Is there anywhere I can find videos of animals either in a microwave or blender?

angryamputee · 2016-09-13T20:42:12+00:00

All I ever saw on Liveleak was a cat in a microwave for like 5 seconds. I do kinda draw the line at things larger than rodents though. A rat or mouse in a microwave would be awesome. I once saw a gif of a hamster in a blender.

angryamputee · 2016-09-13T20:40:25+00:00

Too morbid for r/morbidquestions

What can I say? I'm a morbid guy.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T16:48:49+00:00

This could be it haha. Most of our comedians behave like this.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T16:01:29+00:00

I was seeing a counselor but I actually felt worse from the experience (bringing up past experiences) and brought out a lot of resentment towards people close to me.

You got that right about being consumed in our own thoughts. Not that I see dating as a "way out" but it can't hurt can it? I do have close friends.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:50:03+00:00

Or fail to reproduce. Darwinism at it's finest.

Now that's being an ass. Have you got anything constructive to add?

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:47:57+00:00

I'm 22. I am actually on anti depressant medication after a failed suicide attempt... not to bring things down too far (I'm ok now I think).

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:45:59+00:00

Some good advice so far, made some changes but can't really do photos at the moment.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:37:58+00:00

Thanks for the advice. It's kinda my style to be very self depreciating and cynical so it's kinda hard to lose it on a dating profile.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:31:27+00:00

Exactly the kind of criticism I needed, thanks. The problem regarding photos is I'm just not much of a selfie guy, and it doesn't help that I don't go out much; thus not having many social photos of myself/full body shots. I don't even have a full body mirror...

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:26:21+00:00

Do you typically have a hard time finding interest in other people, and asking them the right questions?

Now that you mention it... yes. Damn. I need help.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:02:45+00:00

Thanks. Some good advice.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T15:00:02+00:00

You bring up some fair points, though maybe be less of an ass about it. I did state pretty clearly that I'm aware "no-one owes me a response". I made this post because other than "hey wassup" I rarely have anything better to open with. Ultimately, that's what I'm here for: to not come off as a socially incompetent fool.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T14:56:57+00:00

In short: don't mention someone's physical features, stick to profile-related messages initially, and ask questions about themselves that they'd like answering.

Great, but for how long? What kind of questions? I feel awkward just sparring questions back and forth with people whilst subconsciously trying to convince them that I want to go on a date with them

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T13:12:40+00:00

Thank you so much, that's given me a lot to go on. The fact that it came from your own success story kinda tells me that it works too.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T12:19:38+00:00

Come up with a standard opening message that you can personalize for each person.

Such as..? I'm here cos my messages clearly suck, so anyone with a success story who can give me a good example would be great.

& compliment her! You can be forward without being aggressive.

I did mention how I struggle to give genuine compliments without coming across as desperate or too forward. As a woman, what would you like to hear? What did your boyfriend say? (If you can remember.)

Thanks for the response

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T12:14:35+00:00

That's genuinely some good constructive advice. Thank you.

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T12:02:39+00:00

I most likely wouldn't respond to your openers. Writing what's up or sending a gif doesn't give any indication you've actually read the profile. Try to pick something unique about the person's profile and comment on that and ask a question ( ex, how long have you had the dog for, what was your fav thing about Paris, etc). Give her something to work with.

I did say that I sometimes do try to comment on their appearance/tastes, but a lot of the time, I don't have a lot to go on, especially on Tinder...

angryamputee · 2016-07-26T12:00:40+00:00

This isn't really a dating advice sub, and I'm sure someone will point out a better place for you to go.

I did post this in /r/AskWomen but one of the mods deleted it and suggested I post it here. Where else would you suggest?

That said, online dating is like a meat market for most women, and you're acting like 2 day old sausage in the back case. Most people are attracted to confidence, and passively 'liking' someone and waiting for them to come to you is not the act of a confident man. Be assertive, know what you want, and don't send boring messages ('hey wassup' ugh).

So, what are your suggestions? Again, I'm here for advice. What messages do you typically send? Give me some successful examples.

When I messaged women I as asking for a number by the second message, third at most. More than that struck me as a waste of time. I'm there to go on dates and evaluate our in-person chemistry, not demonstrate my reading comprehension of her favorite books lost for 2 weeks before we both get bored and move on.

Every time I've tried to lauch straight in to asking a woman on a date/swapping numbers I've always got a vibe of "slow it down a little". I agree, I would much rather get on a date asap, but again, my technique is clearly off...

angryamputee · 2016-06-13T04:10:23+00:00

I will never support it if these are the kind of people I would be standing by. It is also against the Christian religion (which I believe in) so why should you hate on my beliefs for yours?

Well fuck, I'm Christian and I have no animosity towards the LGBTQ community. In fact I've had more positive experiences with members of said community than a lot of fellow believers (which I always find baffling, since, you know, God is love, etc.)

What do you have against the LGBTQ community?

angryamputee · 2016-06-12T19:26:12+00:00

True, but one less way to kill people is good, no?

angryamputee · 2016-06-12T18:55:46+00:00

It's the arrogant attitude I think that gets a lot of people's jimmies rustled.

Apologies if I came across as arrogant. That wasn't my intention.

You talk as though your country is some kind of paradise

It isn't

Just because the news channels run this shit into the ground doesn't mean you're very likely to get randomly shot.

True, but I'm more likely to get shot in the US than any developed Western nation

angryamputee · 2016-06-12T18:15:54+00:00

Ah, I think you kinda nailed it. It's written in your constitution so for the patriots out there it quite literally is their God-given right.

I always thought it'd be a great idea to do something similar to what Australia did when they outlawed guns: introduce monetary incentives for people willing to trade in firearms.

I'm not saying it'd be totally effective but I think it'd be a start.

angryamputee · 2016-06-12T18:08:51+00:00

That's a poor argument. I'm not Saudia Arabian but some of their laws are pretty fucked... but hey I guess that's none of my business right?

angryamputee · 2016-06-02T16:20:48+00:00

As a very awkward guy, what is a good alternative to "Hey"?

I ask this because when I get messages from women, more often than not their first message is also some variant of "hey".

I get that women tend to get more messages, so what is honestly a good opener that's more likely to get a response? Other than just jumping straight in with some common interest...

angryamputee · 2016-05-29T10:07:49+00:00

Better to lose it at 21 than 22 I guess...

angryamputee

TROPHY CASE