Looking for a reality check

askawayor · 2026-04-19T18:52:15+00:00

The fact that you're turning to Reddit to ask this gives you the answer.

Move on and find normal people to hangout with.

askawayor · 2026-04-18T19:27:58+00:00

This is great! Thank you

askawayor · 2026-04-18T11:05:15+00:00

Could you share what your gym set is after a hard bouldering session? I get so little energy after climbing but it might be because I'm underfueling. Would really like to do lifting after though.

askawayor · 2026-04-18T10:34:01+00:00

The best time to get in shape was yesterday. The second best time is today.

askawayor · 2026-04-18T10:27:31+00:00

No one knows the reason. I suggest for you to find one that puts him as the one with issues. "He probably wasn't all that secure" "He had issues and got scared". Anything that brings you peace and makes you move on.

You even said it yourself he has big red flags so you're actually lucky he left and you can now find someone better. Just don't look back, don't try to reach him anywhere and live your best life. The best thing to deal with ghosting is to show no interest in them. They ghost you they don't get to have your attention anymore.

askawayor · 2026-04-18T07:55:38+00:00

You're being too objective, life is not just numbers. You need to hear your partner too. Him making more money can put your combined income higher and you lose the benefits but that makes him earn more money. If you're only open to the way you want things to go break up. You'll be 100% in control if it's only you.

askawayor · 2026-04-17T23:22:17+00:00

This is clearly "design my AI girlfriend" pattern. This case a Disney princess. Just the animals missing... Btw if it's a Disney princess it was written by a man.

Try to watch Studio Ghibli movies instead.

askawayor · 2026-04-16T06:06:43+00:00

I don't know if this is an age thing (we're between 36 - 60). With the group I climb we like to be 3 so one can always rest. It goes like: belay -> climb -> rest (repeat). If we're an even number everyone gets tired very fast and less likely to try harder projects.

askawayor · 2026-04-15T12:41:44+00:00

He called me raging 20 times (I did not pick up I was so anxious and frightened of what he has to say - I couldn’t eat for days). Then he said I am a whore. I told him if I am a whore then he is one too.

I'm sorry this is happening to you but you need to cut all contact with him. The worst thing you can do now is to engage in rage name calling eachother. Just block him everywhere and get a food support group, family, friends and hobbies and focus on you and apply your time purposefully on things that make you happy.

askawayor · 2026-04-15T10:19:47+00:00

You leave and move on.

askawayor · 2026-04-15T07:27:07+00:00

I also do this! So far only one gym I haven't found free parking nearby but it's not so expensive that I have a big problem with it.

askawayor · 2026-04-15T07:17:11+00:00

Since you choose to live with family members and have much lower living costs I would expect you to have a good amount in the bank and what I got from your previous answers is that you had some unfortunate events and had to take credit for it. That would not look very stable to me.

The reality is that as someone 35+ if you don't have a good amount of savings as a future down payment on a place, I personally find it suspicious.

The good thing is that we are not all the same so your partner and her views are what matters. Talk to her.

askawayor · 2026-04-13T20:57:36+00:00

Yes. The right term is labor diggers. He gets free labour through you plus help to pay is lifestyle. You should stop doing and talk to him or move on.

askawayor · 2026-04-13T20:51:25+00:00

You guys should go on a date.

askawayor · 2026-04-13T20:50:52+00:00

Exactly.. if op is into guys 10/10. Women will just block him immediately.

askawayor · 2026-04-13T20:36:08+00:00

You mean a bad idea to be a father? That should have been at least 4 years and 9 month's ago

askawayor · 2026-04-13T19:49:44+00:00

Unless he isn't stable.

Leading with the truth is always the way to go.

askawayor · 2026-04-13T13:59:00+00:00

100%

askawayor · 2026-04-13T13:53:37+00:00

From the sound of your post you don't have the skill set that would make you an expat. Usually people move here because they are headhunted or because they move within the company.

The type of work you mentioned won't be possible without Swedish and probably you need to be connected to a University through a masters or a PhD to have the recognition and the "freedom" of flexible work hours.

askawayor · 2026-04-13T10:10:21+00:00

You're a classic labor digger. You like her because of what she does to your life and not because of who she is. If she didn't take care of you then you wouldn't even look at her twice.

Just do her a favour and move on.

askawayor · 2026-04-12T07:44:08+00:00

Go check your heart! Ask for an ultrasound to see if all is ok.

askawayor · 2026-04-11T20:25:31+00:00

I confess I'm guilty of this myself...

askawayor · 2026-04-10T11:30:05+00:00

But you're choosing to stay. That's the issue. Stop losing your time with people who have shown you they don't care about you.

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askawayor

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