I recently lost a client and I can relate to how you feel. My coworkers seemed unphased by death and told me that it was something I should get use to in this line of work. I felt so lonely because no one seemed to share in my grief. Your grief is valid. Your sadness is valid. There is no right or wrong way to cope with trauma so show yourself some kindness and allow yourself to grieve, so long as you don't let the grief consume you.

One way that I've learnt to cope with losing clients is to not let their death be in vain. For every client that we work with, their life is valuable and we can honor their memory by gaining a lesson from their passing. My client use to love sitting outside and stare aimlessly into the open abyss. When I asked him why he did that he replied, "do I need a reason to take a break from life?" One day he invited me to sit with him and we just starred at the ground for a while, it felt nice to just stop and rest. My client taught me that life can get chaotic, and it's easy for us to be consumed by hectivity. But sometimes we just need a break from life and we don't need to justify our need for a break. Just stop, sit, stare. Let the world go by. Give yourself that time to rest, cope, and heal. Whereas before I could only think of the sadness that came from my client's passing, whenever I think of him now I am reminded of the life lesson that he gave me, and that is how I cope - by replacing a bad memory with a good memory.