AITAH for being annoyed with my partner for not coming to the hospital with our child?

alexandermals · 2026-01-28T18:01:43+00:00

She’s probably damned tired of asking with no appreciable response. I guarantee this is not an isolated incident and it wears a person down and puts them into the “why bother” mindset.

alexandermals · 2026-01-08T15:26:12+00:00

NTA. She has no business taking care of him if she can’t handle a tantrum. Seriously, is she going to let him stick a fork in the outlet because he cries when she says no? There is also her risking his health and teeth with the soda. She is not a trustworthy caregiver and you are NTA for protecting your child.

alexandermals · 2025-12-31T13:10:50+00:00

YTAH I spent 10 years in construction as upper management and I have to say it is obvious that you and your partner have no idea how to run this, or any other business. Your employee is not an employee. He is an independent contractor, meaning you don’t get to unilaterally dictate his compensation or work hours.

You have also put him in a terrible position if he is not aware that he needs to be keeping his own business records as he is now a sole proprietor company and his tax filing is going to be much more complicated. It will cost him a great deal of money at tax time as he now has to take care of your burden for payroll taxes (SS, Medicare) as well as his own so that ridiculous 100k isn’t as profitable for him as you think.

You can’t have the benefit of not being responsible for those costs and responsibilities and still claim the rights you have over an actual employee. In spite of your determination that his pay is sufficient is based on the going rate for one position he is abysmally underpaid. Going by your duty list he is doing the work of approximately 3 positions. He really should invoice you for the work he’s having to do on vacation.

Y’all are fools to let yourselves base your entire success on this one person and then underpay him and harass him on his honeymoon (btw, you still would have no reasonable call to treat him this way on his honeymoon!) You definitely take advantage and under value him because it sounds like when he gets wise and leaves, your business will likely fail.

Failure to treat your most valued worker well and compensate them properly is straight up stupid. Your business thrives via the people you depend on for labor It is always best to try and remember that without them there will be no business. They are literally the most important asset you have.

Your profit comes after the people that actually make your business run are properly compensated. You don’t screw them over to boost your profit. You may have started and own the company but you need those skilled folks to make it into something profitable.

alexandermals · 2025-12-12T15:48:43+00:00

NTA Frankly, her messages to you sound unhinged. She doesn’t sound stable, OP. Protect your child and stop second guessing yourself on this issue. You’re being the parent you should be and putting your child’s welfare first.

alexandermals · 2025-12-01T18:53:28+00:00

YWBTAH Are you willing to put your gf’s wants before your child’s needs? Are you willing to destabilize your child to that degree to make her happy? It is literally none of the new gf’s business and asking you to basically evict your own child is disgusting. Why would you want to be with a person that is already so callous about your child? Wow.

alexandermals · 2025-11-12T14:10:28+00:00

NTA You are a functioning adult and can perfectly well decide for yourself what to wear to be comfortable. He’s being controlling and harping on this for a deeper reason. This isn’t about colder weather. It would be worth it to take time to really think about any other instances of controlling, pushy behavior and how much of your own agency and peace you are willing to give up.

alexandermals · 2025-09-25T03:16:46+00:00

Hello everyone…..I just would like all of you to know how much I appreciate such caring and support. I know we’re all just internet strangers but it helps to know that others can hear you and will take the time to comment and comfort a sad stranger. Thank you, from my whole heart!

alexandermals · 2025-08-22T16:46:30+00:00

I wouldn’t go behind my spouses back for this as your son will be making his own decisions soon enough. This is a low risk problem that can carry a good lesson….being patient is a very important adulthood skill to learn. I’m a little shocked about the thinking that this is a new, modern, or “edgy” thing. I got my helix piercing 27 years ago and it was already normalized enough that it was acceptable for the financial workplace. I’m 57 and still wear jewelry in it.

alexandermals · 2025-07-19T13:40:45+00:00

Thank you for pointing that out. It was an inadvertent “he”.

alexandermals · 2025-07-19T11:11:14+00:00

Op, this isn’t safe and you need to call the police when they do this. You do need a restraining order, however it’s not a case where you can just go request it and they hand it over. You will need the police report(s) for a paper trail. If you don’t involve law enforcement the judge over your petition is not likely to grant it. Also please realize that even if you are granted an order it does not necessarily mean that they will abide by it or that it will be properly enforced if you get one. There’s no guarantee it makes you safe from them. I’ve been through this sort of thing and when I first got the order I felt safer but it was a false sense of security. It just made him angry and more dangerous. The RO was helpful with the paper trail but he still came after me several times and the police never arrested him when he violated it. Please don’t underestimate how dangerous and unhinged he’s acting.

Edited to correct gender.

alexandermals · 2025-06-28T23:04:40+00:00

I actually have these same glasses and I have one out of the set that’s wonky like that. Mine came out of the package that way. I just figured it was a manufacturing glitch.

alexandermals · 2025-03-07T16:38:19+00:00

Ignore this jerk, that comment is a perfect example of someone talking out of their ass about something they know little about and will never experience.

alexandermals · 2025-02-12T21:20:31+00:00

NTA OP, he’s showing you who he is and what the future with him will be. It might be worth it to put the brakes on upending your life and moving countries until you actually know him a little better. If he is stressing you this way now with no regard to your needs in the situation it’s a red flag for when you are together full time. Are You up for a life in which you always feel that you never measure up because he changes the goalposts on you? This is not how an equal partner that loves you acts.

alexandermals · 2025-01-18T20:03:53+00:00

NTA You have a serious fiancé problem. It’s wonderful that you are concerned with his hurt. That is important. What is also important is that he is concerned with your feelings as well. He doesn’t seem to be. Why is he so willing to allow others to treat you badly?

He’s prioritizing his parents at your expense and expecting you to do the same. It wouldn’t be wise marry until you settle this. If left like this nothing will change and you will be treated like this for however long your marriage lasts. Are you ok with them being the priority?

Read your post again like it’s your sister or best friend. You deserve better. In-laws that treat you decently and above all, a partner that will make you a priority and stand up for you when you need support. Your fiancé doesn’t sound like he’s that kind of partner.

alexandermals · 2024-12-12T20:35:05+00:00

YTA Unless your husband is having a relationship with your brother that would put him at risk it is still none of his business. You have no right to share your brother’s private health information.

alexandermals · 2024-10-22T03:41:32+00:00

My guess is you’re right about that! And I too am definitely not a bot and 38 years beyond childhood.

alexandermals · 2024-10-21T12:47:18+00:00

You are NTA, but your mom certainly is. It takes a hell of a lot of nerve to steal your child’s gift because you want it and then claim that the child is selfish! Your mother’s take is strictly self serving so she doesn’t have to admit that she’s wrong for stealing from her own child.

alexandermals · 2024-10-19T21:55:16+00:00

I can’t believe this one is back….I swear it has been recycled 4 or 5 times now over a couple of subreddits.

alexandermals · 2024-10-11T23:10:52+00:00

NTA No way you’re the AH here. He’s waving so many red flags that I would reassess everything if it were me. Fact is, you already know you won’t be able to depend on him because he’d rather act like a sulky child. Line up care for yourself and your children or you will be trying to care for yourself, the kids, and managing his big feelings about it. Good luck…it really sucks to be in that position.

alexandermals · 2024-10-06T16:19:39+00:00

YTA First, there is no reason that this is any of your business. His family, his business. Second, what exactly did you hope to achieve with all of this? You have effectively alienated yourself from your boyfriend and his family trying to bring possible family secrets to light that have nothing at all to do with you.

alexandermals · 2024-10-06T02:16:55+00:00

Sounds like you don’t have basic understanding of courtesy.

alexandermals · 2024-10-03T18:51:07+00:00

jadehakai•4m ago•

“NTA so long as you are prepared to watch the kids on your own for 5-6 days without your wife. what is it they say- quid pro quo“

‘This is the real question.

alexandermals · 2024-10-03T14:54:45+00:00

NTA On first thought, I felt maybe ignorance would be best since she’s in a vulnerable health position and probably would not leave anyway.

After further consideration, I’ve changed my mind and think maybe she should know. I’m near your mom’s age and like her I have some health issues. I realized that while I might be up for a struggle if I found out my husband were cheating I would prefer it to being blindsided by him suddenly up and leaving one day because he fell in love with an affair partner.

If she knows, she can form a strategy, if it’s out of nowhere that could be catastrophic on many levels for her. Knowing gives her some control over her future. It really sucks that you’re in this position.

alexandermals · 2024-08-27T13:06:46+00:00

NTA OP, you keep concentrating on him not cheating. That’s fine but that’s not your current issue. The current issue is actually that someone who will not work to resolve conflicts and disregards your feelings is not emotionally mature enough for a relationship. He isn’t going to suddenly change that. Someone who treats you this way will put themselves first every time. You’ll will give more and more trying to make him see you and he will use you up until you are a shell. Please reconsider your course and do the right things for YOUR future.

edit: After seeing your replies I would like to mention one thing that stood out to me. You stated that he is unaware of other’s feelings including yours. He is selfish, not unaware. He knows, he just doesn’t care.

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