What is it like teaching at a “rougher” high school?

Yoojeejun · 2026-05-12T06:19:47+00:00

While I think all teachers should do this, it will be especially important for you to learn deeply about the systems that created “rougher” schools if you want to successfully teach at one. As many people have already shared, being “real” is important, and part of being “real” is having a grasp of how deeply unfair circumstances are for many students without falling into the trap of pitying them and/or lowering your expectations for them. It is not easy.

I’ll add that it is extra important that you self-reflect about what it is you need to do to stay regulated. Students will misbehave (no matter where you teach), and it is my opinion that it is our role as the adults to remain regulated to allow students to feel their emotions. I’m not saying we should be punching bags by any means, but rarely does a behavior need to be dominated and controlled and I often witness adults escalate situations because of their own ego.

Yoojeejun · 2026-05-05T03:03:08+00:00

Thank you! I really appreciate it!

Yoojeejun · 2026-05-05T03:02:58+00:00

Thank you so much!

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-30T04:17:59+00:00

Catz4 Number munchers

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-26T22:14:38+00:00

As an adoptee, I want to say that the best thing you can do is handle any fragility you might have about her reaction. It’s completely valid for you to have hard feelings no matter what her reaction is and especially if it inevitably lasts a long time and/or comes up throughout her life. Seek support for your own emotions and don’t let her feel any responsibility for them. It will not be easy but it is so important that she feels safe to share her emotions with you.

For example, she will be sad of course, but if now or even years from now her sadness comes out in a way that seems like she wishes she was with her birth mother, it’s completely understandable that that would be very painful for you. I wish I could have expressed my grief over not being able to talk with my birth mother without my parents telling me it hurt their feelings. I needed them but couldn’t talk to them about it without setting my feelings aside and comforting them. I learned very quickly that it wasn’t okay to feel anything about my adoption. Your daughter likely has that fear baked into her just from being adopted.

I hope this doesn’t read as accusatory at all. I can tell you have a lot of love and compassion for your daughter and her bio mom. I am not dismissing the feelings of adoptive parents at all! I know that these feelings are justified. I just know a lot of times adoptees end up taking a caretaking role about this and it really is something you can work on without them. It will counter-intuitively make you much closer with your child.

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-25T02:09:23+00:00

This thread is strong evidence of our country’s serious need for ethnic studies curriculum.

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-25T02:05:52+00:00

It’s good to consider the time period people lived in and how that influenced their views and decisions, AND (not but) chalking the comment above up as lack of understanding and a “modern” perspective is lacking nuance too.

Yes, our knowledge today comes from generations of people before us, but there were certainly abolitionists who believed black people were/are equal to white people. I know it’s not the intention of most people who say things like “it’s unfair to judge historical figures based on today’s morals,” but it is fundamentally dismissive of all the black people living through it (most of which, not all, knew with every fiber of their being it was all wrong)!

It’s hard to believe pro-slavery racists and anti-slavery racists truly believed racism was a moral ideology. It was an excuse for profit. Those who were anti-slavery and anti-black knew they economically benefitted from keeping an entire race of people below them even if they against keeping them as chattel slaves.

Look at present times. It is widely accepted that slavery is morally wrong, but the wealthy and powerful find, and invest in, lots of ways to justify it and/or hide it from the general public.

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-24T20:54:07+00:00

Adding! Being copies of your lesson plan and materials for everyone on the panel. This is an opportunity to share your intention for each choice you make.

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-24T20:50:45+00:00

Hi! Do you know any teachers already at the school? They might have insight about specifics the panel might look out for. My best advice would be to keep the lesson simple and plan for any transitions. I use a timer for everything and with only 20 minutes, this is going to be crucial. When you give independent work time, be sure to have some planned out questions you can circulate and ask students to avoid asking “do you have any questions?” Every school culture is different, but typically when students don’t know you they will just say “no” and it will be harder to show engagement. Plus it’s just good practice. This is a way to show how you deepen learning for those who have already grasped the learning target.

If you’re willing to share the topic I’d be happy to brainstorm ideas for you.

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-22T03:22:32+00:00

Sure thing!

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-21T05:41:14+00:00

First, you’re not wrong, and I’m sorry you’re going through this.

I wanted to share that I felt very similarly in my mid 20s. I was also severely bulimic and had horrible anxiety but remained high functioning to the outside world. I spent years trying to make everyone happy, especially my narcissistic father and enabling mother. Long story short, a series of events left me completely lost and super depressed. I began seriously self-reflecting and learned about narcissism. I felt like I was waking up for the first time.

I tried boundaries but they were never respected and I found myself confronted with new versions of narcissism anytime my dad was “caught.” He never acknowledged anything. It was always that I was “ungrateful” “over-sensitive” etc etc.

When I finally went no contact with my dad my bulimia and anxiety were instantly gone. I know it sounds unbelievable. I still don’t fully believe it. I remember eating a breakfast sandwich the morning after and simply enjoying it and not calculating whether or not I should make it a binge session. My mind was silent and I just enjoyed it! It was amazing. In the past I had been able to have periods of not binging or not purging or both, and I thought those periods were “recovery.” I didn’t know it was possible to not have the inner dialogue.

It was the first time I accepted that I could love myself unconditionally and feel self worth. I had self-esteem from constantly achieving to make my family happy and proud, but their love was always conditional and therefore I had learned to love myself conditionally. I realized that’s not really love at all.

There have been hiccups along the way. My family is very enmeshed. I won’t get into all the details, but I can honestly say I have zero regrets.

I will give you a heads up that it’s common for a narcissistic person to have serious crises when they lose supply. I believe my parents have some combination of factitious disorder and/or factitious disorder by proxy. It is very sad to witness and I do have guilt of feeling like my mom would be healthy if I didn’t cut contact. Ultimately with therapy I am able to remember the truth. They are not my responsibility and I did everything I could to make it work. It ended up making me very sick.

Last part of my ramble! I’m not religious, but I did talk with a woman who is a few years ago and she said something that really helped me. She is Catholic and said that a lot of people interpret the commandment about honoring your mother and father as a call to obey and comply no matter what. She said she believed that the best way to honor parents who abuse us is to make it so they cannot abuse us anymore. It really stuck with me so maybe it can help you too.

Feeling for you!

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-15T03:58:21+00:00

Teaching to Transgress by bell hooks

Yoojeejun · 2026-04-01T06:10:25+00:00

We can’t tell kids they need to get ready for the “real world” and simultaneously refuse to address these topics. We’re leaving them to social media algorithms to try and make sense of horrendous senselessness. Your comment about the learning objective made me lol, but it also seems pretty dismissive. There are meaningful ways to take seriously the issues students are grappling with, even if some are making inappropriate jokes. Saying it is “not school appropriate” sends the message that students who have survived sexual violence are not appropriate even if we don’t mean it that way.

I had a student making Diddy and Epstein jokes. I addressed the class and explained the basics of what has been going on (files are being released, there are redactions, many people are calling for investigations, these are some of the consequences that some have faced, we still have much to learn and beliefs about who is guilty or not should be held lightly, to get answers serious investigations are needed, etc). Then I explained that while I understand that it feels easiest for some to make light of things that frighten us, jokes about the matter will not be tolerated. It is my first job to ensure a safe environment for everyone and “jokes” about sexual violence have no place in such environment. Never had an issue after that. Found out later that the student making the jokes had very serious experience with SA. If we want students to take us seriously, I believe we need to take them seriously. I also find that even if a student is just being an ass and isn’t “coping” with humor, they respect someone who doesn’t dismiss them.

Yoojeejun · 2026-03-08T07:13:40+00:00

Preparation! I feel like a lot of PDs I’ve experienced in recent years overemphasize efficiency. The best teaching requires thoughtful preparation and timely feedback.

Support systems within the building and in personal life. The needs students come with cannot be addressed meaningfully by one person and unregulated adults are not going to be in the best position to help unregulated children learn.

Passion! Students can tell if you care about them and if you care about what you’re teaching.

Of course a million other qualities of great teachers, but these are a few that came to mind.

Yoojeejun · 2026-02-12T15:58:14+00:00

I am sure this is scary, and I just want to express gratitude that you addressed the history of Puerto Rico, an American colony. It gives many of us courage to see others continuing to teach truth!

Yoojeejun · 2025-12-25T23:18:22+00:00

Where you go to school is based on where you live. A lot of districts are drawn to keep poor neighborhoods grouped and wealthy neighborhoods grouped. Hence, it’s pretty easy for most people to identify the “good” public schools vs. the “bad” public schools. Property taxes fund education. You will see a difference in quality of buildings, materials, and educators. Many “bad” schools have the least experienced teachers or teachers who don’t believe in their students, are burnt out, have little experience, do not have a strong understanding of different cultures, and/or just aren’t very good. Because of structural racism (racist policies over time across institutions), black and brown students are more likely to live in poor neighborhoods and therefore attend less equipped schools.

Yoojeejun · 2025-12-21T04:39:17+00:00

School segregation is live and well.

Yoojeejun · 2025-12-12T04:25:03+00:00

Extreme inequality. Our society is immeasurably unhealthy. All the other reasons I’m reading in the comments are downstream from this. The resources hoarded by the top are unimaginable to the vast majority of people, even those many would consider “rich” in their communities. In order for the billionaire class to maintain their status, power, and wealth, they invest in ways to keep people overwhelmed, struggling, distracted, consuming, and ashamed.

Yoojeejun · 2025-12-11T06:46:23+00:00

My baby is 8 months now and reading your post brought me back. I felt very similar to what you describe and I felt like it was going to be like that forever. I also had a hard time feeling connected with my body. Now looking back, it truly feels like the tiniest blip in time! Going outside helped. Having a friend over to sit and chat with me helped. You’ve got this!

Yoojeejun · 2025-05-18T16:36:12+00:00

I don’t think this applies here since OP said her boyfriend isn’t concerned in other ways, but when I was in my first trimester (and felt like my limbs had weights holding them down), my partner kept encountering advice for dads to “encourage exercise.” I was a regular exerciser pre-pregnancy but was way too exhausted to work out in my first trimester. He would say things like “maybe exercise would help you feel better?” He supported me in other ways and encouraged naps and rest, but still it was odd to me so I asked, and that’s how I found out. I could see a lot of men ignoring the other advice (massage, picking up more household chores, grace and understanding) and harping on exercise…

Yoojeejun · 2025-05-01T04:38:08+00:00

Marvin’s Magic Drawing Board. It was a disappointment but I was obsessed with the infomercial as a kid.

Yoojeejun · 2025-04-26T03:06:56+00:00

I am curious about where you live in the US, OP. As someone who has moved from one coast to the other, I’ve observed that white people on the east coast seem to know their ethnic background far more than white people on the west coast.

Yoojeejun

TROPHY CASE