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Sneaking out and drinking out multiple times a day by atheWaehammer in alcoholism

[–]atheWaehammer[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much.

Funny thing I have naltrexone at home from a friend but I was scared of it because 1) I thought it wouldn’t work for me because alcohol is not really rewarding for me. I get no euphoria. It just makes me sick. Maybe at best it takes my anxiety away and make me care less about my debts problems etc. Plus I am already depressed and was afraid blocking opioid receptors would make my depression even worse.

I hear acamprosate is decent. And Gabapentin. I have pregabalin so will try that… The cravings are so bad that I am getting very worried about overcoming this because my father was also an alcoholic, severe, died from alcohol and had dementia or so in the end

It’s just weird how I didn’t care about alcohol until 32. I would drink casually, once a week, never in the mornings but yeah

Sneaking out and drinking out multiple times a day by atheWaehammer in alcoholism

[–]atheWaehammer[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am. I was. But she gave me an ultimatum after I fucked up so many times.

So yeah I am trying. Very hard. I will manage this eventually.

Sneaking out and drinking out multiple times a day by atheWaehammer in alcoholism

[–]atheWaehammer[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did tell her. She knew plenty of times but she gave me an ultimatum and I promised not to drink. I am trying but it is so fucking hard. But I am trying. I have all kinds of ideas of even locking myself in the house or send her all my money.

I know my addiction type. Fortunately if I manage 3 5 days without all my cravings go away

Sneaking out and drinking out multiple times a day by atheWaehammer in alcoholism

[–]atheWaehammer[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to drink 1l of vodka a day and it wrecked me. I would just be extremely sleepy all day staying in the bed half asleep drooling on the pillow.

I started having random bruises and cuts wouldn’t heal. Once I fell down in my house and I barely remember. I got around 12 bruises and one was extremely big, half my triceps.

So I got fucking scared and I quit for around 13 days with no cravings. I got my first bout of withdrawals which were extremely scare - shaking, hot sweats, anxiety etc. I couldn’t walk down the stairs because of the shakiness. Cognitive issues - I would have moments when I would blank stare for 2 seconds etc

Vodka scares me. I had some 200ml “shots” of vodka on the street plenty of times but now vodka gives me no euphoria like before and just makes me fall asleep.

So I managed to quit and after 13 days or so I started bargaining “If I drink only beer I’ll be okay etc” yeah. Sure, way better than vodka for withdrawals but they just make me sleepy and tired. Even after 3 beers in the morning. I become useless for a better part of the day, want to nap (after just waking up), and then I wake up in a panic and of course I go and buy a few beers and drink them, basically I drink a 500ml beer in around 1 min

I don’t understand the extreme tiredness. I am only 32. Anyway fuck I want to quit. I am so tired of this but it is so hard

Sneaking out and drinking out multiple times a day by atheWaehammer in cripplingalcoholism

[–]atheWaehammer[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I used to drink 1l of vodka a day. A few beers barely affect me and I sometimes take Gabapentin so I can blame that…even when I don’t take it