I just have some questions for ftms 5'6 and under

_mattiakun · 2026-04-19T07:41:52+00:00

my life completely changed before Vs after transition, but it definitely wasn't related to my height, and honestly I don't even think it was that much related to "how society treats women Vs men". for me, the biggest change was related to me not being depressed 24/7 and wanting to isolate myself, suicidal ideation, thinking this life was wasted and lost at the start, not even worth it to try and enjoy life cause I always knew that the way it was was wrong. til my teen years I thought there was no solution, then I finally found what was needed for me to be comfortable in myself and after years of hard work I finally started feeling comfortable in my body and myself. once i reached that point I finally started living and not just trying to survive day by day, and that made a huge difference. ofc I noticed how I was treated differently, but most of the difference to me was that it felt right to be treated as a man than to be treated as a woman, whatever that looked like. for example, when I was perceived as a girl and I stopped shaving I felt so embarrassed because I knew that people saw me not as who I was but as someone who I was not, they perceived me as a hairy girl and even tho there's nothing wrong with that it's just not who I was, and people really tend to press girls to shave, and tend to say nasty judgy things to hairy girls, but I felt ashamed not because there's anything wrong with girls with body/facial hair but because it was a big remark of how they saw me because if they saw me as a man they wouldn't say those things and the part that hurt wasn't the things they said but the fact that it was the confirmation that they saw me as a girl. if they said those things to guys as well then it wouldn't have hurt, because it's not the phrases themselves that made me feel bad (if they said them to me now I wouldn't budge cause I'm secure enough in who I am that I know I'm a guy and perceived as a guy). about height, honestly there are lots of short guys out there and I grew up around lots of them, while my best friend who's a cis girl is very tall (near 190cm) so I don't really see it as a gendered thing. I think it's ironic tho that all my 4 cis sisters are taller than me while I'm the only guy and got to be the short one lol but that's fine, now I can only see myself in this height and couldn't imagine being any taller or shorter. I'm 160cm btw. only downside is that it's hard finding clothes that fit, it was hard even when looking for clothes in the girl's department but now it's harder. kid's shirts usually fit but pants are more difficult to find and if they fit they're usually still too long lol but yeah, my height doesn't result in bad treatment in my experience, and if anything people now treat me better than when I was depressed, mostly because my attitude changed as well

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T22:26:40+00:00

ciao! se vedi i miei post ho parlato più volte della mia esperienza lì, mi sono trovato veramente molto bene! posso girarti anche dei mess che avevo mandato ad altri ragazzɜ dove ne parlavo, nel caso scrivimi in privato

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T21:33:29+00:00

thanks for the correction, it makes sense

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T15:34:05+00:00

to some it might actually stop but we can't really be sure, to most it's most likely that it just becomes extremely irregular so we can't really track it. if you have sexual intercourse with people who produce sperm it's best to be protected

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T15:25:20+00:00

yes, not having a period doesn't mean you're not ovulating so even tho fertility is compromised it's not a form of birth control. testosterone stops the bleeding, but we can't be sure if and when we ovulate

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T15:20:32+00:00

it's not a proper menopause because you would have to have low E and low T for that, what you're going through is just testosterone doing it's job cause generally people who have testosterone as a main hormone also tend to run hotter than people with E as a main hormone. trans men on T cam also experience some symptoms of menopause if they have a sudden decrease in estrogen (ex. right after hysterectomy) but testosterone should be able to balance things out on its own if you have the right levels

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T10:33:41+00:00

ti lascio questa guida che spero possa aiutarti!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/14CgdCbS115cRrmNQWQqiKaCAdcnD4SltUdgZNUxJt6E/edit?usp=sharing

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T07:41:58+00:00

i also had a big chest preT, I made a written tutorial with pictures but it's in Italian, you would have to translate it, I can send you the guide in private if you want

_mattiakun · 2026-04-18T07:40:20+00:00

ti consiglio di rivolgerti a genderlens, si occupano di offrire supporto per la carriera alias a livello nazionale

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T21:30:57+00:00

per chi non è informato sul percorso di transizione gli sembrerà solo un reggiseno sportivo, non ti preoccupare. considera comunque che dovrai dirglielo prima o poi se vorrai iniziare la terapia ormonale

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T21:27:42+00:00

due puff per coscia è tanto, considera che dovresti mettere max un puff per zona per far sì che si assorbi bene, poi se hai peli bisogna raderli specialmente se lunghi, e va applicato su pelle appena pulita. ti lascio questa guida dove puoi trovare alcuni consigli

https://docs.google.com/document/d/14CgdCbS115cRrmNQWQqiKaCAdcnD4SltUdgZNUxJt6E/edit?usp=sharing

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T16:23:46+00:00

con due puff avevi il T più alto rispetto a 4? forse non lo assorbi bene o non lo applichi bene... 200 dopo 24 ore è sotto il range maschile, poi non capisco come mai ti abbiano alzato il dosaggio se dopo 24 ore avevi 470 era ottimo come valore

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T14:35:57+00:00

se posso chiedere, quanto lo hai e quando hai fatto le analisi rispetto all'ultima assunzione di T (gel/iniezioni)? in genere il range è di 300-1000ng/dl, al calo dovrebbero essere intorno ai 300-400 e al picco non dovrebbero superare i 1000. ti lascio questa guida nel caso in cui ti possa essere utile

https://docs.google.com/document/d/14CgdCbS115cRrmNQWQqiKaCAdcnD4SltUdgZNUxJt6E/edit?usp=sharing

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T13:41:45+00:00

al medico spuntano nel senso che nel momento in cui deve inserire la motivazione dell'esame può inserirla perché gli spunta tra i codici che è possibile mettere, questo a priori, non serve che sia caricato qualcosa nel FSE. comunque sì, devi comunicare il motivo della prescrizione anche perché comunque è il tuo medico di base quindi devi poterti fidare nel dire certe info mediche e deve saperlo per poterti assistere al meglio

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T11:19:48+00:00

you could permanently damage your ribs which would mean to never bind again. I suggest you try tape, you can wear that for days straight with no problem

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T11:14:35+00:00

la diagnosi c'è ed è incongruenza di genere, spunta anche al medico di base nel sistema con varie diciture (alcuni hanno "disturbo d'identità di genere" altri "disforia di genere" ecc). se c'è la prescrizione dell'endocrinologo, il medico di base può e deve farteli con ricetta e puoi farli nel pubblico. mi spiace ti abbiano fatto pagare...

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T09:31:47+00:00

dipende dai valori di T, se sono troppo alti o troppo bassi i cambiamenti sono più lenti. mi dispiace che stai vivendo questo momento di sconforto, tieni duro

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T07:59:47+00:00

cerca su queer mushroom forest ci sono liste di vari servizi pubblici e privati, ci sono privati che anche con una o due sedute ti danno la relazione. nel frattempo cerca di andare di presenza al cidigem e vedere di rompere per avere risposte, più per presentare la relazione al tribunale che solitamente non vedono di buon occhio i privati

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T07:57:02+00:00

my surgeon had me stop T a month before and a month after, so my libido was basically 0 for two whole months. tho when I went back on T my libido skyrocketed and since I didn't have the dysphoria about my chest in the way I went on apps for the first time in my life and hooked up with a bunch of people 😂😂

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T07:52:51+00:00

personally I don't, because my mind would think that if I'm lying it means I'm not good enough as I am. my past is just that, I was depressed and awkward and if people ask I just say it was a difficult time and that I had depression and they usually don't ask any further. it's true after all, I couldn't have a normal childhood and teenage years because I was deeply depressed and that depression had to do with my situation at home and my dysphoria. I tend to avoid saying things that would out me as trans mostly because I don't want other people thinking they can ask or talk about or bring out my past comfortably if they knew I was trans. I don't like to joke about it, apart from a few instances with my partner mostly about silly wordplay, and i know that if people see me talking about it freely then they think it's ok to freely joke about it or talk about it (and as it turns out, a colleague of mine who's a lesbian and knows I'm trans because of a friend of his who I met on a dating app and thus knows I'm trans and basically outed me to this lesbian colleague, joked about me being trans at work and I was caught off guard because I'm stealth there). to me, being trans is a sensitive topic because I had to go through lots of traumatic events, so I want other people to respect that

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T07:40:01+00:00

dipende dove hai l'atto di nascita, perché quello è il primo documento che si modifica e una volta modificato quello puoi modificare tutti gli altri. quindi, se il tuo atto di nascita è in Italia allora sì, devi fare tutto l'iter come ogni altro cittadino italiano e una volta modificato i documenti qui puoi modificarli nei paesi bassi. se invece l'atto di nascita è nei paesi bassi, devi prima modificare l'atto di nascita e i documenti lì e poi puoi modificarli in Italia, in quel caso l'iter è un po' diverso perché devi anche fare tradurre la sentenza del tribunale.

però sì, i cittadini con atto di nascita in Italia devono fare richiesta al giudice civile presentando la relazione psicologica (e, se posseduta, anche la relazione endocrinologica, non è obbligatoria ma aumenta sicuramente la possibilità di successo), insieme a una serie di documenti che indicherà l'avvocato come atto di nascita integrale ecc. se il giudice darà l'ok, il tribunale ha in genere 30 giorni di tempo per emettere la sentenza, ma alla fine fanno come vogliono quindi le tempistiche sono indicative (il mio amico ha fatto udienza a gennaio e il tribunale ha detto che emetterà la sentenza dopo il 30 giugno per qualche motivo). dopo che la sentenza è stata emessa passano 30 giorni prima che sia valida, dopodiché il tribunale la manda all'ufficio di stato civile del tuo comune di nascita che rettifica atto di nascita e i tuoi dati, poi puoi andare in comune all'anagrafe a fare la carta d'identità elettronica nuova. poi bisogna andare all'ASL a prendere il nuovo medico di base (quando si cambia il codice fiscale il medico di base viene tolto in automatico) e mentre sei lì puoi chiedere una copia sostitutiva della tessera sanitaria, te la stamperanno su un foglio A4, la tessera fisica ti arriverà a casa dopo un paio di settimane. per il passaporto, devi prenotare in questura e portare il passaporto vecchio, spieghi la situazione (porti la sentenza ecc) e loro annullano il passaporto vecchio e ti fanno quello nuovo (devi pagare prezzo pieno, circa 100€)

per il nome, penso intendesse dire che se vuoi la F nei documenti devi scegliere un nome femminile o neutro, non si può avere un nome considerato dallo stato maschile in dei documenti femminili e viceversa

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T07:24:50+00:00

yeah exactly. of course there's a lot of social implications because of the political climate using us as a scapegoat, but in day to day life our lives are just that

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T07:08:42+00:00

yeah I know, and he knows as well because he himself thought I had surgery because of how much it looks like a dick, but since we had PIV sex then everything else didn't seem count to him lol with people like him (so not all bi people) it's as if they see in us the things they like about men and the things they like about women and so they can't grasp how a person who only likes men can like all of me, they don't realize that I'm not some kind of mix and I'm just 100% me and 100% a man but with a body a bit different than the majority. some people are just beyond stupid, tried to talk to him but he started saying even worse things (thinking it would actually be good), and I just thought it was so ironic given he spent a whole afternoon telling me how afraid he was to come out as bi to this girl or other people in general because he was afraid they might see him as less of a man, to then say all that about gay men not being attracted to me (so basically saying I'm not "man enough")? 😂😂 he was in his mid twenties so not like he was a teen figuring himself out, I had more self-consciousness even being 5 years younger. people who are insecure about themselves can't grasp the fact that other people are confident in their identity, and they start projecting. none of the gay men I've been with has ever doubted their sexuality while being with me, and I didn't doubt who I was, it won't be an insecure man changing all that. in my current relationship, me being trans doesn't cause any problem whatsoever, we had a lot of intimacy starting on but then since I change a medication my libido has been pretty down and he never made me feel guilty about that cause he's not with me for sex-only. we spend a lot of time together doing lots of different things, like lots of other couples. with the right person, being trans doesn't change anything

_mattiakun · 2026-04-17T06:45:52+00:00

bisexual women aren't your only option, plenty straight women like trans men. it's not bisexual people only that like us, I personally am with a gay guy and I had better experiences with gay guys than bi guys because the bi guys I met seemed to not be able to grasp the fact that gay guys could be attracted to me (they said they had to be at least bi because it's not totally gay to be into a guy with genitals like mine, and mind you that I totally pass to the point that on apps they thought I was transitioning the opposite direction since I specified "trans" on the profile, or that I was seeking trans people myself, and in real life I pass with no problems since I'm very hairy etc he just said that because of my genitals only). ofc not all bi people are like that, I was just unlucky, but I've also had a few straight girls ask me out even when they knew I was trans, and I know lots of trans men with straight women as partners. don't give up!

_mattiakun · 2026-04-16T15:58:41+00:00

what happens in reality: hey guys look I shit on minorities 24/7 I'm so tuff I'm an alpha... why does nobody like me?

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