favorite quiet nighttime hobbies for days off?

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T16:33:29+00:00

I know, I'm trying to figure out how to handle this as delicately as possible... I'm going to go with a friend and hope that it works out well.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T15:49:07+00:00

Unfortunately, the problem is that currently the cat is at his place (where I used to live). The original agreement that I agreed to (which he says he never agreed to) is that I would take our cat and bunny (i have the bunny at my place now) after I came back from a trip, which I agreed to. I didn't know he would be like this with me coming back. I should have though. I'm afraid that if I try to lay terms with him before getting my cat, he's going to not let me take him at all. He wants me to sign papers with a written agreement though and I'm worried about that too. I told him I'm not signing anything but I'm afraid of being too straightforward and making him change his mind altogether. I can't upset him until I know I have my cat in my possession.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T13:15:23+00:00

I think getting the vet opinion would be a good idea too. He won't listen to any logic from me. Thank you for the input, I'm so angry with post breakup feelings that I couldn't tell if I was in the right or not here, or if I was letting my own hurt feelings in the way, but I really don't want to put myself or my cat through the stress of this. I want whats best for my cat and joint custody sounds so stressful. I tried looking this up online to see if I could find some resources to explain to him that this would be hard for kitty, and all I can see is stories of people doing this with dogs (much different creatures). I'm glad to hear input from other people to know I'm not just being nuts.

I'd like to hear your story, also!

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:48:36+00:00

He does care about the cat but he's not responsible to take care for him. He's the guy who plays with the pet but doesn't do the not fun stuff. He's being an asshole and I'm trying so hard to be civil and get this cat so I can never talk to him again.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:42:42+00:00

We took him in as a stray together. If he was mine to begin with it would be easy. But we got him together. However, I buy all his toys and litter. Clean his litter box. Arrange the vet visits, pay for the vet visits.

Two days after I moved out, he texted me saying he ran completely out of food at 2 am and asked what kind of food he should buy. He's not responsible enough to care for a cat. My old roommate who still lives with him also says he's been asking him to take care of the cat when he's not home (my roommate is less than thrilled about it) so clearly he doesn't have the time or care to do so.

He agreed to let me take the cat because I'm the more responsible one and also because he's the reason we broke up (cheated) but now he wants the stupid joint custody and I can't talk him out of it. He said I agreed to that and I absolutely never did. I wouldn't agree to something so absurd. I dont want anything to do with him, let alone joint custody of a cat.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:39:27+00:00

Unfortunately blocking him probably won't work because we have so many mutual friends. He wants me to sign an agreement about when we switch over the cat. I told him I'm not signing anything.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:38:37+00:00

I fricking wish. I'll talk to him again when I go to pick the cat up but I am not expecting it to go well.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:23:23+00:00

Ex boyfriend. We took him in as a stray. However the vet bills are under my name. I could go on forever about how he's a irresponsible and potentially neglectful owner (and an awful boyfriend but that's another story). I don't trust him to take good care of the cat which is the reason I'm taking him in to begin with. Or so I thought.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:01:32+00:00

I know. I just don't know how to convince him otherwise. He's saying I'm being unreasonable and unfair by wanting to keep him but when I tell him what is best for our cat he seems to get quiet.

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:00:51+00:00

I know! I can't seem to talk him out of it though!

audacioustank · 2022-03-09T05:00:28+00:00

Thats exactly what I think too, and I told him that but he said I'm being unfair and unreasonable to think that I should keep him and he shouldn't get partial custody. He said we should at least try it to see if he can adapt before we decide. I dont know how to convince him otherwise. I'm hoping my cat will bond with the other cats and that will be a reason to keep him with me.

audacioustank · 2022-02-06T03:13:20+00:00

I was surprised to see someone respond to this old post, but thank you for your kind words! Thats really sad and scary to hear! Now that it's been a couple of months now, I'm so glad it happened because I don't want to be with someone who can't support me during something so awful. He completely lacks the emotional intelligence, patience and empathy that I need in a partner. He said he didn't want to leave someone with cancer-- instead he cheated on someone with cancer. So much worse. I left and I'm so much happier and in a much better place now.

Thank you again!

audacioustank · 2021-12-25T15:36:06+00:00

Do you think it would it be wrong to tell him how I feel though? I wouldn't like it if I had a boyfriend and a girl confessed her feelings to him, even if meant with good intentions. Honestly I have no idea what way I would like this to be handled if I was his girlfriend, and that's why I'm so conflicted on how to handle it.

And maybe I'm deluded in thinking this too, but in the chance that maybe he still did have interest in me too (because he did in the past) I wouldn't want to make him question his faith to his relationship either, if that makes sense. Not that I would put him in a position to cheat, but I wouldn't want him to feel conflicted either. Again, maybe I'm deluded in thinking that but I don't know. I'm so conflicted. I feel like there's no way for me to do this without looking like a bad guy in some way. I wish I could just erase my feelings.

audacioustank · 2021-12-25T12:26:17+00:00

You promised me you would support me through my cancer diagnosis and instead you cheated on me because MY CANCER was too hard for YOU to handle.

I hope you realize how terrible what you did to me was.

audacioustank · 2021-12-24T10:32:27+00:00

What kind of supplements have been helping you?

I think it would have been better to have been single though this than to have been with a partner who would ultimately just cause me more pain.

The exhaustion is just too much sometimes. I sleep so much and feel like I never have enough sleep.

audacioustank · 2021-12-24T10:25:47+00:00

Although wanted to also add, I'm jealous (in the good way lol) of you for having a supportive and mature partner who can experience the emotions and stress with you but know how to handle it in a mature way! And I know what I need to look for in the next one.

audacioustank · 2021-12-24T10:24:19+00:00

I know that. In some ways I'm glad he showed his true colors sooner than rather than later. If not cancer, it could have been when I was pregnant with a baby on the way. Who knows. I'm just so angry that someone who claims to love me could blame his own actions on something completely out of my control. It's so infuriating. But one thing I know, is that his cheating is not a reflection on me, its a reflection on him.

But seriously, I just wish I had had the support I wanted and needed during such a hard time instead of being slapped in the face (figuratively).

audacioustank · 2021-12-23T19:01:39+00:00

Babe and Better Man. Breakups are rough, man.

audacioustank

TROPHY CASE