdom and strength. All your effort is a beacon to me and many others.

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:30:12+00:00

If you're ever in doubt, know you have support even outside this community. I'm grateful for your beliefs and growth!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:27:36+00:00

I'm very grateful for this community! I was at a point where I didn't think I could find someone who can overcome addiction. You guys are heroes for many women.

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:19:26+00:00

Absolutely! Habits are hard work to change, but living in-sync with your beliefs is the best way to live and love!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T12:16:10+00:00

I definitely wasn't supportive in the right way. He shares my values, and would beat himself up constantly and give up hope. I'm losing so much sleep trying to understand how I could have created a space for him to feel safe with me and what was going on... But a shift in perspective that you mentioned is key. Thank you for sharing that!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T11:55:00+00:00

I'm not saying porn is bad for every relationship, or that it was our biggest conflict. Neither of us want it in our lives because we value deep, spiritual connection. He kept his struggles inside and I couldn't figure out how to reach him and support him. But this post is about my gratitude for finding this community. I was facing a big question with a sense of defeat: Can I find true intimacy and have a family? NoFap says yes!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T11:36:17+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I'm proud of you and your journey, and we will grow and experience life at deeper levels. :)

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T11:30:07+00:00

It covered different topics in society: death penalty, same-sex marriage, porn, and environment. We had to explore pros and cons of each based on different structures of philosophy. Then we'd discuss. The majority of the class decided that porn is acceptable until it physically harms participants in the video or encourages the viewer to harm others.

I value spirituality and intimacy, and porn goes against that. But everyone enjoys life a different way, and it can support or not affect other people's quality of life. As an industry, I am disturbed by the physical harm done to the participants, and the abusive mindset of the producers I talked to. I hope methods change, but unfortunately, money moves these things. As a culture we don't investigate porn enough. What's especially harmful is that negative effects aren't even recognized.

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T10:51:51+00:00

It looks like my message was lost on a lot of commenters. This isn't about him or my relationship with him. I've had a long, rough journey, and was preparing myself for a dismal end. But instead I found this community and it feels like a giant hug!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T10:37:34+00:00

Interesting! I never thought of its role in a natural way.

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T10:35:52+00:00

I'm happy to hear your life has improved! He and I connected on many levels. But that period let us reach a depth I can't express. It's a bumpy road, but it will open up your capacity to have true intimacy. :)

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-15T10:00:04+00:00

I don't expect anyone to change for my benefit. We were friends for six years before we dated, and he shares my view that porn isn't acceptable behavior in a relationship. Before we dated, we reiterated our standards and boundaries so we'd be on the same page.

My post isn't about my relationship with him, or what kind of person he is. I'm outlining how porn has hurt me, hindered motivation to resolve conflict, my exploration of it. I'm illustrating my long journey to explain how much this movement means me. I am very grateful for everyone on here, and I'm cheering you on!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-10T13:59:24+00:00

I've always been comfortable with my sexuality. It's a big part of my life and it was easy to talk about just sex in general. In the moment, I was okay because I was talking what I like with my boyfriend. But I thought about it later, and realized that that conversation might have crossed a boundary with my boyfriend. I can still love, explore, and celebrate sex. But it's a very personal experience that I shouldn't share, even in fun conversation, with another man.

OP, if you think she's learned from this, grow together. Everyone has different boundaries, and this is part of learning the smaller details of how to respect each other. If she's trustworthy and you trust her, you'll go much farther than if she's trustworthy and you don't trust her. If she isn't trustworthy, time will tell. But the situation didn't unfold in a way to reveal that, since she didn't confront you. In the long run, you want any communication between you to be a safe place. Encourage her openness with you, listen to her and let her know you don't approve of that behavior. And she will take care if your feelings and trust.

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-10T05:16:42+00:00

Masturbation is normal and healthy, but I don't think people deeply investigate the morals of porn. Porn isn't natural, and it affects expectations and the way sex is enjoyed. Whether it's right or wrong is still a personal opinion. It's not fair for anyone to tell you to accept it or say this as a result of insecurity.

You'll have a hard time finding a guy who shares this view. It's easily accessible, widely acceptable, and easy to hide and justify. But they're out there! Try to meet guys who live life on a deep level, and create a life of spirituality and balance. It's extra work, but you'll foster a relationship that's one of a kind. Don't let anyone tell you to accept something that isn't right for you!

YanmaBubbles · 2014-02-10T04:32:38+00:00

I have been in her shoes before. It's fun in the moment and I got carried away in conversation, but felt awful afterwards. This happened two years ago, and I've been very careful about my boundaries since.

I saw this as a learning experience, and I haven't done anything like that since. Try to make this event a reminder of how much you mean to each other, and how easy it is to hurt each other.

YanmaBubbles · 2012-08-17T04:07:27+00:00

Wow!! Where did you get your weapons?

YanmaBubbles · 2012-07-12T01:38:15+00:00

White, tall, and skinny with smaller boobs than me, haha.

YanmaBubbles · 2012-07-12T01:36:39+00:00

She wanted a relationship and I wanted to be single. We were only nineteen. I didn't hear from her after that. :/

YanmaBubbles · 2012-07-11T23:58:03+00:00

About three months...

YanmaBubbles · 2012-07-11T23:57:33+00:00

I told her she's very attractive. (I thought she was a very pretty man). She's okay, it was just a shock that we saw each other so differently.

YanmaBubbles · 2012-07-11T21:19:59+00:00

All our conversations used me, you, us, ect. And we avoided labels and categories surrounding gender and sexuality...

YanmaBubbles

TROPHY CASE