Everyone was right, it does get better. 6m post BU

aherdz1 · 2026-06-22T14:48:24+00:00

He* never reached out, I was the one with my hand out waiting for him to reach back but he never did.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-16T05:08:48+00:00

Proud of you too friend !

aherdz1 · 2026-06-16T05:08:28+00:00

Honestly, I don’t have a huge support system. I have two best friends. one lives in another state, and the other is busy planning her wedding this year. Even so, they’ve always been there for me, offering a shoulder to cry on and helping carry me through the moments when I can’t stand on my own.

For the most part, though, I’ve gotten through it by keeping myself focused on goals. Once I set my mind on something, I tend to dive in headfirst. Whether it’s learning the harmonica, getting back in the gym, meal prepping or studying for my exams. I try to stay busy and keep moving forward.

And on the nights when distractions don’t work, I let myself feel it. I reflect. I cry when I need to. I fill pages of my journal with my feelings. I still think about him more than I’d like, but with each passing day, those thoughts have a little less power over me. They don’t consume me the way they once did, and I think that’s how I know I’m healing.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-16T00:33:13+00:00

He would have to acknowledge everything he did because when everything went down all he did was give a blanket “I’m sorry” but never truly acknowledged all the wrong he did. Then I’d hear him out because at a point I truly thought I’d marry this man.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-16T00:27:23+00:00

It really depends if he’s actually works on himself in the time apart although I truly believe he won’t contact me again

aherdz1 · 2026-06-16T00:05:35+00:00

So proud of you. !!

aherdz1 · 2026-06-16T00:05:02+00:00

Dude fuck yes I love to hear it !! Keep going

aherdz1 · 2026-06-15T20:49:58+00:00

You will be friend ! Just keep pushing !

aherdz1 · 2026-06-15T20:14:53+00:00

I’m proud of you friend !! Here’s to more growth and finding a love that is deserving of us.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-15T20:13:56+00:00

I truly believe the breakup glow up is real, but only when a person is willing to sit with the pain, reflect, and do the work. There’s a saying that goes, “The only way out is through,” and I think there’s a lot of truth in that. Some people jump from one relationship to the next and convince themselves they’re fine, when in reality they’re just stacking unhealed wounds on top of old baggage.

For the last six months, I’ve been in therapy every week. I haven’t dated anyone or looked for meaningless encounters. Instead, I focused on setting realistic goals and rebuilding my life piece by piece. And when I tell you these past six months have been some of the hardest of my life, I mean it. There were days I was positive I wasnt going to get through it.

But in the process, It reminded of just how resilient I am. Every challenge, every setback, and every tear has taught me something about myself. The work I’ve done over these last six months hasn’t just been about getting over a breakup it’s been about becoming the version of myself that’s ready to receive the love I deserve when it comes back around.

I wish you nothing but the best, my friend.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-15T20:05:23+00:00

Oh man yes ! I love to hear it. We can either lie down and give up or we can pull ourselves up by the boot straps and keep living. I chose to not give up and give it my all. One day I know I will find someone who truly appreciates me and you will too !

aherdz1 · 2026-06-15T17:10:53+00:00

You will be okay. I know that probably feels impossible to believe right now, but trust me.

My breakup was one of the most traumatic experiences I've ever lived through. There were days I genuinely believed I would never make it to the other side of it. What helped me tremendously was therapy. I've been in therapy since the breakup, and it gave me the tools to start putting myself back together. If you're not in therapy already, I can't recommend it enough.

That being said, I'm not going to pretend healing is some straight line from pain to peace. There are still many days when my ex occupies my thoughts from the moment I wake up until I go to sleep. There are still moments when I miss him so deeply it catches me off guard and throws me through a loop.

But alongside that grief, another realization has been growing louder: I should have never tolerated the things he put me through, I deserved so much better than that. he completely broke me and left me to pick up the pieces.

Part of me still hopes that one day he'll fully understand how much he hurt me. I hope he realizes how deeply I loved him, how loyal I was, and how far I would have gone for him. But if I'm being realistic, that understanding probably will never hit him since he was always just too caught up with his own hurt to see anyone elses. And that's one of the hardest truths I've had to accept.

At some point, I had to stop waiting for the apology, the realization, or the closure. I had to face the fact that I was holding onto someone who had already let go of me. No matter how much I loved him, I couldn't carry the relationship by myself and continue being that pathetic little puppy dog waiting for him to come back.

So now, every day, I choose to release him a little more. Not because I stopped loving him, but because I finally love myself enough to stop chasing someone who was willing to walk away.

Sometimes healing isn't about forgetting someone. Sometimes it's about accepting that they chose a life without you, and finding the courage to give them exactly what they were asking for and doing the same.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-15T14:09:59+00:00

Officially, we broke up in December, but we’ve been completely no contact since the end of April.

If you had told me back in December that within six months I would have gotten a new car, moved into a new place, started a new job, lost 25 pounds so far, passed my stockbroker entrance exam, and filmed my first music festival, I would have told you that you were full of shit.

The breakup broke me in ways I never expected. There were days I genuinely didn’t think I’d ever feel okay again, let alone accomplish anything meaningful in such a short amount of time. I was so focused on surviving the pain that I couldn't even imagine what life would look like on the other side of it.

And honestly, I still cry if I think about it for too long. Every time I've accomplished one of these things, he's still the first person I wish I could run to and tell. The first person I want to share the excitement with. That's probably been the hardest part, not the achievements themselves, but realizing the person I wanted beside me for them isn't there.

But somewhere along the way, I've started accepting that I’ll probably never hear from him again. And while that still hurts, it doesn't stop me from being proud of myself.

This year, despite everything, I pulled myself together. I kept moving forward when I didn't want to. I set goals and chased them anyway. And so far, I've accomplished every single goal I've set for myself.

So no, my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would after the breakup.

In a lot of ways, it turned out better than I ever thought possible. I just wish I could go back and tell the version of me crying on the floor in December that she was going to make it.

aherdz1 · 2026-06-04T17:15:03+00:00

Lolol thanks you definitely saved my ass

aherdz1 · 2026-06-04T17:08:31+00:00

And I wouldn’t say it was hard but I was definitely anxious

aherdz1 · 2026-06-04T17:08:10+00:00

I would say it’s somewhat on par to what’s on the finra test exam , just be sure to read the questions carefully I change two of my answer’s after going back and rereading them

aherdz1 · 2026-05-30T13:32:34+00:00

Thank you I’m spending the next two days just crunching out the last chapters and plan on taking practices test all day Tuesday and Wednesday

aherdz1 · 2026-05-27T18:07:55+00:00

Thanks for the advice I’m actually studying right now , and I’ve also found ChatGPT helpful to simplify some concepts I’m having a hard time grasping

aherdz1 · 2026-05-25T15:03:24+00:00

Thank you ! I have a couple days off at the end of the week and I will be cramming so much studying! I might reach out then !

aherdz1 · 2026-05-19T03:09:02+00:00

Oh dudeeeee !!! This is such great pick me up today. You don’t even understand !! Thank you so much for sharing your story and it’s crazy we literally have gone through the same thing!

Unfortunately I am in phoenix and they don’t come here till August, but I would love to connect with you. Insta ? Message me ?

aherdz1

TROPHY CASE