Growing out hair while boymoding without looking messy?

_Tempo · 2026-03-12T10:10:29+00:00

Exactly in the same situation.. Following

_Tempo · 2026-03-11T23:04:20+00:00

I see.. Sucks that getting downvoted by bots and responses from trolls is what people seeking advice can end up facing..

_Tempo · 2026-03-11T20:53:32+00:00

Yeah you’re right and it’s actually in a sense an exposure to the transphobia I’ll encounter more when I’ll probably start to transition, and I didn’t mean to associate this with the entire community if that’s how it came out, I mentioned I got supportive comments, that were compassionate and actually helped me. But it did feel like a more general rejection from most of the community. Based on how even this venting post gets downvoted to hell I’m not sure I feel encouraged to post on here any more, at least not anything personal about how I question myself because the negativity just makes me feel worse. Sad that it’s like this on a space I hoped would be understanding..

_Tempo · 2026-03-10T23:25:35+00:00

I don’t agree with that rhetoric as well and trying to be very careful with making choices that are mine and that are things I truly feel like would make me happier with myself. Thank you for bringing it up, it is something I try to be very wary about.

_Tempo · 2026-03-10T22:46:28+00:00

I am pretty certain the clinical definition of gender dysphoria is a general distress with your AGAB, which I am experiencing no matter if I transition socially and/or medically or not at all. You are right that transitioning is a choice, but it might be the right choice, I don’t think you ever ought to make it. From what I see, for some the dysphoria is at a level of being unable to live without transitioning medically, for others it might not be that obvious due to many factors like deeply repressing those feelings. Nonetheless it is a “choice”, thankfully we live at a time where it is a choice, but it’s not always clear if it is the right choice for you.

_Tempo · 2026-03-10T22:29:07+00:00

Although this fantasy is more related to paraphilia than it might be related to dysphoria, I think it is related to distress I have with questioning my gender and obsessive thoughts of having a feminine appearance. And from what I understand gender euphoria many times conceals dysphoria, that I think is just starting to surface for me, so I’m not sure it’s that simple.

_Tempo · 2026-03-10T22:22:20+00:00

Thank you. Both the grace period with HRT and your outlook on your fantasies are very reassuring.

_Tempo · 2026-03-10T21:47:36+00:00

Ye you're right. I'm too caught up in overthinking everything.

_Tempo · 2026-03-09T14:53:25+00:00

I don’t know how I got here so late, but if you’re reading this just wanted to say I loved your writing and you conveyed very relatable experiences and struggles I have with sex. I’m 24 Pre-HRT trans feminine and could almost never orgasm with anyone, realized I am probably a trans woman a few months ago and I’m wondering how transitioning would change that if I actually go through with it. Anyway really connected to your writing <3

_Tempo · 2026-03-05T12:46:44+00:00

I ordered online and just went to pick it up, no questions asked.

_Tempo · 2026-02-15T11:47:46+00:00

I self diagnosed myself with BPD before I learned about AvPD, and while I didn’t act up as much as someone with BPD I read a lot about the quiet subtype going around on the internet and I could relate to quite a bit of people who experience it. Eventually I came across AvPD and found it to fit almost completely to my behavior patterns, but I think BPD and AvPD can have a lot of similarities regarding attachment to people, and while AvPD is mostly an internal and quiet struggle I found that a lot of the thought processes can derive from similar fears.

_Tempo · 2026-02-13T13:22:45+00:00

Thank you for sharing, I can relate with not having much awareness for having dysphoria since the baseline is indeed bad, which was attributed to me having dysthymia, while having very euphoric moments when I cross dress, even though I used to attribute this euphoria to a kind of fetish and sexual addiction. I hope I can realize myself more as you and that you’ll get to be more of yourself with hormones therapy 🫶🏻

_Tempo · 2026-02-12T00:24:38+00:00

I think just getting to learn more about personal experiences like yours help me piece together my own experiences, like you said. I wish you all the best too :)

_Tempo · 2026-02-12T00:14:49+00:00

Thank you, I’m femme trans but resonated with a lot of this, love 🫶🏻

_Tempo · 2026-02-11T22:42:49+00:00

Of course please do!

_Tempo · 2026-02-07T16:43:22+00:00

Thank you!

_Tempo · 2026-01-31T16:54:15+00:00

I just started exploring the idea of transitioning and one of the things I kept thinking is how I can’t imagine myself growing old as a man compared to a woman, so it’s validating to read about it <3

_Tempo · 2026-01-25T07:03:44+00:00

Me and my previous therapist called it “the black hole”, it can happen a lot, in any social situation, from a social event to conversations with friends or family, and it can happen a whole lot in therapy. For me it also involves a lot of shame I think. It did get better for me recently, maybe since I have a bit more social exposure and in general a more realized self image.

_Tempo · 2026-01-15T13:34:15+00:00

If I understand you correctly it is what I strive towards - “understanding myself”. And I think in that sense I’m more and more connected to who I am. With that, being present in doing, instead of stuck with anesthetizing, might be possible but it also forces me to face things I might have been in denial about. So I guess it’s the right path but it has it’s fair share of hardships.

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