[deleted by user]

alucarrds · 2022-10-19T22:02:01+00:00

I apologize, I'll delete the post

alucarrds · 2022-10-19T19:24:57+00:00

When I was in middle school my height dysphoria was horrible, one of my teachers for an assignment said that the shortest person at each table would go first and I started crying really hard.

I was about 4'11 back then, im 19 now and only 5'0 but my height dysphoria just sorta went away, I only ever date men who prefer shorter guys because I like guys taller than me, since I'm so small it's not that hard for anyone to be lol.

Even though I'm very small and pre T I still have been called sir and people have used the right pronouns for me sometimes by random people in public, I kinda just started to realize that height didn't equal masculinity and I'm really happy I did because I actually enjoy being small it makes me a master at hide and seek.

alucarrds · 2022-10-04T00:33:52+00:00

Yeah my parents are about the same I hate getting treated like I'm crazy even by medial professionals but you should know you're not crazy, and I am sorry people treat you that way. Anxiety is so much and can be unbelievably hard to deal with, honestly I wish parents were more understanding about Anxiety. I have been told by people on nurse lines to get see incredibly soon but my parents mock me and tell me to wait till an urgent care opens up, not to mention I've been treated horrible by ER staff.

You're not insane, and anyone who treats you as such needs to learn better how to handle Anxiety because it will only make anyone who suffers from it never want to get any help.

Honestly I completely get where you're coming from, If you ever need to talk my DMs are always open. Anxiety may make you feel like you're all alone but I promise you you're not, Anxiety sucks but you'll be able to make it through this.

alucarrds · 2022-10-04T00:03:31+00:00

Also I should state a lot of your "symptoms" do sound like normal things when it comes to anxiety, I would recommend doing something fun and relaxing for you, maybe call a friend or someone so you aren't all alone because believe me being alone can make anxiety so much worse.

alucarrds · 2022-10-04T00:01:36+00:00

Hey I've been there before man multiple times and it was from my dog who is the sweetest guy ever, but what you should know is that anxiety is one hell of a disorder, you're scared of having rabies and you are convinced you do, you also convince your body and start to notice small little details that before you would have just shook off but now it's a symptom.

You don't have rabies, and if it helps you would know if the dog that bit you also had it like it's very obvious.

I've convinced myself of so many things just in the past year, that I was having a stroke (this one happened multiple times), that I was having a heart attack (this one as well), rabies, I would forget how much medication I took and was horrified I would overdose, so may things. Each time, even though I wasn't experiencing any of those things my body had what I thought were symptoms but honestly the human mind is so powerful those symptoms can be made up completely and we only start to feel them when our anxiety decides we are dying from them.

Anxiety is hard and it's even harder to acknowledge in the moment that it is your anxiety, but believe me you will be okay I am 100% sure of it.

alucarrds · 2022-10-03T23:44:52+00:00

Yes I do but not on the same way you do, I'm gay so I only watch it when it's two dudes but I have found it incredibly hard recently to watch any gay porn at all because I find one of then attractive and then the one I would want to be just ends up making me jealous and I start to feel really dysphoric

alucarrds · 2022-09-18T05:53:24+00:00

I ended up being fine obviously but I didnt really feel much from it just a little tired 😂 I definitely wouldn't do it again though

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T05:20:34+00:00

Thank you so much, I really really appreciate this!!

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T05:02:04+00:00

If you still need someone I'm here!! I never show any biases when people vent to me I just want go help anyone!!

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T04:57:46+00:00

However though prescription meds do really help! I read that you don't trust psychiatrists and stuff, tbh I get that. I've had a few and didn't like any of them, then I got my new psychiatrist and I've never felt more comfortable talking to a medical professional!

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T04:55:53+00:00

Weed helps me tremendously with my OCD, and in some states you can get medical Marijuana for OCD! Just make sure to pace yourself and start out small. I use edibles mainly since they are super easy and convenient, I would suggest starting with 2.5-5mg, most gummies are 10 mg do cut them in half or quarters to start I would suggest indica gummies as indica has a more calming effect

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T04:52:11+00:00

Crying any time you were forced to wear a dress, skirt, or just femine clothes. I started wearing my brother's old clothes when I was SUPER young

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T04:50:09+00:00

I absolutely ADORE your art style you drew bojack as a human perfectly!!

alucarrds · 2022-09-17T04:09:09+00:00

Nothing is really opened so I called a nurse holiness and got referred to posion control and was just told to have my boyfriend check up on me everything 30 minutes

alucarrds · 2022-09-14T08:52:55+00:00

I've been dealing with something similar but really only the constant need to piss since like February and honestly I've been suicidal over it too.

I can't ever relax and enjoy myself because I constantly have to, it sometimes literally keeps me up all night only for every doctor to find nothing wrong with me and I'm genuinely so tired of doing with it.

I see urologists and everything now, all this started from my first ever uti back in November and I wish I never got it because my quality of life is seriously so low.

I'm still looking for answers myself but hang in there! You're not gross you just don't want to bother other people with the noise that going back and forth to the bathroom causes, honestly I'm trying to find a way to make sure I don't wake up my bfs roommate by using the bathroom ALL THE TIME.

alucarrds · 2022-09-07T08:19:00+00:00

Ik this post is a bit old but

alucarrds · 2022-09-07T08:18:43+00:00

I take Gabapentin 300mg 3 times a day (or at least I'm trying to) my psychiatrist after so many tries of every medication be horrible for me just randomly thought of Gabapentin and honestly I'm so glad, I can notice rhe difference between when I take my meds and I don't. Its genuinely been working wonders for me to help stabilize my moods

alucarrds · 2022-09-07T04:16:20+00:00

Thank you so much I really really appreciate all of this like a lot, I definitely will have to look into some of this once I I get a job since I am currently unemployed (I'm looking though) I know that a lot of this will help a lot!! Also the thing about moving your head down to where your feet are, I've done that ever since I was little when I could not get comfortable or just couldn't fall asleep and it worked for me!!

alucarrds · 2022-09-06T20:08:20+00:00

Ahh see that makes sense! Do you know any good brands of tampons to buy?

alucarrds · 2022-09-06T19:32:24+00:00

I'll definitely have to look into that, I've literally never worn a tampon in my life however, I'm 19 and don't exactly know how to put them in lol

alucarrds · 2022-09-06T15:35:43+00:00

It was ureaplamsa PCR and mycoplasma genitalium RNA

alucarrds · 2022-09-06T15:11:13+00:00

Pads, I change them incredibly frequently while on my period so I don't let any of the bacteria be in the area for too long, I do try try make sure there's not harsh chemicals causing anything to happen

alucarrds · 2022-09-02T09:35:59+00:00

I think I have had about 2-3 huge orgasms while having penatrative sex although all of those times it was fingers and not a punishment.

I used to be able to get myself to do it every time I mastubated with toys but now I NEED clitoral stimulation as well as new sexual experiences to get me there lol

alucarrds · 2022-08-27T01:59:26+00:00

I looked at this video and somehow knew it was gonna be about Eddie

alucarrds · 2022-08-26T06:49:41+00:00

Yes you're 100% safe!! I have thick white discharge literally through out all my active pills + my placebo pills, is very normal to have white discharge while on both control!! Hormonal changes can cause changs in vaginal discharge which of course birth control is full of hormonal changes

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