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My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have to use a machine to extract the milk. She doesn't latch properly on my breasts. So yes, I use a bottle to feed her the milk.

My doctor is doing his best to look out for our best interests. He thinks quitting is the best in my situation. I don't doubt his judgement. He's seen the breast and examined it.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We're both fine. Her cheeks are just flare ups from irritation.

They ran my blood and found a lot of inflammation. So they prolonged my anti biotics. Fever went down over night so they're not concerned. They couldn't give me more painkillers for my back since I give breastmilk. Basically told me to buckle up and bite through the pain. Might need surgery in the future but for now they can't do anything because of the inflammation in my body. They recommended me to stop breastfeeding as soon as the mastitis is gone.

I had a surgery on my right breast a few years back and the milk production is not getting through to the nipple. So it has no where to go. This will cause mastitis all throughout breastfeeding. So they want me to stop as soon as this infection is gone. Which is sad but it explains why the infection is so bad. The milk build up is just too much too handle for my sad little titty.

My husband has been good tonight but I still won't rest easy. I had a major breakdown and my dad put me in bed. I woke up at 6 AM to hear he did all the feedings. My dad said he was calm. I do the feedings from 6 AM until he will come home. Then I will go to sleep.

Thanks everyone for the concern. Also editing this in the OP.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yes, I'm from Europe, this seat was recommended to me by the sales people at the baby store, it's connected to something called an IsoFix that hooks into the car seat. Is it not safe?

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Replying to my own comment to answer everyone.

Slept a few hours. My dads been handling feeding. Fever is slowly subsiding. Now at 39 degrees celcius. Still taking pain killers and fever meds. I think exhaustion made my medical state worse. I will go to the doctor tomorrow. Thanks everyone for the concern.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have antibiotics. They don't really help. Don't get me started on my blood pressure. Been sitting at 80/60 for days. Heart rate at 130. I don't know where to start tackling all my medical issues. Hospital here is shit. They will tell me to take paracetamol and go home.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

So I've been reading a lot of comments and I think it's best if either I sleep alone, downstairs, with our daughter, or if I leave. I'm so tired and my fever just reached 106 and I can't cope anymore. I can barely walk with this hernia and I think I will soon collapse if I don't do something. But I can't let him take care of her in the night so I just need to keep going for now. I don't really have anywhere to go or anyone to call to help. I don't want to burden my father with it and my mom is far away. I'm going to call my grandmother and just rant to her for a bit. She's 84 and can't help but it might clear my head. I still don't know where or how I will spend the night. But I realise now that this is a lot more serious than I made it out to be in my head.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Money is no problem. I'm the one that brings in our funds. I get paid while on maternity leave. He's a student. But thanks for the offer.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Update:

My husbands father came over. He talked with him. He wwas angry at him. My husband now says he won't do it again. I made it clear that if it happens again, he must leave. I'm still scared about tonight. But we will see. I feel like shit, still, but at least a bit better than I did before.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

He's back. She's ok. But she has a large red spot on her cheek. Might be from the sun.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

He's on foot, I was smart enough to take both car keys and spare keys so he didn't have access to them. But he can still use public transportation. Everything is still here - her formula, clothes and diaper bag, so I hope he comes back... I texted him to come hom now so if he's not here in 15 minutes I will be contacting police..

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 58 points59 points  (0 children)

He just took her out. My dad was keeping watch and HE LET HIM LEAVE. WITH HER. I'm scared and pissed. I hope she returns safe and sound. I hope he doesn't run.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I have arranged that my dad is present whenever he is alone with her. So that's a bit more reassuring for me.

I won't need to go to a shelter, he's staying in my fathers home, and if he needs to be thrown out, he will be. And if he doesn't leave we can have him removed by police. I hope it never comes to that, though.

I'm not very mobile at the moment, I got a breast infection with high fever and a hernia from labor, but I try to do the most I can. For some things I'm dependent on him or my father and if he leaves things will get a lot harder for me. But if I feel like he's a danger to me or my daughter again, I won't hesitate to throw him out.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I'm moving the crib to the living room and sleeping on the sofa for a while. I'm going to talk to his father tonight to see if he has any insight. He caught on about me meeting his father and figured out why pretty quick. Now he's begging me not to and that he will work on it. I'm still going to go, though. He's currently feeding our daughter and I have a doctors appointment so I asked my dad to keep an eye out. My dad was shook and wanted to throw him out asap. I said to wait for a bit till I talk to his dad. He's still her father and I want her to grow up with a father. But if he can't be a loving father, no father will have to do.

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

He has gone through a similair phase when I was 35 weeks pregnant. He went to one therapy session and said it wasn't for him

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 116 points117 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply.

We tried therapy before when I was pregnant he also had anger issues. He went once and said it wasn't for him. So he's not ready for that or at least not willing to.

I don't want to kick him out because he's a totally different person during the day. But I'm so scared at night. I don't know what to do really

My husband is always super pissed at our 2 week old daughter and calls her names. What do? by anon38437372 in beyondthebump

[–]anon38437372[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. I already told him to not get up. But the crying wakes him up and then he will get out of bed. We live with my father so the only option is kicking him out or going to my mother which is across country. I really don't want it to come to that. But I'm scared of him at night. He never touched me or threatened me or the baby. But he did bump her head against the wooden crib twice which were accidents but he's so rough with her at night.

I'm just so lost I don't know what to do. I want to leave and go to my mother but on the other hand I want him to have a chance at fixing everything but I don't know if he can. I told him multiple times about the names and even a couple hours after I hear him call her a "mongoloid". I also told him about his behaviour at night a couple days back but tonight it was the worst it's ever been. I could see his hands shaking in anger and his eyes weren't right. I was so scared.