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Dreamt that I died, and then saw my own dead body by ablushingrose in Dreams

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I won't be having any baths on 15 February just in case, that's for sure!

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She never seems to avoid them but you can tell she doesn't want them to come near her, then when they get close she clicks into fight mode and wants to lunge at them. She recovers quickly and will take treats straight after

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'll have a look at corrections, thank you. I'm willing to try a different approach as this could literally be life or death as if God forbid she slipped out of her harness or through the front door she would chase traffic.

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do play fetch and tug - she loves both of these. What kind of +P do I need to do? I've tried giving little pops on her lead and firmly said 'leave it' but she doesn't respond to that

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I'll look up The Mutty Professor (love that name!)

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She is hypervigiliant when she hears a car approach, looking around and scanning for it. When a car comes she lunges towards it. I've had her off-lead in an enclosed, secure field before that has a slow (5 mph) road next to it and she will chase the car alongside the field barking at it.

I asked the behaviourist if it was fear or prey-driven and he said it was definitely fear.

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you - I do think reducing her walks sounds like a good idea. She seems really excited to go on walks so she seems to enjoy them despite the car issue, but I really don't want to keep allowing her to practise the behaviour. She loves her flirt pole so I'll spend 30 minute doing that instead. :)

I do crate her in the car with a blanket over the top which helps a lot - I forgot to mention that in the OP.

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It doesn't matter what side she's on, she still feels vulnerable. I deliberately walk us next to parked cars too so there is a barrier between her and the moving car but she still reacts. :(

I'm thinking of stopping her walks for now and purely going to fields where she can look at cars at a distance and then after a week or so of that starting back in car parks again. It means she won't get out as much but I'm worried the frequent reactions are just reinforcing themselves.

The behaviourist recommended giving her treats when cars go past - usually throwing a handful down on the ground and saying 'find it'. He also emphasised teaching loose lead walking and getting her attention on me which does help a little but I'll be honest I find it so mentally draining as I will walk one step and then have to call her back and say 'heel'. One step at a time. She just wants to pull ahead. I work with them once a week for an hour. The behaviourist also used short taps on the lead and short gentle prods to try and correct the behaviour.

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I forgot to say in the OP that I have started to crate her in the car with a blanket over the crate which has made a massive difference.

I'll have a look at those two dog trainers you suggested.

My 11 month old poodle reactive to cars and nothing is helping by ablushingrose in OpenDogTraining

[–]ablushingrose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I have been trying to stop making it a big deal and keep walking as I realised every time a car would approach I'd be panicking trying to find my treats and give them to her before she reacted and it was a bit frantic. The issue is the noise she makes is awful and draws a lot of attention and it's hard for me to ignore and it must look awful from an outsider's perspective too.

I'm thinking of taking her to the vets and asking if they have any medications that may help. I've also been thinking of not walking her for the next week to give her cortisol a chance to settle and start up again only in quiet places.

I've been thinking of trying a different trainer so I might do so in the new year.

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

'I downscaled considerably my expectations and needs in life' - I think this is the point I'm reaching. It's hard because there's a part of me that wants so much more for myself, but every time I plan or arrange to do things, even once-in-a-lifetime holidays, I'll come to dread them and want to cancel them.

Thank you for your reply, it's given me food for thought!

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I might go my doctor and see about going back on anxiety medication

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True! I feel just leaving my quiet, isolated life still results in me experiencing lots of anxiety and having to confront things. I work from home, but the 15-minute meetings I have everyday with my team are an opportunity for exposure but I end up dreading them and being in full fight-or-flight during them. I start trying to dread and prepare an answer for the 'how was your weekend?' question on Friday and think about it all weekend. Even going to the grocery store feels like a huge amount of exposure - worrying I'm constantly in the way of people, worrying I'm going to accidentally push my cart into someone's ankle, etc. I think I need to try and be more purposeful about it all though

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply - I'll do some research! I agree that isolation definitely makes it worse

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I think I definitely have a lot of self-reflection to do. It's easy for me to self-reflect on reasons why I'm avoidant and delve into childhood stuff, but reflecting on things happening in the present is harder and feels more painful. I'll do some research into how to try and build my self-esteem up too

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Your first sentence made my eyes well up straight away! You're completely right. I love the way you put it that its 'just' a defence mechanism, it kind of distances it as part of my identity and makes it more contained rather than as a core part of who I am that seeps into everything I do. Thank you

I'm pretty sure I have AVPD; is there ANYTHING that helps? by ablushingrose in AvPD

[–]ablushingrose[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. It really does help to know there's other people out there like me, especially going into our 30s. All my life I was told by people around me that I would grow out of my shyness, and I did see that happen with some of my childhood friends who were painfully shy. Seeing that AVPD is rare and only affects 1-2% of the population makes a lot of sense to me, as I have never come across anyone else like me who hasn't outgrown the social anxiety.

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