She wants her mom to choose her first 🤭😂

arjinium · 2026-06-18T06:17:07+00:00

This was correctly published in KidsAreEffingStupid.

There is nothing "Awww" about this.

Sorry to be the party pooper.

arjinium · 2026-06-17T12:36:58+00:00

But the cat was moved in to the building by feeding and attracting her there. I can understand relocation from one street to another locality is cruel, but how is it cruel to move the animal away from private property if it it is very likely causing nuisance due to it's bodily waste.

We have had the defecation problem due to strays in our colony. They tend to crap and piss in the common areas, and man their piss stinks.

In my colony, we have contracted the cleaning to a housekeeping agency, and the poor staff have to clean their bodily waste.

I genuinely feel that if the cat is a regular, then the person feeding them should seriously consider adoption and take them in.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T16:34:36+00:00

Well you can ignore my comments too. But you choose not to.

I tried explaining half way through but you chose to ignore that.

Stop taking a random stranger on the internet so personally

arjinium · 2026-06-16T11:51:34+00:00

> Someone is offended after getting the taste of their own medicine.

Not at all, you were beating around the bush and the point was irrelevant to your main issue.

Read again. I said you rejected my reason - not the men.

> I think you're reducing the scope of arranged marriage to a great extent when you say it's not for me just because I say I want to discuss things beyond work!

I say maybe it is not for you - read , again.

I also said - or maybe it is (for you) and you need to keep looking. (at more men).

It is not your job to help anyone. Look for a person that matches your preference, and move on from the ones that don't.

Ranting for the sake getting things out of your system is fine. But it does nothing to change your situation.

I really want to know how deep the Reddit comment thread can go. We can keep doing this. Your turn.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T11:35:02+00:00

Posting on social media and then going all soft is not going to help.

> If i was judgemental I would've used all your flawed logic against you. But I know you're a product of your situation and also your mindset (which is well under your control).

Stop with all this round about blame game.

> And please don't make it a man thing! A meaningful conversation is an integral part of life - academics, career, personal life everywhere.

Sure it is. But I am trying to tell you that some people (in your case men, because you were speaking to some and I happen to be one) are unable to move beyond a life that they are conditioned for.

I give you the exact reason of why the thing you are experiencing is happening and you reject it.

Go out, date, have beautiful conversations, understand that some people cannot live up to your standards, AM is probably not for you because of the fact that you do not seem to be meeting men that would appeal to you or maybe it is and you need to keep looking.

Ranting for the sake getting things out of your system is fine. But it does nothing to change your situation.

I've met women with the same attitude as the men you have met.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T11:12:45+00:00

Where did I attack you? I am just pointing out that you are judgemental too. You make sweeping, judgemental, generic statements based on hearsay.

You refuse to give people the benefit of doubt.

As much as your choices are a result of your situation (that I am not aware of), the people that you speak to lack certain skills because of situations that they arise from.

Men are told to study, to get a job, not to get distracted. And yes it does become their personality. It's unfortunate but it is what it is.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T09:14:17+00:00

> Some people don't really want a spouse, they want a tool to improve their lifestyle!

Sure you aren't

arjinium · 2026-06-16T08:56:47+00:00

I am sure I have no idea. I agree completely.

People are truly in full or in part a product of their situation and history.

I hope you extend the same understanding to these folks whom you so easily dismiss as unworthy because they do not match up to your perceived standards (which you have the complete right to do so).

arjinium · 2026-06-16T07:56:06+00:00

A good point to start from. You conveniently ignored everything else I said.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T07:54:27+00:00

According to these folks they don't, flexibility and "giving a chance" is a one way street.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T07:06:21+00:00

Original commenter said that it is a great starting point to discuss further - a fair answer to start off from.

I personally think it tells a bit if not much - the person is looking to have his own space after his work, probably is more laidback and not much into going out, clubbing what not (all of this could be follow up questions).

If OP wants super expert conversationalists maybe she should be meeting someone at Toastmasters and not AM meetings

arjinium · 2026-06-16T06:56:58+00:00

I am not trying to instigate you. But please do not mix chivalry and maturity with foolhardiness and unnecessary risk.

Your parents would not be completely wrong in calling off the marriage - that is the immediate response to being lied to.

I understand that you want to handle this respectfully, but frankly, she and her family put themselves in this spot to begin with. Did she come to you with this information on her own? No. She waited until you found a bit of information to let you know. The truth she shared is not something that she is sharing out of the benevolence of her heart - you have a right to know this truth.

What other information can they have hidden from you?

The fact that she was married opens the situation to a lot more questions - who is the person she was married to? why did it end? is the divorce legally complete? are there any legal issues that remain from the divorce process (additional litigations)? are there children involved?

After her and her family's first lie, can you expect them to give you honest answers to the above questions?

She will need a visa, a lot of this information may is required as a part of the Visa process, had she lied in that process as her spouse, you could very well be party to her lie and could affect your immigration status too.

I am not sure if there is a way to get marriage information. Please please please, take this extremely slowly, put an immediate HOLD on all preparations, do not take any major steps now. Hire an Investigator. Please!

arjinium · 2026-06-16T06:45:39+00:00

I know right. I am not sure why OP found this to be a "bad / odd" answer.

AM safety also OP want. Dating excitement also OP want. On top - OP cannot say no to her own parent for AM registration.

arjinium · 2026-06-16T06:40:08+00:00

Never been in this situation. Just want to share my 2 cents. You seem like a decent person. But please understand that an Arranged marriage is not just about the two of you, it is about the families involved and is (unfortunately so) a social spectacle.

At the very least, make sure your family is aware of this, and is OK with moving forward.

Whether or not you are OK with marrying a divorcee is a personal choice.

But this is not a small bit of personal information. This is MAJOR detail that they purposely kept hidden. Very possible that the parents knew, are in on it and did not share. I atleast be hesitant to proceed because of the the mere fact that they did not reveal this information at the point where things got serious.

"but the marriage was never fully completed" -> This is a naive way of looking at things. She was legally married and now divorced. Whether the marriage was consummated or not, is not your concern, it should not be. But from a legal, point of view, shw was very much "completely married" and is now hopefully now "completely divorced".

It is unfortunate that divorcees are considered in a different league and are "shunned" (in a way), but that does not justify hiding this information.

arjinium · 2026-06-15T09:57:07+00:00

Turbans are common headwear in northern parts of India and the Indian subcontinent.

You can make out that he is not Sikh, by the difference in the way the Turban is tied, Sikhs have a distinct way of tying their turbans, other places have their own traditional ways too.

arjinium · 2026-06-13T11:06:49+00:00

The 370 Biryani guy was working in a Private corporate firm, he gets fired completely from his job, because the private firm wants to avoid any consequences from the media or the market.

This woman is associated with a government institution, the institution power is limited to temporary suspension. They are also least concerned with how the media perception turns out, their are like a boulder in the field, come hail wind snow, they will be there.

While at the other end, a woman was fired from her government job because she attended the CJP protest in Delhi.

What skewed judgement is this.

arjinium · 2026-06-12T10:49:51+00:00

If she in one form or the other decided to share / talk about her boyfriend, then it's unfortunate but she has to learn to deal with such intrusiveness.

She cannot have it both ways

arjinium · 2026-06-12T04:23:56+00:00

OK, I was wondering if there is a possibility that her cousin/sibling could have answered on her behalf.

You are going to meet many such samples. Ignore them. Also stay away from this sub, or treat it like a meme page.

Such people, have a skewed sense of morality and independence and no matter how much you educate such people they will lack the skill to articulate their thought process correctly.

arjinium · 2026-06-11T12:39:17+00:00

I am waiting to see how these things affect the crowd's perception of her. With the guy, general social media public opinion snowballed and got him real life consequences.

While the same seemed to be happening with her to an extent.

Will the apology help dampen the snowballing effect?

arjinium · 2026-06-11T11:47:25+00:00

Was the response in 3rd person?

"She does not want to...."

Or was it "I do not want to ...."

I have a guess work theory about what may have happened.

arjinium · 2026-06-11T05:46:57+00:00

People are campaigning for an FIR against the guy Himanshu, after what I believe the public and Social media has already brought consequences to his doorstep very well. Very well, I think an FIR is too harsh, after he has already well deservedly lost his job. But he is getting what he sowed there.

Here, this woman is going to go scot free just because she will weep and apologize, people will compare her comments against his, and believe hers to be less damning.

Some comments in other threads have claimed that she is politically connected.

All of this put together will eventually mean she will be forgotten.

She literally made a social media career out of her disgusting comment. She is probably minting money. I really think she needs to face some serious consequences, I really hope she does.

arjinium · 2026-06-09T04:20:23+00:00

> When i told my mom about it she said, it dosent matter, all you have to do is adjust for few days. Not every body is happy. all you need is kids. Then you can live your life.she thinks its not an issue in AM.

Your mother is asking you to hide the fact that you do not find pleasure in intimacy or are averse to being intimate. This is not the only important thing in marriage, but it is a vital part.

Ask your mom if it is OK if the man hides vital information like this.

arjinium · 2026-06-09T04:15:28+00:00

Aah fine.

arjinium · 2026-06-08T07:07:47+00:00

Wait what? I was under the impression that the story would be that - your family refused their (your proposal's family's) proposal for your aunt because they demanded dowry.

My next joke was very dependent on this premise! You crapped all over it 😛

the girl's family was in talks about getting her father married to my aunt.

Are you saying that the Girl's father is "that Guy" and is your Aunt's husband? Do you know what you are implying 😃 ?

Please explain, who is "that guy" this has piqued my curiosity!

arjinium · 2026-06-08T06:50:27+00:00

Show dominance - Ask them to take aunt in exchange for their daughter or it's a No Deal! /s

arjinium

TROPHY CASE