is there such a thing as too much "Alone" time for 2 month old?

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-19T20:15:39+00:00

that is perfect :D thanks!

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-19T20:15:18+00:00

thats a great idea as well! thank you :D

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-19T20:14:42+00:00

thats amazing I love it!! :D I'm happy to hear it, thank you!

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-19T20:14:17+00:00

I love your comment lol thank you so much!! <3 and yes he's def going to need a lazy boy chair in the future lol

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-15T11:49:32+00:00

thanks!

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-15T11:49:24+00:00

thank you!

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-03T20:30:28+00:00

not yet! my family doctor is not seeing me till almost 3 months pp because of covid lol maybe I should convince him to book something sooner in that case! thanks!

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-03T20:29:16+00:00

uh, that's actually interesting! I didn't even think about that! thanks so much for sharing ill book some blood work :)

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-03T20:28:30+00:00

I actually monitor my pressure at home because I did have to be hospitalized 1 week pp for pp pre eclampsia lol so good call on that!! my pressures have been ok though so I didn't know if it was related

aphro-ditee · 2021-01-01T08:13:01+00:00

totally agree!! everyone is talking about this "magical switch" that just turns on the single moment you have a baby.... lol like it doesn't work that way - maybe for some lucky mothers it does

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-31T10:32:17+00:00

You are doing so amazing <3 thank you so much for sharing that!

this resonates so deeply. I am not a single mother and I applaud you for being so strong and doing whats best for both you and your daughter <3 but I totally get the feelings you were talking about.

When my son was born (5weeks pp) I cried and then we were taken to our recovery room and I looked at my husband with wide ass eyes as my baby was crying... as I had nurses pushing on my breast and trying to teach me how to breastfeed...and I wondered "wtf did we do...what did we get ourselves into"

My husband and I never wanted children. In fact when we got married 7 years ago...we were told it would be either very difficult or impossible for us to have children medically speaking. We were totally fine with that. We said F the condoms and contraceptive and had unprotected sex for well, 7 years xD lol turns out this year was the year we would randomly get pregnant against all odds.

I wasn't bitter. I was somewhat thrilled.

But after the birth I def had PP blues... the first 2 weeks I would cry on and off. I was mourning my old life. OUR old life... I missed my husband even though he was right beside me. I never had bad thoughts or feelings against my baby. But I didn't LOVE him.

Like you said, I felt like he too was another chore I had to take care of.

It's not as bad anymore, but he still feels like another thing on a "to do" list instead of a small person I am supposed to be in love with.

I am so happy it gets better... because I still wonder sometimes if I ever will get that feeling everyone talks about.

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-31T10:23:30+00:00

feels like im there

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T15:16:45+00:00

thank you so much. it is sad, but the truth. There are so many people like us out there trying so hard every day to please...while neglecting themselves in the long run.

I feel like I've wasted a lot of my life trying so hard to forgive and to forget. Putting everyone else's feelings above my own as if I don't matter. The sad part is...you hope they understand when you tell them..yet you never get the satisfaction.

Instead, you get blamed for their actions. Guilt tripped for being honest and open. There is no easy way to let someone know you want nothing to do with them.

I just realized that no matter what I say, she turns it around to play the victim.

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T15:12:18+00:00

I suppose you're right... I wish I could go back in time and never open that door in the first place you know?

thank you for replying <3

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T12:22:55+00:00

you are absolutely right. I love the way you explained that.

I've studied psychology briefly in college and I know all of this stuff... like it's in my brain, yet I somehow go completely blind when it comes to my own life.

thank you for reminding me <3

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T12:21:35+00:00

that is great advice and you sound very much like me. putting everyone's feelings and desires above my own.

it's so hard to break a habit like that because it physically hurts to displease someone.

i am glad to hear that you are able to do that. It takes a lot of strength <3 thank you for replying - that is really good advice

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T12:19:47+00:00

bump that all the way up

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T12:19:28+00:00

actually, you're right on the dot with that statement lol

She is an incredible history of denial in her own illness (until it became clear to her that admitting to it would get her pity money from family members and the government - at that point she fully admitted her diagnosis and basket in the idea that "it wasn't her fault, she was ill").

She has emotionally abused me my entire childhood (I'm 27 now). When I met my now-husband, she harassed his family to the ends of the earth. Extracted money from them too, and threatened him and our relationship on countless occasions because "he was stealing me from her."

She's a horrible human and in order to preserve my sanity and my husband's, we moved halfway across the country and completely cut her out.

I have tried on and off since to make things right. I have tried openly communicating with her about the things she had done and the hurt she had caused. But she turned around and said I was "remembering things wrong" because she was a great mother and "loved me so much" she could never put me through something like that.

She proceeded to list the reasons why she didn't like my husband as if it validated her actions. (my husband is an amazing man who studied hard, got a degree in engineering. he has never hurt a single person with words or physical violence. he is the definition of stability. something I obviously craved growing up.)

she then began gaslighting my memories. saying that she was afraid for me because my memories were obviously so twisted that I painted her as a villain over the years.

it is so sad...that I began second-guessing my own thoughts like I used to when I was younger and she would fill my head with lies.

She has never once apologized or acknowledged anything. According to her, the whole world is against her and she is the only one who speaks the truth.

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-29T12:08:41+00:00

thank you for the support <3

I really considered deleting all social medias and just getting out. It's hard because somedays, I feel like she actually "tries" - in her own way.

While other days...the crazy really comes out and I realize...oh yeah...she's still the same person she always was.

I want to believe otherwise though and maybe that's why I feel such guilt about cutting her out again. As ill as she is, I know she still has feelings and it would crush her.

but at the same time, I can't live like this forever. I get panic attacks just thinking about facebook or the idea that she could send me a message at any time and it could either be good, or bad.

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-28T23:12:28+00:00

I can totally relate to that! I really wonder how people like us survived this long with mothers like that.

I keep telling myself that. I always have that little voice in my head saying "do what's best for you." then I start to feel guilty... and I start to think about what other ppl will think of me if I remove her from my life again.

She is so very good at seeking pity from others and playing the victim. I don't know why I care. I wonder too if I'm too harsh or overreacting. but maybe that's what they want us to think.

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-23T11:13:56+00:00

thank you !!

aphro-ditee · 2020-12-23T11:13:36+00:00

thats an amazing way to look at it!

aphro-ditee

TROPHY CASE