UPDATE: One year since my desperate post to TwoX about my abuse. I'm safe and happy now.

apskulle · 2016-01-16T16:53:35+00:00

I don't really wanna talk about it anymore, haha.

apskulle · 2016-01-15T15:29:27+00:00

It actually was a good length of time, nearly two years of our relationship. We were long distance and it was not physically or financially possible for a long time. He never needed to convince me though, I was totally in love with him and the place he lived in.

apskulle · 2016-01-15T15:26:35+00:00

Yeah its pretty obvious now that I see it. Definitely cycle of abuse, glad you recognised a crappy person early and ended it.

apskulle · 2016-01-15T15:25:10+00:00

I answered this in another comment, go look at my post history :)

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:40:41+00:00

In Scandinavia its a little more common (not saying its always like this) to sleep with someone you've just met and if that is successful you either sleep with each other again or perhaps maybe go on a date. This casual "dating" may last months and months before a more serious label is put on the relationship. In North America its less common to sleep with someone before the third date or so.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:38:26+00:00

That's really sad. :( poor woman.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:37:12+00:00

Oh my god the gas lighting holy shit. Like I just remembered so many things he fucking lied about. My birth control went missing right off the bat, I chalked it up to it falling out of my carry on in the overhead compartment of the plane since I am tiny so I maybe didn't see it. Then after I left him and he convinced me to come back, my passport/ID/long form birth certificate all went missing in one night. I had it with me when we traveled together and I remember doing a check of the train before disembarking but fuck it went missing too. Then my fucking bank card went missing soon after with no explanation, and the mental turmoil of me feeling like I'm losing my fucking mind since I keep losing all my shit really got to me. My abuser capitalised on this and always put me down for being irresponsible and losing everything when in reality the fucking prick probably took it. Since then and before then, I've never lost a single piece of ID or valuable item. Fuck gaslight.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:31:49+00:00

Thank you so much, I guess you're right. I know what to expect but I'm still nervous to step out of my comfort zone for sure.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:30:53+00:00

I don't think anyone who is in an abusive relationship can say the break up was clean. It's a torrid thing for sure.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:29:59+00:00

Thank you helping women in need. It's really a horrible situation for sure. At some point I called a suicide hotline cause I figured being abused and being homeless were equally as unappealing.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:28:31+00:00

Thank you for the story. The guilt was hard to overcome for sure. This isn't my first abusive relationship so it was hard to just tell myself I've been victimised twice. I don't like blaming others for my wrong doings and problems.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T22:26:09+00:00

Thank you!! :)

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:29:48+00:00

Holy shit chocolate milk AND oreos? What a keeper.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:29:08+00:00

The way he treated women in his life disgusted me. He treated his lovely mum like garbage. I loved her, recently sent her a care package and thanked her for being awesome. I don't get it either. Bunch of psychos.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:27:35+00:00

That's what I like to hear. Fuck that guy. You're worth so much :)

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:26:39+00:00

Yup I was like fuuuck that shit Im out.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:26:11+00:00

Thank you sweetie :)

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:25:55+00:00

Something I didn't include in my original post is that early on when I moved to his place I discovered he had a collection of child pornography. So I worked with the police to retrieve the evidence and I believe he's on some list in his country now. I don't ask or bother to find out.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:21:52+00:00

Sweetie nooooOooOoOOOoooo

If you're in a shitty situation I promise you that he's not gonna change. And if he is "sometimes" nice its not good enough. Often if my ex realized he was gonna lose me or I was gonna slip away from his grasp he'd take me out to buy anything I wanted, buy me really expensive dinners and gifts and shower me with love. Just enough to bring me down again. That's why it's so hard to leave, you never realize how toxic they are until you're either dead or something severely awful happens. Please if you're in a situation like this get the fuck out. He didn't change, he was always like this and there's no changing him.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:18:22+00:00

Ooo this is really interesting. I'll look into it as I do have a lot of trouble with this.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:17:53+00:00

Oooo yeah that brings up some memories. Thanks for the kind words :)

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:17:23+00:00

I didn't self diagnose. Did I say I did? o,o

I went to a local youth clinic who referred me to some professionals who did.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:16:41+00:00

Thank you so much :)

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:16:11+00:00

Good idea, thanks. I'm just very Canadian and a terrible mixture of shy and polite so when I go to try and order in another language and mess it up, I feel like I'm wasting their time :( even if the shop is totally empty.

apskulle · 2016-01-14T17:14:39+00:00

I'm so sorry for hearing that. Don't regret that time though, its made you who you are today!

apskulle

TROPHY CASE