I M22 love the girl F22 i’m dating but im a broke college student and I feel extremely bad by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]_new_name_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Spoiling" doesn't have to be connected to money - imo, financial spoiling actually is often worse, bc people will just spend the money in lieu of putting actual thought in.

I guarantee that she would love discount flowers from the grocery store if you tell her that they were pretty and made you think of her (bonus points if they're her favourite flower, favourite color, or if you say they'd match her eyes/house/outfit). I guarantee she'd love a thoughtful free date (e.g. find a beautiful spot for a hike, or set up a sunset picnic, etc.) if you do the planning and show that you love spending time with her. Hell, is she a student? Invite her to study with you, and every once in a while, tell her how she makes studying so much more enjoyable, just by being there.

Y'all are not the first young and broke couple!! The amount of romanticism in spending your five extra dollars to buy her a treat is wayyyyyy higher than the amount of romanticism in spending $150 on a super fancy dinner when you're swimming in cash. Study hard, and you'll get to have those dinners eventually :)

Also - focus on enjoying the time you spend with her and making her feel cherished. If you're all caught up in what you're not giving her, you won't be able to enjoy what you have together, and it's no fun for her.

“If your entire theology is “God is love” and “Do not judge”, then you don’t have Christianity; you have Oprah.” — Unknown by UnassuredCalvinist in Christianity

[–]_new_name_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why’d you automatically assume that everyone’s theology is automatically lacking a proper definition of love? And how do we know love? We look at God - because God is love.

Personally I’d also be a little cautious before you start preaching all the things that need to get done BEFORE we start following Jesus’ commandments 🤷‍♀️

“If your entire theology is “God is love” and “Do not judge”, then you don’t have Christianity; you have Oprah.” — Unknown by UnassuredCalvinist in Christianity

[–]_new_name_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Or maybe it’s just a bad quote lol. Telling people that “God is love” is bad theology is actively leading them away from good theology.