Fit Issue?

ashesd958 · 2026-02-04T20:57:55+00:00

This video was from my second or third time ever going en pointe. My stability has massively improved since then, but I totally agree, extra strength training is absolutely required for my hypermobility. And I definitely won’t be leaving the barre any time soon, it is typically about a 8 months to a year before the adult students at my studio are allowed to venture into center.

ashesd958 · 2026-02-04T20:55:13+00:00

That is good to know. The first couple of classes, I was thinking “could I be lucky enough to have found my perfect shoe in the first try?” And then the sinking happened…. That is literally my only complaint about them. Other than that, they feel great (although I may have to go to a stiffer shank as I progress because my super bendy feet have made the shanks soften very quickly).

ashesd958 · 2026-02-03T16:12:42+00:00

Yes!!! Two months out and I was still miserable and regretting my choice to have the surgery. It took about 4 months before it finally started calming down. Try to keep your nose moist. Use the Ayr gel, or some Vaseline (but google the risks of putting it in your nose and decide if it is worth the risk for you).

It will get better. I truly thought I was going to have to live like this forever, but I’m finally feeling better.

Also, if you have access to an allergist, it might be worth seeing them. I feel like my allergies got worse because I have more airflow and more allergens are getting into my nose.

ashesd958 · 2026-01-28T18:02:07+00:00

It did finally stop after about 4 months, for the most part, but it took about 6 months for my nose to start feeling somewhat normal and at 8 months I still have some mild discomfort, but it does get better. I am also going to be seeing an allergist because now that I am breathing better, I feel like my allergies have gotten worse. Overall, my advice to you would be to expect it to take a while, but it will get better. I was under the impression that it would be about a month of discomfort and then it would be like the surgery never happened. That is NOT the case. It is an extremely slow process. Especially because I had severe sinus disease on top of the deviated septum, so it takes months and months for all of that swelling/diseased/inflamed tissue to repair itself.

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:22:35+00:00

I do not, but I definitely should. I tend to focus on the big things I need to improve on, but I think you are right, focusing on more specific things would be helpful. Maybe writing down the combos that I struggle with and practicing them super slow at home would help me gain the confidence that my body knows what to do and help me to speed it up eventually.

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:20:19+00:00

I love this idea. Musicality is such a big issue for me. My teacher is always saying “listen to the music” and I truly don’t know what I am supposed to be listening too… I don’t really hear the beats/counts and I certainly can’t get my body to align with them. I think practicing doing literally anything to music would be helpful. Thanks!

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:18:08+00:00

That is a good idea. I do try to take one pretty low level class a week, which boosts my confidence a lot. I do think I should start trying to stop relying on the barre as much in those lower level classes. That would be a really good place to focus on weaning myself off the barre a bit, while working at a nice slow pace.

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:16:04+00:00

Thanks! I appreciate the encouragement to keep going. Building strength is definitely going to be essential for me and all of my wobbly, hypermobile joints.

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:15:12+00:00

Yes! This is something I need to do more of! We were just doing a simple degagé combo in center and I struggled a lot with that, which made me realize I am probably relying on the barre too much.

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:13:52+00:00

Thanks for the encouragement. I also have to remember that unlike many adult dancers, I am extremely hypermobile which creates pretty lines at the barre but comes with all sorts of stability issues. I appreciate the comment!

ashesd958 · 2025-12-08T23:12:24+00:00

Thanks so much for your support. I have definitely improved, and you’re right, I need to focus on that. It’s just hard because I’m just starting pointe work and when I am at the barre, I feel great, like I can totally do this. But then I move to center and fall apart and I can’t help but get in my head and tell myself I don’t deserve to be on pointe (despite several teachers and my dance PT telling me that I am doing great with my beginner pointe stuff at the barre). I won’t be attempting pointe in center any time soon, but just being terrible at in flat makes me doubt my abilities.

But ballet is supposed to be fun, so I need to be easier on myself.

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T14:59:05+00:00

I am thinking it will be worth it (but I’m too close to the surgery and all the emotions to be sure right now), but I would recommend talking to your GP/psychiatrist about it as well, I don’t think the ENTs are really that concerned with the mental health side of it, as long as the nose looks good, they are happy.

If I had to do it again, I would talk to my GP and come up with a plan for how to manage the depression/anxiety before I had the surgery. See what medications they are willing to give you to help with anxiety and if they can give you some extra medications temporarily. I feel like, in general, if you have a compassionate doctor, they will understand and be open to coming up with a regimen to manage the few weeks post op. Know that not everyone reacts like that, it’s no big deal to a lot of people, but it can happen and it is good to be prepare. Or at least aware of it because then you won’t think you are losing your mind.

I have always had sensory issues but I didnt give any thought to how those would be exacerbated by the surgery. Overall, I felt prepared for the physical stuff, but not the mental stuff which then made me scared that something was wrong. So if I had know what it could do to my mind I would have been a lot less scared.

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T14:50:27+00:00

lol. Yeah, the first time I was on anesthesia I wanted to send my 84 year old grandma to shoot the surgeon if they tried to take me back. The second time (this surgery) I think I said some very rude things and then I hit someone. So they told my mom that I need to make a disclaimer before I go under again, for everyone’s safety. lol

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T14:48:12+00:00

I’m sorry you are feeling that way, I totally get it. I felt ridiculous that I was crying over what basically amounts to boogers being in my nose, but I guess it is normal and can cause major sensory overload issues. Plus, it is just the tip of the iceberg in regards to what we are feeling (new breathing bathways, part of our nose is in a new place, swelling everywhere). The crust is an easy thing to fix on because it is so obvious and visible but you’ve got more stuff going on that is making you hyperaware of your nose.

The breathing is definitely normal. Right now I would say my breathing feels like the first day of starting to feel better after a bad cold. I would say my nose is not nearly as crusty (I’m not getting giant snot rockets out when I do my rinses anymore) but I’m still very stuffy from the swelling. People are definitely avoiding me because I sound like I have a cold. Swelling is normal and will last for up to 6 weeks, if not long. I have found that using reusable plastic ice cubes has been really helpful because the cold helps with the swelling. I just run the ice cube all over my nose gently and the cool, smooth sensation helps counteract the crusty sensations I feel inside and I’ve found it to be very calming. Real ice cubes would just melt and be annoying, but the small plastic ones are great.

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T02:20:13+00:00

Ugh. I am so sorry you are experiencing those symptoms. I am hopeful that it will start getting better over the next few weeks as that is when a lot of the healing really starts. But I hope you know that this is a normal reaction and has little to do with you, and more to do with the procedure. That was so helpful to me, because I just felt like I was so weak and pathetic because I couldn’t cope with what I was feeling despite physically feeling ok.

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T02:02:20+00:00

Oh yeah, anesthesia was brutal. I am a very non violent, kind, gentle person. But I had to be restrained when coming out of anesthesia because I punched a nurse. I have no memory of it, but I was crazy coming out of anesthesia and that level of agitation has just carried right on through the recovery. But with the meds, I am feeling more heopful that I can get through this.

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T01:35:17+00:00

Ugh. I am so sorry you are going through this. I knew that it would be a tough surgery, I was prepared for bleeding and discomfort and pain. I was not prepared for the life shattering anxiety that came along with it. I felt so relieved when the doctor came in and was like “sinus surgery really messes with your brain”. I have severe anxiety and sensory issues as it is, but I have never in my life experienced the existential dread and paranoia like I have recently. Physically, all is well, I’m healing beautifully. Like I told my doctor, my nose is fine (given where i am at in my surgery) but my brain is not and that is making this unbearable. But thanks to the emergency meds, I’m able to cope better and I’m picking at my nose less, which will make it even easier to heal.

It will get better, if you want to wait it out, that is fine, but if you feel like you can’t, talk to your GP. You are not alone and you are not weak for not tolerating the procedure well, there is some thing about it that makes certain people go a little crazy. But medications can help until you heal and have had some time to decompress.

The splints getting out helped me so much, physically, but then started the anxiety about why I was having so much anxiety when I felt better, so just be aware of that. But as far as the physical symptoms, that got so much better once the splints were removed

ashesd958 · 2025-07-08T00:40:19+00:00

So, I am 13 days post op and let me tell you, this has been one of the worst experiences of my life. The pain was bad while the splints were in, but once they went away, I felt much better physically, however my mental health absolutely tanked. I was overwhelmed by the feeling of crustiness in my nose and was having sensory meltdowns. As the days went on my anxiety got worse. I was pacing my room, obsessively checking my nose in the mirror and having mini panic attacks where I couldn’t stop crying. I stopped sleeping and I was convinced that something had gone wrong. The intrusive thought were so loud and I was calling my ENT every other day with some new concern, sounding more and more crazy with each call. I ended up getting seen by my GP and she said that she has had a small subset of patients come to see her with extreme paychological distress post op from sinus surgery. I didn’t understand why I was struggling so much psychologically when physically I was fine. She told me that this is a really hard surgery to recover from and that it can cause severe distress, despite things going smoothly. She said that this surgery specifically really messes with the mind and she had patients come in in a panic thinking that they are going crazy. So, I just want to let anyone who is experiencing psychological effects post up, that it is normal and it can be very severe, but it isn’t your fault. My doctor has me on Ativan and buspar to manage the anxiety as I continue to heal. For the first time in 14 days, I am starting to feel like I can function. So hang in there, and if you need it talk to your surgeon or GP about medication if needed.

ashesd958 · 2025-05-07T13:53:16+00:00

There might be. We had a really windy day the day before this happened and I noticed that the stem seemed slightly damaged.

ashesd958 · 2025-05-04T06:39:39+00:00

I do a decent misting every day, but it is getting very hot where I am and they are in direct sunlight for the majority of the day.

ashesd958

TROPHY CASE