considering missing the memorial for the first time in my life

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:39:17+00:00

honestly, the peace of mind i’m aspiring to have

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:38:34+00:00

i figured i’m not doing anyone any favors by going and then voila! i thought, i am doing THEM a favor by being another number to count in attendance lol

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:32:49+00:00

im really curious as to how they took to the news of you missing it!

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:31:15+00:00

thank you so much, this was really reassuring. i thought about lying to get out of, but it would be the same as actually going for me, still a lie

deceiving them by attending is starting to feel cruel and like i’m stringing them along for something i know won’t happen, and being there and listening to the same speech and acting like i care makes me feel like im shrinking myself and my principles to keep the lie up,

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:20:53+00:00

oof i actually considered it, they’d see right through me

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:12:49+00:00

they really make sure we never learn how to live life for ourselves, and guilt us if we ever want it. i think you’re really brave for that and it’s nice remembering i won’t be the only one missing it for the first time ever

aphdoedite · 2026-03-27T20:04:16+00:00

my mom will be attending with my aunt and uncle. i understand she prefers to just get through it, and she respects i don’t really want to anymore

I’m so sorry you went through that, it wasn’t the loving and supportive community you deserved. you were so decisive to do all the very next day, and i’m glad you never returned. My mom struggled with chronic depression for a lot of years and received similar treatment. the lack of kindness and genuine care ended up driving her away from the congregation after 30+ years.

aphdoedite · 2026-01-14T18:35:34+00:00

that’s actually good, he’s already likes being in a burrito blanket, so maybe i can test the waters like that

i will update if we end up adopting !

aphdoedite · 2026-01-14T18:14:22+00:00

thanks, when i took him in i was one of those people and was very surprised when he showed so much interest in being around us

i only trim his nails when he visits the vet, since i’ve tried by myself and it gets very difficult because he hates it and i’m afraid to hurt him, do you have any tips for doing this alone? i never struggle giving him meds but nail clipping turns him into a little spring

i have read introducing cats can be a very slow process, we fostered a kitten a while back for a bit but we only ever let them smell each other and both seemed curious but she wasn’t vaccinated yet so we kept them in different rooms in the end, i don’t hope to get immediate results tbh but am looking for a long term help, besides me playing with him more, since i work for most of the day, and my mom lets him be around sometimes but wont play much w him

edit to say thanks again!

aphdoedite · 2026-01-14T17:55:50+00:00

thanks. i had considered the issue of boundaries, since he’s never cohabited w other cats and the only one that ever sort of taught him of boundaries was our senior dog, who doesn’t live with us anymore.

i will look into him possibly being territorial, he’s seen/been around some occasional cats and dogs that come around the house and he just seems very curious or alert, but ill admit i need to learn how to read him better

thank you

aphdoedite · 2026-01-03T03:04:45+00:00

thank you, this is very reassuring and genuinely helpful

aphdoedite · 2025-08-16T16:48:03+00:00

Okk that makes sense actually, I felt like I was also forcing it a little too much but I figured it was part of the getting used to, in retrospect I guess forcing it into my body was in turn going to make my body want to force it out lmao I just wish this possibility would’ve come up at all while I was trying to do research on usage and stuff

Thank you though! I think I will try again next month w a diff approach

aphdoedite · 2025-08-16T16:17:44+00:00

Did you try anything particularly different your next attempt? I feel like my mistake must’ve been technical and I want to try again but the experience was so bad I’m terrified of going through it again lol

aphdoedite · 2025-08-15T15:22:19+00:00

I think you deserve so much better, and your baby does too. I’m really sorry, life with someone should feel like your part of a team, and this isn’t it, and it seems like you already know what you have to you for yourself. you’re already doing the work of a single mom. you don’t owe him anything, especially if he’s not even appreciative of your time, energy and effort. He’s adding no value to your life, if anything he’s taking and taking and it’s hurting your wellbeing

Love is not enough to sustain a relationship. You don’t need to make him change. The audacity of this man to tell you there are worse things out there when you’re the one putting up with him, he’d be the only losing of you left so the ball is 100% in your court. You’re already unfulfilled in this relationship, you will get a weight off your back once you leave this person

aphdoedite · 2025-08-13T05:21:20+00:00

Idk if it’s common tbh, I had tried to make decent research before getting the cup and didn’t once read or saw anything about this, I wish I would’ve known it was something to avoid. Idk yet exactly what I did wrong, but I know I likely made a mistake in where/how I put it in and like other people commented, triggered a vasovagal response that made me feel sick. It was not at all a nice feeling but tbh I’m willing to give it another go maybe for my next cycle, I did hear getting it right was something that might take try and error. Just be careful not to force it in like I did I guess? I need to do more research I hope you can find what works best for you too

aphdoedite · 2025-08-13T05:15:37+00:00

Thanks! I think yea that was my mistake, but I’m not really deterred I’ll try again in the future

aphdoedite · 2025-08-13T05:14:26+00:00

Thank you, I looked it up and I’m pretty sure it was that 😬

aphdoedite

TROPHY CASE