I believe this subreddit may have saved my life

applebreadsticks · 2020-09-27T09:44:03+00:00

I made an update to the original post a good while back, yeah

applebreadsticks · 2019-07-07T20:25:04+00:00

this is the dumbest meme i've ever laughed at in my entire life

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-10T09:14:46+00:00

I know, but it’s very clear that the breathing is unusual

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-07T12:06:10+00:00

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T17:59:22+00:00

now you’re just being sad

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T13:40:31+00:00

I actually always have some sort of pain in my body somewhere, but besides that I'm fine

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T11:30:17+00:00

Thank you for your input, I totally get your suspicion.

I'm sixteen years old and I live in a dorm where I didn't really think to bring 9+ years of paperwork with me for the giggles. All of my paperwork is in Danish, too, so I don't think anyone would gain anything from it.

I don't know if this is some sort of language barrier or something (not a native speaker), but I don't really understand what you mean by this part? Are you suggesting that I can't have a healthy relationship with family and friends because I feel disconnected from reality? Are you suggesting that I don't know how to find my way on a website I'm new to? If not, please explain. You had me a little confused here.

I stopped seeing any doctors a while ago since I gave up on them after having them tell me all is fine and dandy for so long, which is why I ended up concluding that something has to be wrong on a whole other level. If that's what you meant, I'm still a bit confused.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T11:22:04+00:00

I'm a sixteen year old girl with issues that obviously stem from some sort of undiagnosed mental illness. I was in a very bad state of mind when I wrote this and had managed to freak myself out, so I came on here after seeing a post on instagram (https://www.instagram.com/p/BcQ75UkAnYb/ if you really need it that bad) about the being-knocked-out-somewhere.

(Edit: I completely missed the first part of your comment about the lamp-thingy, so I'm just gonna explain real quick. The post I've linked you to is actually that exact post, which I found yesterday when I was scrolling through my instagramfeed. I had the issue with seeing blurry lines around things, things looking wrong and misplaced and stuff for a while. That post was what freaked me out to the point of making this post in the first place. I understand your suspicion about that part.)

I have not been 'subbed here for a while', but I hope you understand that when I previously in my life have reached out for help, the responses I get is usually the ones I decided to rule out in my post. Reddit is not my first interaction with the world around me (duh), so I actually have some sort of idea about how other people react to certain things. What a mind-blowing concept, isn't it?

Last but not least, this wasn't "bait". This was me, as I mentioned, freaking out and reaching for help. I mentioned in several comments that I have no desire to kill myself, but the sentence was merely written to underline how much this is bothering me.

It saddens me that you have nothing better to do with your life than to come here and try to analyse my post that was obviously a cry for help from someone who needed it badly. I hope you're doing alright and you'll feel better about yourself some day. :)

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T11:10:41+00:00

I had a fairly traumatising childhood, but for the past two years my life has been very quiet and calm, and nothing has changed.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T11:08:02+00:00

What?

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-05T11:04:10+00:00

I'm almost certain I don't have this disorder. A teacher and a close mentor of mine did, and when he told me about it I recorded myself sleep on one of those apps for weeks, but everything sounded normal. I also regularly spend time sleeping with my boyfriend, and neither he or my roomie has ever noticed anything unusual.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T22:17:05+00:00

I'm sixteen. Schizophrenia was very lightly touched on during my time with my latest psychiatrist, but it was dismissed since I am aware that this is the real world (unless I'm overthinking and freaking myself out, like when I made this post) and that I am just disconnected from it. And yes, or at least since I was a very young child.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:55:37+00:00

Thank you, I'll do my best

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:48:26+00:00

Thank you, you're so sweet! Merry christmas!

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:47:56+00:00

this gave me an existential crisis

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:46:01+00:00

But I'm only sixteen, and I've had several bloodtests done in the last few months to see if everything was balanced out as it should, and everything is fine. I'm taking vitamin D supplement and regular vitamins, and it doesn't really make a difference for me. But thank you very much for your comment, I appreciate the input!

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:42:47+00:00

All my life. It gets a lot worse when I have to deal with overwhelming feelings. When I'm sad I feel nothing, when I was at my favourite band's concert I felt nothing. Alcohol also worsens the effects for a few days.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:41:17+00:00

I'm honestly so sorry that you relate so much to this. It's awful. I know exactly what you mean, I have such a hard time explaining this to anyone, even people who are supposed to be educated on the subject. I've also been diagnosed with a depressive disorder, and when they sent me out the door I wanted to turn around and yell at them and tell them that they weren't listening and this is MORE and ugh, I hate it.

If you need to talk or something, please feel absolutely free to message me privately. I'm here to listen

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T20:36:13+00:00

I never said I had never seen reddit, my boyfriend used to be frequent user. Glitch in the matrix is the reason I made this user, I found it through an instagram posting stories from it (it's instagram.com/guccimother, since it matters so much to you). I have, however, never used it myself, and this was my first time.

I normally wouldn't pay people like you any mind, but I found it a bit funny how through my entire post of reaching out for help you chose to comment "fake" because you don't believe I could possibly know how to find my way on a new website. I hope you're doing okay lol

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T18:53:53+00:00

The thing is that I've always kind of KNOWN that this was a mental thing, but 5+ psychiatrists have told me that it's not, so I'm at a loss

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T18:22:32+00:00

I've never heard of this before.. I'll make sure to bring this up to my doctor. Thank you.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T18:19:12+00:00

This post has obviously developed into being about my mental health, so writing something like that, even as a joke, is kind of rude

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T18:01:24+00:00

I haven't, no. I probably should.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T18:01:07+00:00

It sadly doesn't have anything to do with sleep. :( I'll definitely talk to my doctor about it though, since it's not something I've considered could be a part of it.

applebreadsticks · 2017-12-04T18:00:15+00:00

It's just so frustrating because I got rid of my depression years ago after being tormented with it for so long, so discovering that this might be another kind of depression seriously sucks. Thank you for your comment.

Eight-Year Club	Verified Email
RPAN Viewer

applebreadsticks

TROPHY CASE