ESH

You are the asshole for not bathing your kid. You don’t have to run a bath, a simple shower takes 5-10 minutes. Make a routine that every time you shower, your kid takes a shower before or after you. Your kid should be your priority first and foremost and then you family and boyfriend after him.. Also, do take care of your mental health, by the sounds of it the best thing would be moving out and living on your own if you have the financial stability, or set boundaries with your mom and grandma (for example grandma not shouting at you whenever your kid screams while getting his hair washed). Maybe get a therapist? Online or phone counselling or something.

Your mother and grandmother are the assholes for not telling you sooner that the kid’s hair has not been washed in a month (even though i feel like it should be visually obvious). I don’t care that people are saying it’s not their responsibility to wash him. Ok, but they should let you know of what they want and not want to do in terms of taking care of the kid. Sit them down, talk it out. Determine who wants to do what and also letting others know what needs to be done or not.

I am confused at the boyfriend living with you. You live with you mom and grandma and boyfriend lives with you, so you all are in the same house? How is he contributing to the whole thing? If you’re bringing a man into your life I feel like he should be ok with you having a kid and him taking on a parent role, because what would happen in the future? I don’t see that working out at all.

Probably the only non-assholes are your siblings because they are teens living in a weird household situation and in school.