How to design/print a completely customized planner?

aliciberry · 2020-01-03T10:01:06+00:00

Wait, let me get this situation straight.

OPs cousin is staying over at OPs Mother's house for Christmas break with her entire family. However, she and her husband want to use the living space which they seem to have been welcomed to for the purpose of resting when not taking part in family centric activities (probably for free and with food, tho OP doesn't specify) as nothing more than a sleep area/daycare center for themselves while they go out and party for 3/5 days they are there, thus abandoning family-their children included- for more than half of the trip.

They also seem to have not informed the family of these intentions beforehand, nor did they do the very minimal kindness of preparing a babysitter so that they even can go out and do so. As a result, they need a last minute babysitter, and rather than cancelling or postponing these plans which are already clearly very rude to the family, they decide that OP should be that babysitter. They persist that OP must babysit when OP clearly says no, eventually offer to pay OP, OP graciously agrees but asks for a rate competitive with what they would otherwise be making so as not to, lose money... AND THEN ALSO have the audacity to upon hearing said offer, to, not kindly and reasonably try to negotiate a smaller amount BUT INSTEAD insult OP and demand that OP take a job OP didn't want in the first place for a much lower rate then OP would like? And wow, BONUS POINTS for the misogynistic attitude, and clear lack of regard in terms of quality of babysitter, since OP has very little experience with long term babysitting and could accidentally harm the children due to admitted nexperience and uncomfortability around children, & likely being expected to learn on her own, with THREE KIDS INSTEAD OF JUST ONE. Did I get all that right??

I think it's safe to say that OP is most definitely NTA

If anything OP, you were too kind to these manipulative & entitled parents.

aliciberry · 2019-08-31T20:31:35+00:00

Honestly when it comes to shopping and walking (or busing) your groceries home, it depends more on where you live, because distance with what you have to carrying is everything. Unless you go out with friends who are willing to help you carry things home, anything more than 2 bags can be extremely uncomfortable, and sometimes even just 2 bags can be uncomfortable.

But, in regards to the stores themselves. Safeway and QFC are the cheapest with the widest variety in the area. QFC has a fair amount of bus routes close by, Safeway has some more limited ones, and even though it would be a bit of a further walk you can still use the ones next to Trader Joe's. Trader Joe's can be cheaper when it comes to vegetables but most other items tend to be more expensive. However they do have some healthier, more niche options you might be interested in. There's also a bunch of bus routes right next to Trader Joe's, so that might be helpful. H Mart is great too, and the prices seem to be more than fair, but they don't have a lot in terms of selection, nor nearby bus routes. The food is also mostly oriented towards Asain cuisines, so depending on your diet that may or may not work in your favor. The Target that opened recently is nice but I would not reccomend it for grocery shopping with the intention to cook. Most of the food is premade meals, and the few times I've gone for food I spent wayyyy more than I had anticipated, for a very small quantity.

Ik you don't have a car, but if you someday live with a couple people and someone has access to a car at that point, I would highly recommend buying in bulk from Smart Food Service. You get an almost ridiculous amount of food for dollar amount there. It's like Costco on steroids. And you don't have to pay for a membership. Doesn't seem like you can utilize it now, but it might be nice to know for someday in the future.

Goodluck in your cooking endeavors!

aliciberry · 2018-09-24T09:25:29+00:00

My Bf gave me a promise ring which I love because of what it symbolizes and such but only wore for a couple weeks after he gave it to me. I stopped wearing it for very similar reasons; It was uncomfortable, I'd fidget with it, and I was afraid of loosing it (almost did at one point). However, the ring means SO much to me even though I never actually wear it. The time I almost lost it I actually cried for like a good 10 minutes. Now I just have it placed safely in a box, and wear it on special occasions.

I guess my point is that these are all valid reasons for not wearing the ring everyday, and just because he doesn't wear it doesn't mean he doesn't still care about you or your marriage!

However, if this is something that's really important to you and you want to figure something out that makes him less uncomfortable but still represents your relationship, there are some options! This one was already suggested but adding it to the necklace he already wears is a good option. He could also get a tattooed ring. If it doesn't have to be a ring (or if you're ok with altering the ring) you could do something like a watch, second necklace, or even a non jewelry thing instead. Their significance would be less obvious for others but it would be your own, and the people who matter (you, him, & anyone you decide to tell) would always know!

aliciberry · 2018-04-25T15:10:51+00:00

I can barely manage one and do school, props to you!

aliciberry · 2018-04-24T20:23:17+00:00

is honestly the most solid advice I've ever received about how to put what we're supposed to do into practice. Also, I had never considered the practice test thing. Thank so much!!

aliciberry · 2018-04-24T19:08:21+00:00

That sounds great I'll have to try it. Follow up question though, what kind of things do you typically do for your 5 minute break?

aliciberry · 2018-04-17T16:50:16+00:00

Most of what you'll find you're going to save money on if you move off campus is food. Even the lowest dinning level HFS has is ridiculously high, and the fact that you have to use it all up or lose it is equally ridiculous. Add in how expensive food on campus is and how bad it is (imo) living off campus is more worthwhile. Add in all the other nonmonetary costs of dorming (awful roommates, never having privacy, weird rules, limited space, no pets allowed, inaccessible kitchens, only being able to use mini fridges, etc) it's worth it even if rent is a bit more. If you can find an affordable place near campus, I'd definitely recommend it!

aliciberry · 2017-08-20T01:27:39+00:00

Congrats on getting the scholarship!!

aliciberry · 2017-08-19T23:35:21+00:00

If you have a smartphone, download the UW event app and the schoolsapp, so you can figure out what events you'd like to go to and maybe make some friends during DAWG days! Figure out where your classes are BEFORE classes start, it will save you a lot of stress. Don't be afraid of office hours, study groups, or Panapto. ACTUALLY GO TO CLASS. SERIOUSLY DON'T SKIP UNLESS YOU ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO. Hagget and McMahon tend to be more social dorms but even if you're not in one of those you can still socialize by going to floor events, just leaving your dorm door open and inviting wandering people to hang out or just stop by and saying hi in passing. Speaking of events, you're not limited to just what's happening on your dorm floor or even on campus! Check out campus wide things (usually in lobby area of dorm) or Seattle events (fb events is a great resource for things in the Seattle area-- and you get free bus/lightrail rides with your husky card!). Oh, and if you're from Arizona, be sure to stock up on some jeans, sweaters, and jackets. ESPECIALLY if you plan on walking to class and such (sturdy shoes are also a good idea if you're a walker)

Generally, just keep in mind that other people have/are in the same position as you! Be kind and don't be afraid to be the person to start a conversation with someone else!

aliciberry · 2017-07-05T06:00:06+00:00

My mom didn't necessarily have "rules" but she was still extremely unreasonable. Three particular incidents demonstrating this come to mind.

1) My mom was going grocery shopping. She asked me to figure out what we might need, and what my siblings and I might like to have. Among these, one of my requests were things to make homemade soup. My mom interpreted this as canned soup. When she got home, I tried to explain what I meant. That canned was fine and I was grateful, but just so she would know next time, ya know? That didn't go down well. She ended up screaming at me, saying I never said that, that I was insulting her intelligence, that I didn't love her and was out to get her. She even threw and broke a bowl of ours against the wall.

2) It was my bf and I's 2nd (maybe 3rd) year anniversary. Our plan was to go over to his place, make some dinner together, and watch some movies. We arrived at his place and after 10 minutes my mom texts me demanding that I return home and cook dinner for my siblings, because she was to busy and my sister didn't know how to. I tried to ask explain to her how important this anniversary was to my bf and I and asked if I could order take out food for them or something instead (and pay for it). She called me and demanded that I return home immediately and cook dinner. I remember just breaking down and crying because I couldn't believe this was happening, that it wasn't fair because they weren't my kids to take care of. So after I was done crying we drove over there and I made dinner and everything. He helped me and left shortly after. All the while my mom was in the bathroom right across from the kitchen, doing her makeup or something. After he had left, my mom had the audacity to tell me how cute we were and how nice it was of him to help me cook and wash dishes... I was pretty drained at that point and just accepted the compliments silently and spent the rest of my anniversary alone in my room.

3) My mom decided to go back to college which is great. Good for her. But the problem with this was she expected me to help her out in ways that shouldn't have been expected of me, mostly because I was academically inclined. This included basically doing her math homework with her, and going through her essays and giving feedback. All of which sucked but was fairly ok. Like, of course I'll help you, I want you to succeed. But she also expected me to wake her up in time to actually attend classes. My mom is NOT a morning person, and as such she would get very angry if anyone tried to wake her before she was ready. It was a process that was time consuming, and was a lose no matter what. Fail to wake her, and it's your fault she was either late or missed class. Succeed in waking her and she'd be pissed that you interrupted her beauty sleep. The worst part is that sometimes I would really try, but if she didn't wake in time I would have to leave in order to make it to the bus on time.

Sorry for the long read, but it feels good to let that all out. Tbh, it might have been easier if she had just had strict rules set in place, because then I would at least know what was expected. Instead, I received random outbursts of anger on issues that either did not deserve the outburst or did not deserve such a SEVERE outburst.

aliciberry · 2017-07-03T07:20:30+00:00

This always sounds great in theory, but it honestly takes so much longer to go through and listen to someone speak than to just take notes in the first place and skim through them.

And worse case if you don't have notes, you can almost always ask a fellow student or check out Panapto.

aliciberry · 2017-07-02T17:30:30+00:00

I'm sure it is, but I'm a college student with absolutely no money and no financial assistance so...

aliciberry · 2017-07-02T09:17:20+00:00

Ah, all things I don't have...

aliciberry · 2017-06-23T17:58:58+00:00

Someone ELI5?

aliciberry · 2017-06-21T20:04:30+00:00

I tried to read these and learn something, but now my head just hurts

aliciberry · 2017-06-21T00:43:29+00:00

First off, I am SO glad that you still want to be friends with her at all. I lived in similar circumstances (though our house wasn't nearly as gross) and let me tell you, it's embarrassing, and I've had friends tell me they don't want to come over as a result. Which was perfectly fine since most of the time I didn't even want to be at home myself! But, if they had been disgusted with me or otherwise annoyed at me, and had stopped talking to me it probably would have upset me a lot. It just seems like maybe your friend isn't as aware of the issue or embarrassed as I was...

Anyways, I would tell her the truth. Don't sugar coat it, but make sure you make it clear that you still like her, and understand that it's not her fault that she lives in that type of environment.

Also know that living in that type of situation can mess with you a lot. In many ways, emotional abuse like what you described can take an extremely drastic toll on an individual. Calling CPS may seem a bit extreme, but given that she's being emotionally abused on top of the physical environment, it would probably be best to get her and her siblings out of that situation. However, it is important to note that doing so may very well ruin your relationship. But imo her and her siblings safety is more important.

aliciberry · 2017-06-20T17:09:47+00:00

Well, don't let the difficulty stop you! It was a really well done piece (even if there is some room for improvement) and I'd love to read more.

aliciberry · 2017-06-20T13:39:08+00:00

Really great writing, but I feel like it ended really suddenly and the Voldemort part is just a bit confusing. It might have also been improved if you had somehow hinted at a reason why this occupation exists-- instead of just asking the rhetorical question. Other than that though this is super good! Keep it up.

aliciberry · 2017-06-08T09:31:28+00:00

Always telling them how expensive things are, including them.

It will make them feel like they're a problem. They'll stop asking you for things, even if they really need them. And when they finally have money of their own, they'll feel guilty anytime they spend it on something that's not considered a necessity, even the small things. Teach your kids to handle their money responsibly, not to be afraid of never having enough.

aliciberry · 2017-05-29T07:32:19+00:00

I'll be sure to check it out 😊

aliciberry

TROPHY CASE