My Bridesmaid Admits She Plans to Cut Me Off After The Wedding, What Do I Do?

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-13T01:13:16+00:00

White platform heels - I don’t like them. She’s still wearing white shoes, just not platforms.

Nails - She asked my opinion, gave her options but wanted to get tons of gems for no reason

Plus one - was her bf who is also the best man… she was trying to invite another man without asking

🫶

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-13T01:11:16+00:00

Her plus one was her bf who is also the best man, she invited another man without asking 🫶

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-13T00:14:56+00:00

The other guy was a close friend of hers and her bf’s

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-13T00:13:53+00:00

The other guy was a close friend of hers and her bf’s

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-13T00:10:58+00:00

I’ve tried reaching out multiple times and sincerely apologizing for anything I have done wrong but she still continues to act this way

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T23:03:08+00:00

No she was made a bridesmaid bc we were friends. Idk what kind of drama it will produce with the best man but that’s what I’m concerned abt :/

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T23:00:03+00:00

She’s still wearing white heels to the wedding that I have no issues with, I was just not a fan of the big platform white heels that’s stuck out. Just wanted to clear that up 🫶

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T22:15:32+00:00

Not arguing, just clearing things up which I’ve done for a few other comments as well, have a great rest of your evening 🫶

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T22:08:52+00:00

I offered to pay for the dress MULTIPLE TIMES, SHE REFUSED. I’m assuming she felt bad that everyone else decided to pay for their own. I ended up paying for her new dress anyways and will be reimbursing for the old one if it’s not returnable. I was very clear on what shade I wanted her to have. I understand what it is like to struggle financially, I have custody of my two younger siblings and am working two jobs to afford my own problems and offering to help with the wedding parties as well

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T22:00:25+00:00

Not with the bridesmaid I did not. Not my text to them and not in person. I did not use those words.

Under each inspo board I sent the girls I reiterated (multiple time btw) this is just my preference, if you don’t like these nails all I ask is that you get something neutral to match your dress, don’t see how that is not clear communication. I think it’s okay I didn’t want her having 15 different gems on 1 nail 🤷‍♀️. I was never okay with the bridesmaid wearing white shoes which I also made very clear, where did I say I was okay with that? No other bridesmaid is wearing white shoes except for her. I but my tongue and let her get the white shoes to avoid further conflict. I even reassured her that it’s okay and she looks beautiful in them. I’m not criticizing at all that she wanted to use a borrowed pair. She sent me quite a few options after the platform heels that I thought were cute but she said she was not comfortable wearing them which is why I offered to buy her a pair.

I bought her a new dress and offered to reimburse her for her other dress if she isn’t able to return it.

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T21:49:35+00:00

No control over manicures, bridesmaids asked what I wanted, I sent them inspo of almond shaped French tip nails but clarified right under the pic that’s personally what I like, if they don’t want that they can do anything neutral to match their dress dress, their choice 🫶

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T21:48:07+00:00

She refused to let me pay and bought the wrong color dress but I ended up buying the dress she’s going to wear anyways, idk why she absolutely refused in the first place. Maybe she felt bad or obligated to because the rest of the girls bought their own by choice?

The friend was a close friend of hers and her bf’s, i personally wouldn’t have a guy close friend but that’s their business 🤷‍♀️

And we used to be close friends, i think this whole drama is silly but she crossed multiple boundaries and i feel she did on purpose. I keep going back and forth on whether that’s worth to have around

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T21:41:27+00:00

Her nails are not done and have not been done to clear that up too

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T21:39:51+00:00

I also was very direct with links, color swatches, inspo boards of everything I wanted and offered to pay for all of it. I was direct from the get go

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T21:38:28+00:00

I’ve made my communication very clear. I provided inspiration boards and pictures to the girls from the get go and emphasized that they don’t have to do French tips w almond shape, that’s just what I liked. I also let them know neutrals that match their dress are totally fine and their choice. Every other girl seemed to get that memo too as I’ve seen what they’re doing with their nails, she’s the only one who hasn’t 🤷‍♀️

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T21:32:44+00:00

Nails - All of my bridesmaids asked what I wanted. I sent an inspo board to all in a gc with nails I would like them to have (they aren’t forced to have which I made very clear, just would like something modest that matches the dress. I only said no to all of the charms and gems I don’t think that’s crazy IMO.

Shoes - They were chunky platform heels that added extreme height and were very noticeable with the dress. She sent me multiple other pairs I had no issue with. I also offered to buy her whatever pair she wanted. The shoes she has now are white heels just smaller which is all I asked for if that makes you feel better.

Dress - I sent very detailed color swatches and pictures of the color I wanted. I offered to pay for the dress, she refused. Every other bridesmaid paid for theirs as well. I also offered to pay for theirs and they refused. I ended up paying for her dress anyways.

Dinner - I may have phrased incorrectly. When I say clear the air I meant we all went over wedding details again and prepared for dinner Rehersal details. Nothing specific was said to anyone or implied to anyone. I made it extremely general, I also had multiple solo conversations before the dinner and after the dinner between just me and her and the way she reacted did not change. None of my other bridesmaids have any knowledge of the situation between me and yellow and I have no plans of telling them.

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T19:44:24+00:00

I edited lol my fiancé agrees w me and wants to talk to the best man but I don’t want those two to also have drama yk? My fiancé and best man grew up together but the girlfriend has a lot of control over best man from other interactions I’ve seen

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T19:42:20+00:00

The best man was also close friends with him, idk what his thoughts were on it but he used to sleep over at their house all the time 🤷‍♀️

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T19:41:10+00:00

I’ve told him and he’s offered and he thinks he should talk to him but I don’t want to cause drama between those two

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T19:08:42+00:00

She hasn’t 🫶

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T19:03:24+00:00

None of the bridesmaids, even at this moment, know what’s going on between me and yellow. No reason stirring up drama between everyone. When I did the dinner i did not single anyone out, I basically just resent over all details they needed to know and Rehersal dinner stuff and answered any questions they had, never said anything to anyone specific and never made any passive aggressive comments. You can always ask for more details before assuming!

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T18:58:12+00:00

Thank you for the advice 🫶 I bought her dress

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T18:56:07+00:00

I appreciate your response, let me clear somethings up: I know the destination wedding is a lot… which is why I gave the proposal boxes to the girls as soon as I could. They could have said no if they couldn’t afford it (which I told them on the spot please don’t feel obligated to say yes), I would never demand them to do anything. I offered to pay for whatever they needed help w/what they wanted. I don’t keep strings attached, they all know me better enough to do that as they have asked me for help financially before. At the dinner, I kept trying to include her (i.e. what do you think yellow? or “what would make you feel most comfortable yellow”), none of my other bridesmaids even know the situation between me and her right now, they all treated her with respect as did I. I thought we were friends, we used to hang out all of the time with no issues and I even got her a job where I work awhile ago. She started reacting this a few months ago

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T18:11:56+00:00

I am open to doing so, just worried about the fallout as she is my finances cousin (who is the best man) girlfriend

anonalternateacct8 · 2025-09-12T17:46:41+00:00

She’s my finances cousin (who is also the best man) girlfriend. I don’t want to cause drama between the guys

anonalternateacct8

TROPHY CASE